A Little Equals A Lot.

So yesterday I planned on cutting the grass. It was a non workout day, so I could come straight home and do it. I got that done, and watered the back garden. I had a little section I needed to fabric, and mulch in the back. I did that. It needs more mulch but that's it. Getting gravel delivered today too. That is for the end of our yard. We have parking there too. It goes next to our driveway. Refilling most, and filling the section that is empty due to driveway construction. I bet by the end of next weekend we will have the majority of our stuff done. Then what will I do? 

Yesterday was hard for me to wake up. I may doze for a bit after my early alarm, but yesterday I slept til my middle alarm. Basically my early morning routine was shot so I stayed in bed til my late alarm.

I turned my AC on yesterday too. It was 81 inside the house. Overnight was going to only be 70°, so I thought of turning it on for a couple days. It's pretty sweet. I have it set for 73°, and might switch it to 74°  it's a nice luxury regardless.

Not much else going on. I did think what is my blog about this year?  I got nothing.  More and more about nothing is my feeling.  Just my little life of little consequence is all I see. I am not really doing anything important.  My life is pretty easy. I got a pretty good routine that works for me. I am not out changing the World. I don't really do anything special of any consequence. I gather we all ride in that boat.

I don't know people all too well. I have no idea what makes them tick. What do people think they want out of life?  I know they want to be happy. In people's minds are ways for that to happen I guess. It's hard cuz people don't even know the tools that are available. More is hidden than isn't. It's why money is brought into any equation I guess. Money is something people can kinda quantify to a point.

The heart we don't control. Our heart is the key to our outlook. How do you perfect that? What is a good way to be? 

I know the direction I go, although these days I am just running in place kinda. Not doing anything, and not going anywhere.  Still blogging, but pretty much about nothing. No reason for it, but it is something I do so. 

I guess it's fine. It is Summer, and Summer is fine. Until the dog days. The days where warm weather is just boring.  Then all of a sudden it cools down,  and we start thinking of pumpkin muffins, and Apple picking.  Football too.

For me the 4 seasons are good for the mind. All my plants in the front will die, and come back to life.  I like that too.

Anyway i spose. 

Laterzzz.        :)

xoxo.      :)

xxoo.       :)

Byeeeeeeee.       :)))

Not Much Going On Here.

Good morning. How's it going?  I am fine. I dozed for an hour after my early alarm,  so I am behind. It's a workout day, and best I take Hope before. It's fine, just less time for reading. I am getting toward the end, and it's pretty exciting. Yesterday I didn't feel like reading after work. I dozed for a bit when I got home, then did a few things. Ate dinner,  and watched a few episodes of its always Sunny.

So basically a normal day. Today shouldn't be too different. I have to get a haircut sometime, and buy some more shorts for work. I ripped a pair yesterday on a sink. I lost one recently, and another already have a small rip in the pocket. They are old. I don't even like them.   :)  Plus I still have some shit to do outside. This is why the change of seasons are good. There is a lot of shit to do in the Spring, Summer, and Fall. In the winter everything slows down.   The furthest thing from my mind is seeing a movie after work.  Mostly I hope I am not too tired, and I feel motivated to get shit done. At least that's the way I feel today.

We still have stuff to do, but it's not even July. Speaking of I'll have a whole extra day off next week. That will come in handy.

Holland is sorta a tourist destination in Summer, although I suspect the West Michigan coast is. Where people find the time is beyond me. I am too busy, and have too much to do. Who would be able to relax while on vacation?  That's how my life looks right now. I am cool with it too. On vacation you spend a ridiculous amount of money. While working you make money, and I'm too busy to spend it. Not really I guess, cuz you spend money while doing projects. I'm okay though. This existence is fine. I'm not looking over my shoulders.

I'll tell you something I thought of. I don't give a fuck about College Baseball, but Michigan is in the championship, so I googled college World Series, cuz normal sports outlets don't give a fuck about College Baseball either. For some reason Google showed Zach Lavine  is selling his mansion somewhere. Putting it up for sale. The dude is probably in his mid 20s I am guessing. He plays for the Bulls.  A mansion?  Property taxes are one thing. Upkeep is another.  I suspect professional athletes have to have that shit done for them. That's a lot of money. Also I suspect a lot of rooms to not use. Whose furnishing them? 

No matter who you are you'll always find ways to blow money. Bigger isn't better anymore. Bigger is just more stuff to spend money on, and more shit to worry about. I could see the excuse you have all the money you'd ever need, but nobody ever really feels that way. It's not how we are made. The 52 year old me would buy property, and build a small house if I was 25, and a multi millionaire.  If the 20-something me was a millionaire who knows.  That wasn't going to be in the equation post turn anyway.  Last thing I gave a shit about was money. 

Til this day I find it silly people think money in whoever's hands make their lives better. Give money to this cause for whatever reason. Money is an entity of this World.  It's not real. It's just something most/all are enslaved too.

If you're argument for a better World has money in the equation than your whole premise is wrong.

Money does not change your insides. To fix yourself don't rely on money.

Easy to say right?  Everyone is in a money rat race.

Anyway i spose. 

Laterzzzzzzz.        :)

xoxo.       :)

xxoo.      :)

Byeeeeeeeeee.         :)))

Coffee Please.

Good morning. How's it going?  Me, I am fine. I slept really good last night. Feel way better rested than Monday. Seems weird right. I don't feel rested I don't want coffee. I feel rested, and I want coffee. If I am tired coffee won't help me. It won't all of a sudden make me feel rested. If I had a good night sleep coffee will have a positive effect.

I did look for a little pick me up as the day went on. I ate a cinnamon roll. They are pretty good. To my knowledge it is the first full cinnamon roll I've eaten. Not too shabby.

After work I had to work out. After work I didn't want to work out. :)  I did it, cuz my routine I can power through. I'm actually at the stage where I am probably going to up the weights again, so I got it done. Home part too. Know what?  This morning I feel pretty stoked I got the workout in. Today i think it's supposed to be sunny and warm, so should be a good day.

Yesterday was rainy, and I just chilled. I didn't watch tv or anything I just was in my head. Eventually Hope,  and I sat in the garage and watched the rain. Oh, and that's one thing. By dinner time I was at 23,000 steps or so. I just worked, I don't feel like I really did anything. On Sunday I felt I did stuff, and by dinner time I was under 5000 steps. Crazy right?  I guess that's what I mean,  I am active and busy just by living.

That's kinda how my life goes. The best days are the well rested days. Sleep is important. Ya kinda got to power through the non good sleep days. Luckily I usually am a pretty good sleeper. I think because I can shut everything off. There is no show or movie I need to see. Nothing online I need to see. No book I have to finish. I can just shut everything off and sleep. It also helps I don't have anything to worry about to keep me up.

Sleep is important I guess, and I do it pretty good. Today is a day. It should be okay. I have some stuff to do, and there will be a meal. Then there will be sleep. Simple life right? 

Not really much on my mind. I'll take Hope,  read more of IT, and get this day underway. 

Boring boring.    I love it.    :)

Laterzzzzz.         :)

xoxo.          :)

xxoo.           :)

Byeeeeeeeeee.         :)))

Maybe Just A Normal Day.

I kinda think I had just a normal day, but then again I have no idea what people do. I saw a movie, did my Sunday shit, read some more of IT. Almost done with it. I read on the back it took him 4 years to write it. I find it interesting the kids and as adults were just positive they had to go after it. It was there job to kill it.

Anyway the driveway is done less 5 pavers. That feels good. That's a big job done. Today i thought about sleeping in. I knew sleep was most likely over, but I thought about laying in. I had to poo so that spoiled that. Today is a non coffee day for whatever reason. I don't feel like it.

It's Summer time. Supposed to be high of around 80° all week. I don't think I'll be as busy as last week. I have stuff to do just not that major.

What do people do with days off?  How much tv do people watch?  It was almost dinner time yesterday, and I had less than 5000 steps. I did stuff too. Lisa's brother had a day off. He played video games all day long. My Dad would have watched tv all day long. His remote took a shit, so I hooked him up to watch movies. You think you want to live a long life, but you don't. You run out of things to do. Old is not graceful. Of course my Dad has always been lazy. He had moments,  but I feel he would rather not have worked a good portion of his life.

I tried that lifestyle in my early College years. Learned quickly it wasn't for me. I spent a time with my nose in a computer a lot, now I just have my phone. I never use a computer. A phone is like a computer these days, but the stuff online isn't that exciting or interesting really.

It's more fun for me to just do this thing here. Write down what pops in my head.

Today like most days I got nothing major going on in my head. Today is a day. I have stuff to do. That's good enough for me.

I think I'll try to sleep for a bit. Maybe read some more of IT. 

Laterzzz.     :)

xoxo.      :)

xxoo.      :)

Byeeeeeeeee.       :)))

Got It Done.

So yesterday I did my work thing. Like 8-1/2 hours. Stopped by the local lumberyard to pick up a few things. Friday night Lisa brought home a truck load of paving sand, so the side driveway patio was a go. I leveled as best I could, and put the patio down. Paver after paver. A fuck ton of them. It's done. If I did this shit more than once each decade I would have done a better job,  but whatever. It ain't too shabby, and now we have a place to cook out and chill in the front yard. Actually two, cuz we have a little patio nook outside our front door too.

I've been busy this week. To the tune of 94.5 miles of steps. Yikes. I really am not even tired. A busy day to day will probably energize you more than make you tired.  That's my guess anyway. It seems it does it for me.

Today I think I'll see a 10:00 AM movie. Anna is out. I like chicks who beat the Hell out of people and kill them too. I don't know why. I like the John Wick films too,  so I guess I like to see people kick ass.  I finished listening to my 11th book in the Alex Cross series. Think of the movie along comes a spider. That's him. I have like 15 left or something.   Not sure what I do after that. Another series.

So after today our front yard will be done. We have a project in the back to do. Just taking down a fence. It will be a pretty easy job. We are going to use our two free dump passes to get rid of shit too. Then all projects outside are done. Then it is just upkeep and normal shit.  The driveway was a big of the puzzle. 

So things are looking up I guess. My life is pretty fun. I live it on my own terms kinda.   I don't need anyone to be happy. It just comes internally. The grass is green where I live.  Even if there is snow on the ground.  I have so much stuff in life I just don't even have to worry about.

I don't worry about anything.

Anyway today is a day off.  Yay.   :)

Laterzzzzzzz.     :)

xoxo.        :)

xxoo.      :)

Byeeeeeeeeee.      :)))

A Timely Rain.

Good morning. How's it going?  Me, I am fine. Yesterday it rained a lot during the night. I was not going to take Hope,  so I slept til my middle alarm. I think it was a good idea, cuz I may have been really tired if I didn't. I read another chapter of IT  too, so I am almost done with the first part of the Grownups. One more grownup section left. I saw the preview of the second movie, and what happens to the girl in the movie at her old house happened in the book. You can forget a lot in 25 + years.

If you have time for such stuff I recommend you reading the book. I am really enjoying it. Maybe even moreso the 3rd time around. See the movies too. 2nd one comes out in  Sept. Don't be a book movie snob either. You know the people who say the movie is nowhere as good as the book. I hate those people. Both in most instances are entertaining.  That actually is a pet peeve of mine.

Yesterday was a day. I had some time to chill. I ended with 13-14 miles in. I made a simple dinner,  and went to bed early. It was a simple day. Nothing too exciting. I have to work out today,  and cut the grass. Supposed to be pretty nice today too.  I'll be busy.

Outside of that not much going on. Life goes on. Nothing very important or significant going on with me. Work is busy. You can kinda see where I work the stresses of an established company getting bigger. More stuff to worry about. More stuff to oversee. My second job the owner is always saying they are not trying to get any bigger, but they usually do. I finally understand why. Bigger is better yeah, but bigger = more responsibility too. Both places I work at have good employees in significant positions so not everything falls to the owners. That is necessary to have I see.  Just something I noticed. 

So anyway, like I said not much going on with me. I have stuff to do. I didn't do much yesterday just cuz everything was still pretty wet. I have enough to keep me busy though. I think that's good. At least for me.

Outside of that not much. Another day. I think I will feel the best about it if I get a lot done. That's the plan, and I am motivated so.

Gotta run.

Laterzzzzzzzz.           :)

xoxo.          :)

xxoo.          :)

Byeeeeeeeee.       :)))

I Did It Again.

So I had another day yesterday. Pretty similar to the day before. It was busy. I got my part of the driveway done. Lisa was doing this other section with pavers. Once I finished my side I went to the local lumberyard to.pick up the rest of the stuff she needed, and hopefully all or most of what we need for the patio side.

Some guy rear ended me on the way. Luckily there were 3 cops right there,  cuz some dude got the shit kicked out of him it appeared. No damage, the guy got a ticket. He works near our work,  so I told him to come in for a chicken sandwich for lunch some time. He was nervous.

Basically I got a lot done after work. I ran yesterday my typical short route. My hammies were screaming yesterday. You ever get that pain where it's just tight?  You bend over and yikes, all you want to do is sleep. That's how I felt. I think i am all better now. Not sure. You know how it is when sleeps just seems to magically repair your sore muscles? 

Today is a workout day, plus work,  and yadda yadda yadda. I plan on getting a start on the patio. It will be so nice to get that done. There is something to being so active. I don't even remember going to bed. I just know I slept good, and was pretty much awake when my early alarm went off. I feel fine too.

Other than that not much. Doing all this work has me feeling energized. More so than usual. My days start off, and I feel pretty good about them.

I know I don't grade myself on the curve. I am the way I am, and it's fine with me. I don't know how another would think of me. I cannot get in another's head that way. I cannot imagine how another thinks when it comes to how life is supposed to be. How much labor we should do etc...   My best life is living it the way I do. I am active, and I do stuff. I cannot think of a better way to live than as I do. This is my best life,  and there is nothing glamorous about it. No poet should ever make a poem about my existence cuz in the end the truth is probably just boring. Life is not remarkable.

If your heart is happy though life is a breeze. The heart is the key, and we don't control it. Hearts typically are loaded with a ton of garbage. They need to be flushed kinda. Our insides have to be cleaned out, just so we can see clearly. We don't have the power to do it either.

If arrogance is in us help is probably beyond reach. If the truth can appear,  and seemingly is trying to break us, then help is near. The walk is definitely mostly hard before it is easy.

Those who pretend their life is perfect are most definitely far away from the truth.

So much is against us. The odds definitely are not in your favor. You need to be broken. You didn't magically create a life that put you on top. We all start on the bottom, but you have to have honest eyes to accept it. That too is our problem.  We push the truth far away from us, cuz we are scared of it. Also it seems wrong.

In reality truth is über Alles. It's pretty hard though. When the truth is in us the World will seem dirty.  Hope will feel very far away.

I've done the walk.  I wandered lost being mostly just scared.  Then I went in the wilderness, and saw the brutal truth. I overcame once with help.  It wasn't me at all. Then I overcame twice, and now I have my easy day to day. Eventually I have to do it 3 times, and then things will be truly different. That which remains hidden about me will no longer be. Actually I am not really sure how things will look. Some will know me way better though. That I am pretty sure.

Anyhoo,  I spose.  I think I'll try and run again.    Yikes.   :)

Laterzzzzzz.           :)

xoxo.       :)

xxoo.      :)

Byeeeeeeeeee.       :)))

A Lot Packed Into One Day.

Good morning. How's it going?  Me, I am fine. Yesterday had a lot in it. There was a run, some reading, work, workout, outside work on the driveway,  grilling out, Monday night farmers market, and ice cream at my place of work. First night for ice cream. I had a sundae with chocolate,  caramel, peanut butter, brownie pieces, and who knows what else. It was ridiculous. I could only eat half. We got a couple scoops too in a homemade waffle cone. That's a full day.

I got home, we watched tv, and I woke up in a coma at some point, and went to bed. As far as days go that's how you like them. Busy, active, and productive.

Today shouldn't be too different. My hamstrings are tight from all the bending down the last couple days.

Other than that not much. Life goes on. Another day down,  and one just started. I don't think I thought of anything very important yesterday. Too busy maybe.  Then again maybe nothing important to think about. I am happy with my simple little life. It's pretty easy. Not a lot for me to worry about.

I guess I am about the luckiest guy in the World. I work two jobs which I like. My wife works. People live with us, but they pay rent. I have no bills, but utilities, and property taxes, and car insurance. My property taxes are only ~$2000/ year. If I sell the house, which I won't,  the value is currently doubled + from the original purchase price. Property taxes on this place will also double.

Financially I am pretty well set. It's probably something we all at some point hope for. I don't find life to be too terribly different, than if my finances weren't so set. You still gotta fill the day. Oh, I could take vacations,  but one/year seems fine. I guess you can say I am happy and comfortable in my home.

Your outlook really stems from your insides huh?  If you are happy inside everything looks pretty darn good. If you don't feel that way it would be a good thing to look into. Vacations, travel, drugs whatever won't cure a negative  outlook. That shit comes from inside. It's a poison. You really have to find the cure to the poison,  cuz it is no one's fault. People's imperfections didn't create that. More than anything I'd say it was false preconceptions of how you thought life would be.

When you accept the harsh realities that life isn't magical, than you can kinda accept the 90% horseshit that life is really made up of.

No one is perfect,  so your lives aren't perfect. Your spouse's aren't perfect, and if you have kids either are they. Not one perfect thing about your life actually. No fairy tales of happily ever after. Once you see life for what it really is you can accept it and chill a bit.

Pride hurts people,  really just everything that isn't true. Even little things like pictures of how your perfect life is does harm. Anything that keeps you from the truth hurts you.

We all are a bunch of fucking liars too.

Anyway I spose. 

I got another day today. Glad I get to live mine, and not yours.    :)

Laterzzzzzzz.      :)

xoxo.        :)

xxoo.      :)

Byeeeee.        :)))

Probably My Best Day Off In A Long While.

It wasn't because I did a ton of fun stuff. I didn't go out to eat anywhere special. I didn't go to the beach or anything. We had a plan to get a lot of shit done, and we did. I got all my normal Sunday stuff done, and worked a good 6 hours outside. We got half our driveway stuff done. It wasn't hard at all,  and it is coming out fine. I think we will be able to finish it today. We might have got more done, but it started raining. I didn't even see rain in the forecast. The rain this year has been pretty great. I haven't really had to water much at all. Temps so far have been pretty mild too. We have had a pretty excellent Spring.

I sat outside, and had a couple drinks. I have a limit I keep myself too. I almost went over.  I had another drink poured untouched.   :)  if we finish the sidewalk area today, which is pretty much all we have left. Than we can do the patio to the side. That should be easy. Nothing we are doing is hard at all. The job when looked at it's entirety looked pretty daunting.

I slept a lot this weekend. I looked at my weekly miles. I crossed over the 80 mile barrier. I don't feel worse for the wear. I was over 18,000 steps on my day off too.

Not a ton else going on with me. I feel good. I feel rested,  although I wasn't excited about getting up at first. I am excited about getting our stuff done.

I guess things are just kinda fun. Today will be busy. I have to work,  workout,  help Lisa finish what she doesn't,  eat a meal, and chill.

I guess everything still is easy. Sleep comes to me naturally. Today I thought I woke up tired,  but I am not. I am ready for another day. My day off had more labor than usual, but I am no worse for the wear.

Okay, a dumb update I know, but that is how my life goes.

It's pretty easy. Mostly cuz how I seem to always feel on the inside. Time to take Hope,  and read IT.

Laterzzzzzz.       :)

xoxo.          :)

xxoo.       :)

Byeeeeeeeeee.        :)))

This Before Reading.

Good morning. How's it going?  Me, I am fine. I woke up early, and kinda worried about what to do. IT. I forgot I've been reading a chapter or two after my runs, and before work. Today I have off, so I could read a good chunk.

Yesterday was normal. I worked,  and saw a movie after. Godzilla. It was fine. I wanted to see Men In Black, but it started a half hour later. After that we went to the local lumberyard,  and got everything to finish the side of our driveway, and sidewalks. We'll start today,  and finish tomorrow if we don't finish today.

It's kinda nice starting your day off with a plan. I have stuff to keep me busy. I figure I'll work til like 1:00 or two or so, and then chill. Maybe go to Saugatuck for some Rum Runners. I do that at least once per year, and I skipped last year. That would be fun.

Not a lot going on with me. Can't wait to get my update on weekly miles. Pretty sure this week will be my record. I may approach 80 miles I think. That may turn to my norm, cuz work will be stupid busy for a couple months minimum. I doubt I see many if any weeks at my main job at 40 hours or below.

That's fine. We did our last costly project in the driveway, so that's it. Next year we are planning on building a deck in our back. Cut out a window,  and turn it into a door to step onto the deck. We currently have a shitty concrete slab patio. It sucks. I may do something else too. We'll worry about it next year.

I feel pretty good being busy. It's exciting you know?  A lot of stuff to get done. It's fun. It helps a ton I am energized. I am excited to get stuff done. I like my days filling up. Today will be good,  cuz I am going to get a lot done. I'll feel good about myself as I usually do. My day will be filled with labor. I'll start the week off in a good frame. My day off this week will be fun.

I decided to blog before reading, cuz I won't blog if I don't. Also my schedule now is such a way I can conceivably blog 6 days/week. That would put my blog totals pretty high for the year. Not that it matters in anyway. Running stats don't mean anything, but they are fun to check out.

Also it's not important I do this so often. I don't feel i say anything too important. It's just what I do you know? 

I have a day to day, and I write about it I guess.  Not that it is terribly exciting. It's just my little life.

I like it.  :)

Laterzzzzzz.        :)

xoxo.      :)

xxoo.      :)

Byeeeeeeeeee.         :)))

Just What The Doctor Ordered.

Good morning. How's it going?  Me, I am fine. I slept really good last night. Lemme check. 6 hours and 42 minutes. Day before was 6 hours and 41 minutes. My light, deep, and REM sleep are all pretty normal. I average around 45 hours of sleep each week I see. Between 6 and 7 hours each night. On average.

First off my erosion plan didn't fly with the boss,  so I got some work to do. That's fine. As long as there is a plan,  I can labor. The plan is in place.

Yesterday was rainy, and I kinda liked it. For one I could drive to work,  and get groceries after. It was a non workout day too. It was like 55°, windy, and rainy. Basically cold, so I made more of a cold weather meal. I did all the dishes too. Sometimes that shit piles up. I kinda wanted a cold weather day I guess. I didn't feel guilty for not working outside. I love being outside, but I guess yesterday was just a nice change for whatever reason. Today will be nice, but maybe not so sunny. It's a workout day too.

It's Friday,  the end of the week kinda. I am well rested, and ready to go. You always want to start your day feeling recharged,  and I do that most days. Tomorrow I open up our driveway to park on it. It will be 8, and 9 days of the 7 recommended.  (2 days to pour) Just to be safe you know. Also, I am going to put a sealer on after the 4th.

Other than that my life moves on. It's pretty easy,  and pretty fun. Work,  eat, chill, sleep. I guess I should add chill to the equation since I definitely do that. The end of the day you know?  Kick back, chill,  and eat a meal.

I like having my days filled. Mostly I never feel guilty for having a lazy day. Maybe cuz I rarely do. My life is pretty much set I guess. I know my days will fill up. I know I'll mostly be content with them. I will fall asleep, and wake up recharged. Ready to do another.

Nothing too complicated about me, except the fact you cannot walk in my shoes. My shoes are exclusive. Special order if you will. You cannot pay for them with a currency of this World. Nope,  they are special. I am not even in the best shoes yet. Those come later. You were born with your shoes as we all are. They may have changed directions as the wind does,  but they are still the same ones.

They are ones that don't help you feel content. Always another thing to strive for. My shoes I didn't get cuz I was perfect. I got 'em cuz I was faithful,  and obedient. I didn't harden my heart. I believed,  and actually asked for courage. I knew I was to play the fool, so I needed a heart that could endure that. I wasn't really good at that you know?  I did care what people thought,  and I had no desire to play the fool.

Now my heart is strong. I am confident, and secure. Either you are with me or you aren't. If you aren't you are welcome to go your own way. I am not responsible for other's actions. I am powerless to do much of anything. It's not my story being played out. I am a vessel being used in a story. I ain't special in the least.

I know who I am. I know my path. Confidence and assuredness are pretty powerful stuff I guess.

Anyways, I spose. I'll take Hope for a little run. Super slow and easy.

Laterzzzzz.        :)

xoxo.        :)

xxoo.         :)

Byeeeeeeee.          :)))

Rain Made My Day Easier.

It didn't quite rain a ton yesterday, but it spit some. It's supposed to rain a good portion today, so basically I didn't have to water. I decided on a plan of action for the side of the driveway. Erosion for the most part. Time will eventually fill the area. By this Fall, or next Spring it will take care of itself. That leaves me with much less work. It was one of those things where I knew an idea would come eventually. It so happened to come as I was working on it.

Yesterday was a pretty big day for me. Over 35,000 steps, and 16 miles. Plus I got my workout in. I was surprised I didn't get real tired. I made a simple dinner,  and fell asleep shortly after. I didn't wake up at all before my early alarm either.

To me that is a good day. I was busy, I did stuff, and yeah. That's how I like my days.  I have no clue about other people. I don't really know them. I know when we are at work we usually all are having fun. It seems everyone is always in a good mood.

My life is pretty easy. That is probably a consistent theme about me. I don't get bored, except maybe on a day off. Life hits people in different ways,  and I find I don't know really how. The more I think about it the more I don't know people I guess.

What I do know is life is easy for me. I know why. I also know life is not easy for you, and I also know why the reason for that is too. In what ways I don't know.

I am excited about my day to day. It is easy and fun for me. I'd rather do this than go on vacation. I suspect life can be a grind for people. A lot of have to do, when people would perhaps do what only they want.

I feel people think they know what they want, but when they get it they still aren't content. Maybe not even happy. The ideas we get in our head of how we think we want our lives to be, don't lead to our contentment. Our day dreams lead us astray. I know that,  cuz I had other ideas for how I wanted my life to be. I went my way, and boom, I got all I needed. It wasn't much. A content heart is all I needed. Fame, and fortune, and whatever else we think we want don't fulfill us.

Who knew? 

Anyways. I was thinking of walking just cuz I've run a lot of days in a row. (For me)  I think I'll run though.

Laterzzzzzz.         :)

xoxo.       :)

xxoo.        :)

Byeeeeeeeeee.        :)))

Ending The Day Beat.

So yesterday once again I had a full day. I worked,  cut the grass,  took Hope,  biked. My steps were over 14 miles. I even got on the roof with my leaf blower to get rid of the helicopters. My neighbor followed my example. I have guards for my gutters, and he doesn't. He had to scoop out his gutters. Glad I got them. I chilled for a bit, but really the end of my day equaled exhaustion. I watered everything too, and ran the robot.

I did think of the end of my day. I was exhausted. By the time I ate I could not keep my eyes open. I did have a couple drinks, and that helped, but I did not want another drink. I wanted sleep. My day was complete. I needed to rejuvenate myself. I feel that is a good day.

Other than that not much. Another day down I reckon. The days definitely fill up in the summer.  Today I have to work,  workout, water the grass, water the tomatoes,  run the robot,  work on the side of the driveway, dinner has to be made. Today will fill up like no ones business. I'd rather be busy than not. This is how I like life.

I imagine a lot has to come from desire. I want to be active. I want to do stuff. There will be plenty of time to relax when we are 6' under. I realize me feeling good about me, and feeling good about  my life  is a pretty good way to be. My heart is such a way that I feel like I am living the ultimate life.

I ain't doing anything earth shattering. I don't need any accolades for anything, and I don't deserve any anyway. I am accepted,  and I accept me.

In our youth we peak. Our physical attributes eventually start to diminish. Those who never exercise it probably happened pretty quickly after HS. I feel i just am hitting my peak. My life is getting better, or at least I feel really good about it and me. I don't look to the past for better days. These are the better days.

A life where I am busy,  I have stuff to do. I couldn't ask for anything more than what I have. A simple life which allows me to easily close my eyes and fall asleep.

Tomorrow comes, and I can start over. Do it again. My outlook is the way it is cuz how I feel on the inside. I feel good you know?  Being content in life is definitely better than perhaps everything. Stress does not live here.

Anyways I spose.

Laterzzzzzzzzz.       :)

xoxo.        :)

xxoo.         :)

Byeeeeeeeee.        :)))

I Think About Sleep.

It is definitely something I think about. I woke up at my early alarm. Decided to just rest a bit. I fell into a deep sleep. A wake up wondering what planet I am on kinda sleep. It was only a half hour. I felt it could have been 5 days. I guess that's good.

Yesterday was a pretty full day. I had to work a bit late, I had to get a workout in, and I ended up over 31,000 steps. I made tacos, and that hit the spot. I didn't do much besides that, but I picked up the front yard, so I'll be ready to mow.   I was definitely tired at the end of my day. My meal really hit the spot. I guess that's how I'd like to feel at the end of my days.

Outside of that not much at all. I don't think about much stuff. I am pretty lucky just being me I guess. I have no idea what goes through other people's heads. For me I wouldn't want anyone's life but my own. I don't need to create some great life. This is it. This is fine. I don't think I really put too much concern in what people think of me. I wouldn't know how they think. I feel pretty good about me.

I can do this silly blog, and it ain't no thing. People can get a look inside me, and that's fine. I do know inside people is not the same as what I have. You cannot make that stuff. People seem to always be lacking something huh?  Not enough money, not enough free time, not time for travel. I am so busy at x at the expense of y. I don't know another's internal stress, I just know they have it. What it's about i don't know.

Actions in life have reactions. I don't know what another views as a perfect life. There really isn't such a thing. What everyone seeks for is contentment. Our minds think up some avenue for us pursue that.

What we want most we can't create. The grass many/all times looks greener elsewhere.

For me, I have my days. I have stuff to do. I look forward to a meal,  and sleep. I guess my message is a tricky thing. How can some invisible force create a different existence for us? One where we feel better about all things. Why can't we do it?  We are not invisible,  AND our thumbs are helpful the way they are attached.

Anyway, that is your journey. I took mine. You are just stuck with you currently.  Brutal huh? 

Anyway i spose.

Laterzzzzzzz.      :)

xoxo.     :)

xxoo.       :)

Byeeeeeeee.       :)))

A Rainy Sunday.

Good morning. How's it going?  Me, I am fine. I think I've been up since 11:00 PM just laying in bed. I guess I was just done sleeping. I did nap at some point in the afternoon for some reason.  I did get all my Sunday stuff done, saw a movie, sat in the garage watching the rain. I got over 10,000 steps in too on a day off.

One thing I've noticed about me is I don't really have any desire to sit at a bar. Yesterday would have been perfect,  but I didn't feel like it. It's been a while since i did that. Just not feeling it I guess. I don't think I really feel like eating out much either. Maybe I just like it at home.

All of a sudden I have a lot to do. I have to fill in by the driveway where the forms were. Either fill with dirt,  and plant grass, or maybe put pavers there. Either way I got some work. I have some gardening to do, and I am running my tractor sprinkler every day it doesn't rain. Not today,  cuz we got a ton of rain yesterday. I'll have to cut my grass probably tomorrow. It will be too wet today.

I feel the rain was perfect,  cuz it is good to water your freshly poured cement. It can make your driveway 50% stronger. I started looking at driveways when I am out walking, running, or riding. People tend to just let them go. Blacktop needs maintenance. You gotta do it. Cement it says maybe every few years. You don't want to overdue it. A lot of people probably do nothing.

Anyway i think today will be busy at work. I potentially may have a lot to do. It's Monday though. I'll do what I can. I have to work out today,  and work on the side of my driveway. I am thinking tacos for dinner.

Some guy asked me if the 80s were the best time of my life, cuz you know you are young having fun. The answer is an easy no. These are the best days of my life. My life is super easy. I guess it helps I have absolutely no questions about the future. No worries.  Not a lot of responsibilities.

People live their lives. It's not my responsibility to steer them in any direction. People make mistakes. Maybe not live as healthy as they can. That's not my responsibility. I live my life. I am not held accountable for others. I find you cannot really lead people anyway. They have their own lives filled with decisions. If you make poor ones that's their fault.

I guess what I am saying is my life is easy. I don't put on any extra responsibilities for whatever reason. I live  pretty comfortable. I am not an angry person.

Lisa's brother lives with us. It took me a while, but I finally realized he is unbelievably selfish. People would do him favors,  and he would never do the same. He is like a 40 something year old trying to live an 11 year olds life. Video games all the time. Since he is 40+ he is gaining weight at an alarming rate. He drinks maybe 3- 2 litres of sugary pop each day. Metabolisms don't speed up as you get older. He no longer trims his beard or gets a haircut. I am pretty sure he makes more an hour than me, yet his wages are being garnished. He smokes pot, and cuz of asthma goes to the ER for treatments. He has like no bills.

That dude ain't my responsibility. He'll die a young death. He actually is pretty disgusting. People make bad choices in life. You'll find you cannot save one.

So on I go with my day to day. I think I'll have a day today. For the most part I probably won't be disgusting.

Laterzzzzzz.         :)

xoxo.      :)

xxoo.      :)

Byeeeeeee.        :)))

9 Hours And 35 Minutes.

That's how much I slept last night. I was in bed around 11 hours. That's not exactly living it up before your one day off, but I guess that's fine. Keeps me in my schedule. I did some googling yesterday. I found it's best if I water my freshly poured concrete, so I did. A lot. It's supposed to rain today, so I probably won't have to today.

I must have been tired yesterday. When I was driving home from work I saw some activity going on by a park by the water. Looked like maybe the library was putting it on. Families with their kids and stuff. My first thought was that looks boring. Drove by the crowded farmer's market. I do like the farmer's market. Saw the boats in the water, and someone pulling a sea doo with their car. That seemed like a lot of work. So I was  in a negative mood.

I cheered myself up by doing dishes,  and watering the concrete. I was going to grill a dinner, but went to bed instead. I could have done whatever I wanted, and sleep was what I wanted most.

Today I am up early. Ready to start the day, and that is the way I like it. I may see a movie today, cuz of the rain. Dark Phoenix is out.

I think today should be pretty okay. Remember too, I get out at 2:00 PM every day. All days can be good on my end.  Best if I am not tired, but I like sleep anyway.

Laterzzzxzz.     :)

xoxo.       :)

xxoo.        :)

Byeeeeeeee.      :)))

Finally Able To Get Up At The Early Alarm.

Good morning. How's it going?  Me, I am fine. Yesterday was okay. I was over 28,000 steps,  I chilled outside for a bit. I read some of IT, watered my tomatoes,  and watched a few episodes of its always Sunny. I had tears in my eyes laughing so hard at one episode. It was the year of 1776. Mac got wood teeth put in, cuz it was all the rage back then,  and when he talked he whistled.  It was so dumb, and I couldn't stop laughing every time he talked. I have no idea how they think that crap up. Hands down the funniest sitcom I've watched.

We got half our cement poured. Patio sidewalk, and single stall part of the driveway. The wide part of the driveway gets paved today. I have to work out, so I only miss one workout this week. I guess I had a week. Next week I concentrate on yard work. Doing a driveway tends to tear up your yard a bit. Also I got more gardening to do. I'll start watering the grass again on Monday.

Things will be busy, and I guess I like that.  Always have stuff to do. I like my balance. Work, stay active, do stuff, chill, eat, sleep. I heard about a guy who may be close to my age. He is in trouble skipping child support payments, God only knows what he does to make money. He was going to get married, and just said nah, I am out. The girl was hurt, but obviously lucked out. My age, and life completely fucked up. I'd want to escape that life.

I am just living my life doing my thing. It just occurred to me when I heard that, how some people's lives are fucked up. I've not been a Saint, but I have no baggage. Nothing that brings me down. Family,  friends,  society,  education have no say in who I am. Days in History hold no importance to me. No heroes in my World. That kind of thinking is poison, but most won't learn I guess.

You see, I have my day to day. It's easy, fun, and I suspect a healthy way to be. I wake up most days feeling pretty good. I am assured of my ways, cuz that's how it is to be me now.

I don't have any questions in life. No dreams of a better life. No questions in what I should do. My 5 and 10 year plans I don't even have to think about. My path is in good hands, and I have no worries.

It's early June, and I guess this is a pretty good and exciting time.

I am gonna take Hope. It should be a good one. I'll be able to read a bit of IT too. 

Laterzzzzzz.       :)

xoxo.        :)

xxoo.       :)

Byeeeeeeeee.         :)))

A Day Came And Went.

Our driveway is almost done. They'll pour cement today. It's a pretty impressive job. It's part know how, and still part creativity. At least for ours cuz we have a sidewalk, patio, and flower beds. It's going to look nice. It's just a crew of two older guys. It's a good trade to learn I feel. I am impressed with the job they are doing.

I slept over 7 hours again. Slept past my early alarm again too. After today everything will be settled. I wonder if the excitement of the driveway getting done has me being more tired. You know excitement stress? 

I made brats last night on the grill, and grilled zuchinni. It was good. I went to bed super early. We were just chilling outside. I was about to go back out, and decided to just go to bed. Tired me =I may as well just go to bed.

I love sleep. Nothing like a good night sleep. I don't love it enough to not wake up before I have to though. I like getting up early too if I am able. I didn't take Hope before work the last two days, but I read IT. I am definitely taking Hope in a couple minutes. I've been driving to work too, so I can get the vehicle out of the way for the driveway people.

Next week everything will be normal. You never know how I'll do with the early alarm however. School is out now, so everything will just be a bit busier I guess. Luckily this isn't Derry,  so no group of kids will have to battle IT.

Assuming all the cement gets poured today that finishes all major projects on the house. Still some minor stuff to do. Fun stuff though. You know improvements,  busy, steps,  outside Summer stuff.

Lisa has a friend battling a nasty bit of cancer. Treatment is pretty brutal. Life looks different there. I am not in that place. Outside of an accident we will all visit that place. The unknown future. Inside I guess I don't really worry about myself. I feel okay. Cancer is so bad cuz it's invisible. You never really know.

Anyway, I guess I'll have a day today. Can you imagine my driveway will be done?  Pretty exciting.

I got really nothing. I have a day today. I am healthy,  so I might as well enjoy it.

Now let's get those steps. Only 21,000 yesterday.

Laterzzzzzz.           :)

xoxo.        :)

xxoo.       :)

Byeeeeeeeeee.       :)))

That Early Alarm Has Been Impossibly Early The Last Two Days.

I slept over 7 hours last night, and only 26.5K steps. I don't know why that early alarm has been so impossible.

Yesterday was a pretty good day. I took Hope after work. I got my final check, which covers my tax bill, and my property tax bill. I don't need to diminish my savings at all. That's nice. We got our driveway ready for our concrete guy. He comes today at 8:00 AM. The only downside is I'll probably miss my workout. I can do the home part,  but I'll come home to see how things are going.

I cooked ribs on the grill which came out good. Potatoes and asparagus too. It was a good dinner. Also a pretty good day I guess.

Not much else besides that. Usually I take Hope when it is dark, but yesterday I did it after work. I see Michigan beats up driveways. A lot of them around our house look old,  and beat up. Even the million dollar homes too. The freeze thaw thing I spose. Rarely do you see people do driveway maintenance though. Blacktop sometimes. Concrete never. I'll probably do some research on that,  cuz a nice driveway is pretty nice.

I have only 8 pages left of the kids part in IT, and then I go to the grownups.  Part II of the movie.

I was just kinda... well really an internal inventory popped in my head. I feel good. No stress, life is easy as always,  outside of not being able to get up for the early alarm. All is good on that front. I am pretty lucky to have that. Oh, also I have Reeses creamer for my coffee.

So basically life goes forward. Another day down,  and another one starts. Should be okay. Most days are.

Laterzzzzzz.        :)

xoxo.            :)

xxoo.           :)

Byeeeeeeeee.         :)))

Gotta Love Sleep.

I slept an extra hour. I checked my sleep figuring it was a lot,  but it was only 6-1/2 hours. I feel it was a good sleep. As I figured, my sleep was only 4 something hours the night before.

I did my banking. I am going to close my Chase account soon. Only reason I got it was to get $550 or whatever for jumping through a couple hoops. Deposit this much, and direct deposit from one of my jobs. I am past the mandatory amount I have to keep it open. I went to 3 banks yesterday. Grabbed money from here, from here, and from here. That's ridiculous. It was just to get cash for my concrete guy. I didn't want to take it from just one bank. Whatever.

Other than that yesterday was okay. It was sunny. I had a full day.  Nothing too crazy happened. I got my full workout in. I knew I was tired after work, so I just blocked that. I knew from my last workout I am pretty strong,  so I concentrated on that.

Today I don't have much planned. Just a meal,  and yard work when I get home. My uncle's estate is almost finished. Only one check from IL left. My latest checks will pay my income tax from the IRAs. Got my cash out for the concrete guy. I'll have a $2000 property tax in August I believe, and then we just save money. Nothing big  needs to be bought.

I live a pretty simple life huh?  Nothing glamorous at all about me. I don't spend much money on travel. I don't really eat out that much, and not really expensive restaurants. It's good being 50. You don't need much anymore. I am as excited about sleep as anything else. I like working, having full days, and yeah that's about it.

I have no stress at all about trying to create my best life. It's here kinda. I guess mostly cuz my heart doesn't yearn for stuff. I have my simple day to day, and I can't dream of anything better. The only problem is I didn't make myself this way. If I was just the same old person who was born here I don't know what I would have become. It's hard saying. I tend to think my life was pulled aside before I even knew about it. You know how you learn lessons at a young age. Well College age anyway.

Pride left me early. Work while I go to school. Walk or bus to work. Also I realized when I lost my lumber yard job, I wasn't too good to work at a grocery store making minimum wage. I wasn't too good for it you know? 

Money coming in is better than no money coming in. I am not fabulous in the least. Even still my journey has left me confident and strong. I am not too good to do any labor,  but also no person do I look up to. I have no heroes. No life I'd rather live.

I remember for so long not wanting to be solo you know?  I didn't want to be the only member of the Loser's club, but now I am fine with it. Mostly cuz after overcoming the 2nd time I am no longer alone. I am accepted. Treated as an ally,  not an enemy. I am way too strong, but luckily I am slow to anger. I think I get slower and slower to anger too.

So, today I'll have a day. 73,5 miles last week too.  Should be okay.

Laterzzzzzz.          :)

xoxo.        :)

xxoo.        :)

Byeeeeeeee.         :)))

Still Gotta Get That Sunday Thing Down.

Good morning. How's it going?  Me, I am fine. My Sunday was a bit whack. More like my day off was. I woke up at 2:00 AM, but just laid there for a couple hours. That is fine with me, cuz it's Monday, and I gotta get up early anyway.

I did the blog thing, dishes, started laundry. My Dad, and I finished pulling up the pavers. We made a paver sidewalk,  and patio,  which runs from our driveway to the French Door. I forgot Lisa's uncle closed in our breezeway, and put a slider there originally.

Anyway our concrete guy is coming out this week to cement our driveway, widen it, and cement the walkway, and patio. We are going to use the pavers to make a patio on the side of our driveway. It's where we sit a lot anyway with chairs, and we grill there now currently. It has mulch now instead of pavers.

Anyway we finally finished around 10:00 AM. The Sun was beating on us. It was kinda hard work. I totally felt like a beer. We had a couple strays in the fridge. They tasted like crap. I kinda felt like a Coors Light, not some hoppy beer. I dumped them,  and we did more stuff. I expanded our garden. Went out, and got 3 more tomato plants, and beans.

I skipped lunch, and by 3:00 I was famished. I ate two whoppers. 2. That's a lot for me to eat at once. It ruined my dinner, and I napped hard for a couple hours. Jurassic Park movies were on, so I watched them for a bit, and went to bed around 8:30 or something. The 3:00 PM nap cannot happen.

I didn't sleep all that great, and dreamt a lot. A lot of my dreams have me watching natural disasters approaching. Tornadoes,  high waves etc... creating havoc, and killing people. I kinda just spectate. Not afraid or anything just watch.

I have a shit ton to do today. I have to work out, and get some cash out of a couple banks to pay our concrete guy when he comes. I have to water the lawn, and tomatoes. Eat dinner too. Happy back to Monday working for me. It should be fine. I'll get a lot of steps in today.

Outside of that not much. Today is a day. I'll fill it with labor, and stuff. This is what I do,  and what I enjoy.

This is a dumb update I know.  It happens.

Laterzzzzzzz.      :)

xoxo.            :)

xxoo.         :)

Byeeeeeeeeee.         :)))

Sundays Off.

So this is my first regular scheduled Sunday off, which is now my new normal. It feels strange,  cuz I don't know how the day should work. I'll survive it though. ;)

I found out on Friday our driveway gets done this week. I am pretty excited actually. The last big project will be done. I had no idea I would be so excited.

Also the IT book I am reading is giving me insights to me as compared to you. I am the kids in IT. I already know and understand the impossible truth. You are the grownups. You cannot see anything. You would probably have to read the book to know what I am talking about. I find it interesting. I don't think it particularly helps anything. The impossible truth is pretty scary. I am not scared anymore though,  cuz I've overcome twice.

I would imagine you suspect there is something better. It's why you look for heroes. Try to find contentment somewhere. Is the meaning of life written somewhere?

How does one be happy, and content most times. Not wanting anything more. Not having to be angry at shit anymore? 

On our own we can't. We can try to excel in things to really differentiate ourselves. To prove our worth,  but that doesn't work either. You still won't be content. Our hearts are not perfect. Not made for feeling content. Too much stuff in the World.  So much to see, so much to distract us. For you to live your best life, you had to go another route. You weren't willing.

So now you are the grownups in IT. We only remember the kids, cuz they dealt with the impossible truth.

I had no idea about the impossible truth. It kinda got shoved down my throat. I couldn't tell anyone, cuz they would think me bonkers.

At some point the story opened up. I think  during the wait at some point. My story opened up, but I could not open your eyes. That is not in my power.

Where do we go from here?  Not really sure. Me, and you are different. I can't bridge the gap. You cannot be part of the Loser' s club. 

I kinda have to battle IT one more time. 3 times total is my path. I do it solo,  but with help. After overcoming twice already I have no more fear. I may be scared as the time approaches,  but not right now.

Right now I have my day to day. Today is a day off too. I am going to like my new schedule. For one I can plan on mixing with no down day of Monday anymore. Coming up on the busy season I think that will be good.

Anyhoo, I spose.

It's light out, so I guess I can't run in my pajama bottoms today.   :)

Laterzzzzzz.         :)

xoxo.          :)

xxoo.       :)

Byeeeeeee.          :)))