Sunday, August 30, 2020

Today Is Sunday

I stayed up too late last night, and now I am tired. Maybe my coffee will pep me up. Yesterday was a normal day. Ideally I'd like to do something productive after work Saturday, but I haven't added that to my repertoire yet. I usually am tired. 

I have my Sunday shit to do, but it doesn't seem too vital I go shopping today. I have to do laundry, and workout. I have to read some too. This week is definitely going to be a read week. I  have to finish my two books. 

On Sunday my day off, I don't have anything too pressing going on. I always feel like I am go go go, and I don't feel it is necessary today. Maybe I'll just read a bit, and start my day later. I can quick throw a batch in the washer. Of course the coffee is starting to work,  so maybe I will just go go go.  Weird how that works. 

This week may be a little busy with work, cuz of the holiday. but maybe not crazy either. Fall is coming pretty quickly. Football,  elections,  lasagna, etc...   changing seasons is the best. Out with the old, and in with the new. 

It seems I should come up with some new goal, but I got nothing right now. More of the same is fine with me. I don't have any crazy need to "accomplish" anything.  Nothing that comes to mind anyway. I do pretty good with work, eat, sleep I guess. 

Today should be okay I think. I don't have any pressure really. I have a few things to do, but not a ton. I think I'll search for a recipe for dinner. That's always a good Sunday thing. 

My World is pretty small. As to protests,  and shootings etc... I don't own a gun. I've never fired a gun. In my life guns aren't necessary. I've always lived in pretty safe areas, where not a lot of bad things happen. The areas I've lived have been mostly white. I have absolutely no idea what it is like to be a black man living in the USA. Not a clue. 

I really have lived an unremarkable life. I haven't done any great things. None on my to do list either. In life you really want to feel good on the inside. I do that pretty good,  but it's a whole long story as to how I got here. A story that doesn't really matter really. I know the story,  and so does the creator of  the story. I am known. I can be seen. I live in the light cuz I am such a way that I am not ashamed. 

My story isn't done yet.  That seems incredible huh?  It's been going on for over 30 years. Crazy right. At an  age where most lives are opening up for people mine went a different way. Death showed up, a college graduation,  a break up.  More than anything I think the realization that I was not a very good person. 

There was the person I wanted to be, and the one I was. A gap between the two. A gap I couldn't bridge no matter what I did. I tried. That is so long ago. Seems weird. A lot of things popped up along the way. Things that seemed important, and what I guess I learned is our lives are as significant, and with as much purpose as a sand pebble on the beach. Not much. None of it really matters. We are here for a while and gone. Shit that happened to me 30 years is no longer even important. Nothing significant remains. 

I got work,  eat, and sleep. That's fine by me, cuz I feel good on the inside,  even as I am as insignificant as anyone. My life sure didn't get sloppy either did it?  Left to my own devices at 24 years old, I would have created a pretty sloppy life. I was saved from myself in that regard.  

Anyway, I spose. 

Laterzzzzzzzz          :)

xoxo.        :)

xxoo.        :)

Byeeeeeeeee.         :)))

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