Tuesday, November 30, 2010


I have no idea what to put for my title, and I have no idea what the heck I am going to write, so there is my title.  :)

Hold on, going to get my next cup of coffee, and I have some good news as to where this blog starts.  :)

Well, I am going to start with my workout.  I feel the blood flowing to this body.  I want to get stuff done-work out wise.  So I rode my bike to work and back yesterday.  I am a little out of biking shape in a couple ways.  One was I was winded.  That feels good.  By the time April hits I pretty much don't even consider my bike to work and back a workout, because it is nothing.  Yesterday it was definitely a bit of a workout.  When I got home, I decided I was tired.  Well, my body decided I was tired.  :)  It was my 2nd day after push ups and pull ups.  I was not my normal 2nd day after super sore, I was already into recovery.  So I did 3 sets of 10 push ups and 3 sets of 5 pull ups.  Pretty much just as an active recovery. 

That was my workout for yesterday.  I know it isn't much, but I am getting back in the swing, and that feels good.  Jerry and I are going to get a bit of a run in tonight.  They have a parade downtown, so we will just do it around my house.  Tuesday night running for me is really a sacrifice.  Tuesday is cheap growler fill up, and the girl who reminds me of Gina always works as a bartender early.  Oh well.  :)  By the way I tip way better than Pete Hoekstra our former Congressional Representative.  She said he is a bad tipper. :)   Oh hey something about this girl too.  When I was in the last Tuesday I was in, we were talking about all kinds of things.  I was talking how Hoekstra would go into DeBoer bros. Bakery, as Old Jake, and Pete were friends from 1000 years ago, although different politically.  Old Jake reads the New York Times, and Pete probably watches Fox News... if you know what I mean.  :)  You know my Left wing ways are totally New York Times, but to each their own.  Old Jake and Pete at least can talk about things like friends, you don't find that these days anymore.  A shame.  Stuff could probably get done if people would just stop being jerks to each other.  Oh well.  You would think the #1 priority would be to help the people.  Help the constituents not score meaningless political points.  Not that I am really paying that much attention anymore.  :) 

Shit, anyway what I was going to say is Jacob and Steph's wedding was at her parents house.  It overlooked a pond or something.  So she knows Jacob and Mitch, and Sam a bit less so.  I saw Sam's wife/fiancee in the store yesterday too.  Holland is a small big town.  :)

So here are some things I am excited about.  I am back in training.  I am training for a marathon.  Jerry and I are running tonight.  I plan on doing my 6 mile route.  Jerry is going to give us a quote for a plumbing project.  We get like $460 Menards money for X-mas, so I plan on paying him with gift cards.  quote price + $20.  I am a good tipper.  :)

Lisa has got us set up to be pretty close out of non house debt by the end of February.  We may have a little left, but not too much.  The light is at the end of the tunnel.  As the banking fiasco went on Capital One tried to raise my interest rate, and said I could cancel to not let it happen.  I canceled that card, and called up the bank for my other  active card, and canceled that right away, even though there wasn't much of a balance.  I don't want you to think I am all clever, and all perfect, because I don't remember the last time I made a payment to my Capital One card.  :)  So I guess they want their $4800, and they will get it.  :) 

As a promise to you, I will never take out another loan from a bank again.  John Q who sold us our house is in the same frame of mind.  I cannot afford Health Insurance, and all the other shit I have to pay, and I cannot afford credit cards.  Make due with less.  Sometimes it is not working more, but spending- or not spending I guess I should say- smarter.  At least for Lisa and I in our limited means.  :)  We don't want to get rich, we just want to live our lives, and we do a pretty darn good job of that.  We have fun, smile, and laugh every day I'd say. 

Well anyway guess I just went off for a bit.  :)

That is it for today!!  :)

Thanks for reading!!!   :)

Hope Everyone has a Great and Awesome Day!!!  :)

xo's!!!   :)

Love You All!!  :)

p.s. some of you are pretty strange.  :)   Ha Ha  j/k  :)

Now for really really cya cya cya.  :)


Monday, November 29, 2010

Lisa Noticed A Change!!

I would imagine via my blogging you may noticed a change in me.  Now I say some weird things on this thing, and I have my thoughts.  Do I share?  We'll see.  I know it will sound strange if I tell you them, and I know it may make me seem weird.  I may, and I may not.  I have two things I thought about, but didn't really say before.  One has to do with Jackie, and one has to do with bonking at my Marathon.  I may come back to that.  It will sound crazy, but I bet interesting.  :)

So yesterday was another productive day.  I woke up early, because I went to bed early.  I don't know if you know this, but I did my blog thing I like to do.  :)  Then I get a tweet about a certain Jeff S. going to I-Hop.  hmmmm.  it has been a while.  So I figure I got time to get a quick run in.  I wanted to run before breakfast, because I didn't want to eat, come home, get a run in, grocery shop. etc... etc... etc...  So I decided to do my 3.13 mile route.  It ended up being at 8:48 pace, and there was no lung burning.  I figure I will get most of the out of shapeness out of me pretty quickly. 

My idea of getting my run in worked out great, because while at I-Hop I found out the Electrical Dept. could use some help, so I decided to work for 3 hours.  Yes people were a bit shocked to see me there with work clothes on a Sunday.  :)  Everyone sure didn't look very chipper to be working.  :)  I put in my 3 hours, and went home. 

I did some more stuff around the house.  Lisa was doing some cleaning, and she had the lazy ones do some work too.  Got rid of a lot of books.  They returned the pop bottles, and did the grocery shopping.  Breeze way is emptied out.  Shit is starting to get done now.  Pretty exciting. 

I hooked up my bike to my trainer.  I even rode it for 30 minutes.  I already see value in it.  I know it isn't the most exciting thing to do, but I forgot how much of a sweat fest it is.  I can get my heart rate up on that thing too.  I was getting winded when I rode hard.  I may learn to like that sucker.  Plus it helps get excess weight I might have put on from my lackluster November.  If a Pejchl isn't active he gets... um.... big.  At least me and my brothers, and Dad.  Not that I gained a ton, but I got a little belly going.  :)  I haven't weighed myself, not even sure where the scale is.  I should just to get a baseline.  A starting point I guess. 

Want to know the crazy stuff?  When I bonk I think about the mirror.  Marathon bonk people not using the mirror?  I wondered about that.  I wondered if others thought about that.  So that is one thing.  I tell you for the heck of it.  I don't think it matters, because all that will be done will be done.  Everyone seems better now too... in a weird way.  I don't understand that at all. 

Now you all know I knew something was going to happen this fall.  I mean shit I've known it for a while.  Now I thought it was going to be this one thing.  To be honest, I am glad that one thing didn't happen, because I get to train, and live life, and run marathons, and races, and get this shit organized.  I know you have no idea what I am talking about, but putting it down anyway.  Coupled with that do you remember me helping move Jackie??  Remember I said all sadness has to be accounted for.  There is no way in hell Jackie would be strong enough to deal with her shit.  She is just waiting to die, and has been for a while, even when things were reversible.  I sometimes take that shit from people.  Not because I am strong really, but the help I have is.  Did you think of that at all??  I wondered about that. 

Crazy Crazy I know, but I know it is the truth. 

I don't know what is next to be honest, just living day to day.  Happy to be back training, oh and gonna ride my bike to work again, because the snow hasn't dropped yet.  I stopped riding, because wasn't really training for anything. 

The one thing I can say about the crazy stuff I write is when I am at work I am still the same.  These are thoughts etc...  I am still the same person at work.  I joke around, have fun, and still get my work done.  At least the shit I think is important.  Our company has some real weirdos who come up with some really stupid ass shit.  They outsmart themselves on a daily basis.  Stupid Fuckers!!!   :)

That is it for today!!!   :)

Thanks for reading!!!   :)

Hope Everyone has a Great and Awesome Day!!!   :)

xo's!!!   :)

Love You All!!!   :)

p.s.  I don't think the Bears are all that great, but 8-3 is 8-3.  We have a tough schedule down the stretch, but maybe Martz and the offense is starting to click.  Defense will always be pretty good.  Hester, and Knox are Hester and Knox.  Special teams is always dangerous. 

Now for really really cya cya cya

p.p.s  I used alcohol and a q-tip to clean the contacts on the thermostat.  Thermostat works like a charm.  When I changed the batteries it still said lo-battery.  Woo Hoo!!  It is a programmable one, so I turn the temps down when Lisa and I are gone, and when we sleep.  :)

Sunday, November 28, 2010

Productive Day Followed With Beer!!! :)

Well I had a productive day yesterday.  Be warned here, I think I may have a lot on my mind, so this could be long.  You have been warned.  :)

First off I was tired Friday, so after work, I did some stuff around the house.  I was pretty productive for a Friday night.  Lisa and I have been eating lunch on Fridays so I haven't been too too productive on Fridays.  This Friday was different so I got a ton of stuff done around the house, and was in bed by 7:30.  I wanted to read my book, but couldn't keep my eyes open.

So anyway falling asleep so early = wake up early Saturday.  So I do my blog thing... which I love doing.  This is totally totally one of my favorite things to do.  Can you tell?   :) lol.   I then start some laundry, and start my morning workout.  My morning workout consisted of 5 sets of 10 push ups.  Kinda starting from scratch, so not a lot, and I am sore.  Give me a couple of weeks, and I won't be sore, and I'll get my reps up.  I could have done more, but you know me, I don't like to always bust it.  Keeps everything fresh... maybe??  I dunno, but I like things to be challenging, but not always.  Some days you just won't have the energy, and you still want your normal workout to be able to get done.  That is my way of thinking anyway.  You can always always add harder stuff on good days or whatever.  I stay flexible with what I want to do, and what I end up doing.  Oh dear this is going to be a long long long entry.  :)

I also got back to doing pull ups.  I ended up doing 4 sets of 5 , and 1 set of 4 of those.  That last set, the 5th was not going to happen.  :)  I think you know what I mean there.  :)  Then I got my run on.  Now I was planning on doing an 8 mile loop.  I cut that short, because well,  I am out of shape.  I had that lung burning out of shape feeling.  Nothing major, but I will need a week or so to get back into longer running shape.  Legs feel good today though, so I will get another run in today.  Probably a 4 miler.  Yesterday I ended up going 5.45 miles @ 9:35 pace.  Harder than I imagined.  All in all though it feels good to be back at it.  I have a desire to do more and more again.  I think that bodes well for a good winter of training.  Oh, and pretty much decided to sign up for the Bayshore Marathon.  No initial goals.  I'd like to break 4 hours again.  Can I get down to 3:30-3:40??  Who knows?  I will train and do my best, how's that??  :)

So goals this upcoming year are Spring and Fall Marathon.  For a person with my limited skills that is an accomplishment in itself.  I would like to run the Riverbank 25 K for the 6th year in a row.  I want to find a half marathon to actually race all out.  See what I can do at that distance.  Remember I only marathon paced those suckers before, and that is what my p.r. is.  Also improve upon my 5K time.  Other than that we'll see.  I am excited to have another year of running to do though.  You have no idea.  Well, you who race know.  :)  You got the bug worse than me.  :)

That is that.  Oh yesterday I cleaned the kitchen, did more laundry, changed the oil in the vehicles...  what else??  Organized some stuff, paid some bills, took a little nap.  By 3:00 I was beat.  Of course I was up for 12 hours at that point going pretty much non-stop less my nap.  So if you wake up at 7:00 am, that equates to 7:00 pm. 

So I decided to go to New Holland and fill my growler.  I usually have a couple of beers, and fill it up.  It was fun.  I saw the girl I have a crush on.  She has straight blond hair.  She reminds me of Gina.  I sat next to her husband.  I didn't know it was her husband, til after her shift.  I should get to know her name, because we are always like "oh hi"  :)  I also saw the bartender I had a crush on last summer.  :)  She recognized me too.  Maybe because I complimented her on Halloween.  I told her she looked great.  :)  I am such a slut.  :)  lol.

There was some dude there talking my ear off.  I don't mind a good conversation, but he was talking about beer.  That was it beer and microbrews, and pubs that sell microbrews.  Are you kidding??  SHEESH!!  I buried my head in my phone to shut him up.  He got the hint.  :)  I mean who can talk about beer for 30 minutes straight??  Beer is to talk about interesting things.  Races, politics, philosophy, life, hopes, fears, dreams, everything... just not beer.  :)  lol

So that is that.  Today like I said I am going to get a run, grocery shopping, and some more stuff around the house.  Get my trainer hooked up too.  :)

I have more, but guess I'll stop at that.

So guess that is it for today!!!   :)

Thanks for reading!!!   :)

Hope Everyone has a Great and Awesome Day!!!   :)

xo's!!!   :)

Love You All!!!   :)

p.s. the Chicago Bulls are pretty dang good this year.  Watch out for  them!!  :)

now for really really cya cya cya!!!   :)

p.p.s.  My mom is on a trip to the South freaking Pole!!  Bundle up.  :)

Saturday, November 27, 2010

A Look Back

I am walking in a new area now.  I am confused, I have no idea what the heck I am doing, as in what does my life mean, or what is my purpose?  So I look back to my start... at least my start with blogging.  So I did this heimleblog thing for a while, and deleted it.  Now that had to be sometime near my Marathon P.R.  Before actually, because I did not blog about that race.  It was only a p.s. to last Thanksgivings 5K p.r.  I wanted to blog, but felt... God who knows.  It was a hard time for me that is for sure.  When I got back to blogging, and actually showed people I was scared to do it.  Then there was the Journey that also got deleted.  Although I got back up pretty quickly after that one, because I knew good was done.  Almost right away. 

Now I have no idea how the last couple weeks look.  I quit blogging, I quit racing, I quit training, and I think I am going to suffer. Now I step back up, and I start blogging again... with the same blog name.  :)  Nothing deleted.  :)   (How crazy is that deleting to people who aren't me??  )  lol.  I can get back to training.  Maybe with a better winter planned than last year, because maybe I lost some hunger.  Maybe I wanted it to always be fun, and never have it be hard.  My training during heimleblog was the best.  It was always fun, and last winter, and summer things were more like work.  All but the running.  Maybe because heimleblog cross training wasn't cross training, but actually actual training for tri's I was going to do, but never materialized.

Well if something gets taken away, and you get it back maybe you appreciate it more.  I can train again.  Maybe now that will give me a bit more hunger.  A bit more desire to improve more.  I have a lot of work, because I haven't run much, but I was injured anyway, and wasn't going to be running much.  Maybe now I can spend more time doing the little things I used to do.  Push ups, pull ups.  biking.  walking.  Being a little more active.  Helping out with the house more, and stuff like that.  Getting this life organized.  I used to be organized btw, but there are only so many hours in the day, and there is always so much on my mind.  It made it hard, but now everything seems new and exciting, and worth working toward.  Training, a better more organized home life.  Lisa and me working together with the household stuff.  Us both taking an active interest. 

Well, I am just thinking aloud so to speak.  I picked up another book from the library.  It is from Haruki Murakami.  "Sputnik Sweetheart"  I only read one of his books.  It was good.  If you want to search through fiction to find the truth, he seems to be a good author to do that.  :) 

That is it for today!!!   :)

Thanks for reading!!!   :)

Hope everyone has a great and awesome day!!!   :)

xo's!!!   :)

Love You All!!!  :)

p.s.  Going running today, but first some push ups and pull ups.  Not many though... it has been a while.  :)

Now for really really cya cya cya!!!   :)

p.p.s  I went to bed at 7:30 last night.  That is why I am up so early today.  :)

Friday, November 26, 2010

Back To The Old Drawing Board!!

Well, I had everything figured out.  I knew something had to be done since 1992.  I thought it was done.  I look at my life for clues.  What does it mean to me.  My life means more to me than getting a paycheck, and working.  I really thought something was going to happen.  Guess what??  Something did, but not what I thought.

So what does that mean for me?  It means I need to keep on living life.  I lived this whole summer like my life was going to be over in a way.  Well, I am still here just as I started.  So now what? 

Well, here is what.  I have no idea what my future holds, and I have no idea what your life means to you.  I am as lost as can be.  I have absolutely no idea what the heck I am doing.  So what do I do?  I do the only thing I can do.  I live life.  For me that means back training.  That means trying to make sense of Lisa and my life.  This journey, I thought was over still goes on. 

I'll tell you a little bit about my race.  The little boy was there alone.  Anyone who runs races would be thrilled to win a race.  I was sad, and I was alone.  So this show goes on.  That means I start training again.  As far as I know that means Riverbank 25K, Bayshore Marathon??  perhaps....  Fall Marathon.  Running Group, track.  Hills, snow, outside running, and maybe even push ups again, and that blasted trainer.  That also means me doing my job at work.  I may have to kick some ass.  :)

That means my life goes on.  I thought I was this butterfly that was going to die, but this butterfly has a longer life than most.  Why???  Because with God all is possible, so this butterfly gets to live on.  I guess I will wear this colorful jacket for a bit more, and for some more races. 

So through all the bad I do, which I do plenty.  I can be a dick, good can still come out of it.  At least I get to train again... starting tomorrow.  :)  I am freaking tired right now.

If anyone worried about me I am sorry.  I am honest and open with my thoughts on here.  If I am blue, or happy I let it out.  I try not to say scary stuff, but life sometimes is scary. 

So I guess this crazy ass blog that this crazy ass person writes, lives on.  I got some blogging to do, usually early mornings, and I got me some training to do.  I gots me some races to run, and a sub: 22:00 5K to get next spring. 

I really thought I ran my last race.  Nope!!  I am happy about that. 

One thing I did learn about myself is if I think my life as I know it is ending.  I pretty much do the same crap.  :)  Basically be a moron.  :)

That is it for today!!!   :)

Thanks for reading!!!  :)

Hope Everyone has and is having a great and awesome day!!!  :)

xo's!!!   :)

Love You All!!!  :)

p.s. I hope none of you are mad at me, cause I seriously seriously only tell what I feel here, and what I think.  No matter how looney!!  :)

now for really really cya cya cya!!!   :)

Thursday, November 25, 2010

Last Night I Won A Race

It was not one I run.  My leap of faith was me being led, and sticking out my chest at the finish line.  Yes it was a vision, and I see a little boy in a place no one can go.

I did get a little input at work from Cory S. and Jeff S.  So I know you know what I am talking about.  To put your heart at ease I will tell you a couple things.  Perhaps a list!!  :)

  1. It will start at work tomorrow. 
  2. Everyone will see.
  3. I will be bed-ridden.
  4. I know not the time.
  5. I don't know how bad.
  6. I know pretty bad.
  7. I am not afraid.
  8. Thank you bloggers.
  9. It will go well for all you on my right hand side.  "all"
  10. Many others too.
  11. I will be bestowed with an honor.
  12. The one who ran my race will  bestow me with the honor, but all honor goes to him.
  13. He was the one who overcame.
  14. It will be a good night for me.

That is it for today!!

Thanks for reading!!  :)

Hope Everyone is enjoying their Thanksgiving!!  :)

Having an awesome one if you will.  :)

I don't even remember what I always wrote it has been so long since I have blogged.  :)  lol

Love You All!!  :)

p.s.  Everything has been done for a reason.  so no worries!!   :)

Now for really really cya cya cya!!!   :)

Friday, November 19, 2010

Not Much Left

For those who read this blog, just want to drop you a line.  This blog is over.  I may not have anymore updates left. I don't want to make it sound morbid or anything, cause it is not.  Whatever the reasons I blogged for the last however long is done.  The work is done, although it really wasn't work, cause I loved it.

I would like to thank all of you for reading!!  :)

I really appreciate it!!   :)

I am writing this, cause, well I update almost every day, and now I won't be.  :)

now back to my regularly scheduled coffee.  :)

Special thanks to Beth and Maija who put me on their right hand side.  What an honor!!!   :)

Now for really really cya cya cya!!!   :)

p.s.  This one was much easier than the other two.  :)  I didn't even delete!!  :)  

oh yeah,  xo's!!!  :)

Love you all, and all that other stuff too.  :)

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

A Day To Myself

Monday??  Weekend Over??  All Around Not great mood??  All these contribute to a Day to myself??  Perhaps,  who knows??  I was to myself though.  I did get a run in.  I was going on my 4.2 mile loop, but had to cut it short due to bathroom issues finding their way from one area to another.  I decided to do the smart thing, and head home.  :)  I didn't map it out, but I assume  3.4-3.45 @ 29:45.  I have no idea what that is.  Don't really care, I am not training for anything, but it felt good to be out running again.  I almost thought about yelling out from the top of my lungs "I RAN AGAIN", but even decided against that.  Like I said a day to myself. 

We moved Lisa's mom out yesterday.  I worked as I do most things.  As quick as possible getting the boxes in her new room.  I don't fuck around, I just get the work done.  At least when it comes to things like that.  We got everything moved but her chair.  I went to a bar by myself.  Not my typical Monday deal btw, but I didn't particularly want to go home, and I wanted to be by myself.  Ummm btw... there were way more people drinking on a Monday than I expected.  wtf??  I mean having a drink fine, but this seemed like the norm for these people.  Eat out, and have drinks on a Monday.  SHEESH!!  I like a drink sure, but man, that surprised me.  Maybe people are lonely, and want company.  There were couples though.  I don't know, it seemed weird to me.

Anyway that is the end of a story kinda.  My life with Jackie is over.  I thought about it, and for once felt sad for her.  I mean she has a nice big window, but she is alone.  I know Lisa will visit her, and Hailey, and maybe even Kevin.  I won't... probably.  I do feel sorry for her though.  I knew her direction.  I have known it for a long time.  It wasn't a positive direction, and you know, that lifestyle leads to one thing, and one thing only.  Sadness.  Maybe all lifestyles lead to sadness.  Maybe that is one of life's answers.  We can do everything by the book, but you know we will still be sad.  People die, people are alone sometimes.  Maybe we are lonely sometimes.  Does anyone really understand you??  Maybe if Jackie opened up to her family, they could understand her better.  I see this old lady, well not really old.  65 year old lady, who is like 95 health wise.  She has her big window to look out.  She has her t.v.  She has some movies, and all this knick knack shit.  Fuck, that is sad to me. 

I saw a lady there who was skinny, got around pretty well, and was living there.  No family??  That seems weird to me too, that family wouldn't take her in if they had the ability.  I mean that is a sad looking place to live.  Maybe people are selfish.  I know I am, I knew I was. 

Want to know my frustration with Jackie??  We took her in.  She would have to pay some rent.  It basically came down to like 25% of her income.  When disability ran out we cut her rent even more.  She went from not being afford to paying any bills to only having that one.  We told her to cook some meals sometime too.  We can all share in that right?  Well that didn't materialize.  She cooked very few meals.  We somehow were in charge of all her dinners.  SHEESH!!  Didn't know I signed up for that.  I told her WOW!!  your life is unstressful now, you can do whatever.  My first thought was write a book.  I mean she was 50-whatever at the time, why not write a book so your family can at least know you in that way right?  I was basically talking to a wall.  OMG, she had no motivation for anything.  I never knew that existed.  I always think people will figure it out.  I always hope for the best.  She did less and less day over day, and year over year.  What have I tried to do??  More and more year over year. 

So I don't understand her.  At this point I don't even want to.  She probably has stuff from her life she buried, and did not look at.  So she ate, was lazy, and felt the victim.  Well, you know we all are victims.  We all are living lives, and none of ours are perfect, but we can still try at shit right?  I mean I didn't bring my A game at work yesterday, but doesn't mean it won't be here today.  I was a little out of it yesterday, but the fire is burning today.  Ready to get at it.  I was joking with Lisa yesterday, well everybody at work.  I told them I was saving the world.  One inventory at a time.  :)  In all things pertaining to world importance my job is as stupid as most others.  I still try though... most of the time.  Yesterday, I just went through the motions, but today will be better. 

So anyway a chapter in my life is done.  I am sad for Jackie.  It could have been better for her.  I mean she had the power to make things better.  Anne Frank was a victim.  As much as anyone else.  She still had bright days.  She still was introspective.  She still was honest with herself.  She was scared.  She was growing up in bad conditions.  I know I know why do I always bring up Anne Frank??  One reason and one reason only.  She impressed me. 

That is it for today!!!   :)

Thanks for reading!!!   :)

Hope Everyone has a Great and Awesome Day!!!   :)

xo's!!!   :)

Love You All!!!   :)

p.s.  Once again the p.s. is just so I can write this:

now for really really cya cya cya!!!   :)

Monday, November 15, 2010

Movie Day!!!

Okay, so yesterday I just wanted to go out and see a movie.  There really weren't any good ones that I saw, so I decided to see "The Hereafter" with Lisa.  It was o.k.  Nothing great, but there really isn't anything great out at the Theaters right now, so we had to pick from what was available.  The only other one was "RED"  I think that was the name of it, but hasn't the Cold War been done to death already??  I mean I read a ton of Clancy, and a ton of Ludlum, and others not to mention all the non-fiction.  It did make me think of Stalin for yesterday's blog though.  :)  Yeah that paranoid dude killed millions of his own countrymen, because he thought they were a threat to his power.  Now no country is going to be better, or get better if it kills it's brightest people.  He ended up killing his most talented people.  Faith is also seeing a direction.  If you see something like that happen you know it isn't going to end up anywhere good.  You see someone instilling anger in people, you know that isn't going to lead to peace. 

I watched "Mulan" finally.  I liked it.  It made me think of daughters and their relationships with their Dads.  I have enough experience with girlfriends, and friends who were girls to know those are not always perfect.  I have had girlfriends and friends who were  girls who tried so hard to get their father to notice, but you know Fathers are not perfect.  They have their own lives, and they live them too.  My most vivid experience is with my post-hospital girlfriend Natalie.  She worked so hard, and was so quietly trying to get her father to notice, but it didn't work.  He had too much stuff going in his life.  She liked me, because she saw I was quiet, I barely talked to anyone after the hospital.  We became friends, I started biking, and we accidentally became more than friends.  I think I hurt her, but didn't think I would, or could, because I didn't think she really cared, but I was hurting when she was gone.  I thought about her all the time.  She was in Denmark, and I was in Normal.  When she got back, and I was feeling better, I treated her badly.  If I could do it all over again I would not have hurt her, but we don't always see what we do.  One thing I do know is we were definitely not meant to be together.  Why??? who knows, but I am here in Holland, and this stuff is being done for a reason. 

Even Katrina had issues with her Dad, and I won't go into that, but it wrecked a marriage, a relationship, and I hurt Katrina too on top of the stuff she had going.  WOAH!!  What a dick I am huh??  SHEESH, I hurt a lot of people come to think of it... here and there.

The best movie I saw yesterday is one we rented.  It is with John Travolta, and Scarlett Johannson.  It is a pretty darn good movie, with a good story.  The name of it was "A Love Song For Bobby Long"  Now that was some real life stuff.  These people were imperfect as they come.  Their lives were imperfect, but through all their bad they found redemption through... I guess being honest.  Being honest with themselves, with each other, and also finding out the truth about their lives.  Travolta was an old retired English Professor, so there were all these awesome Literature quotes he used too.  I totally totally recommend you see that one.  It is good.

I also saw "No Country For Old Men"   I forgot I saw that, but it is still good.  What a freak that dude was.  No reason for me to watch all the movies yesterday, but I like to be inspired.  I like to view things, and think about them.  Sometimes movies are good for that. 

In other news Jackie moves out today.  She has so much useless bullshit.  omg  That is her life.  The accumulation of knick knack bullshit.  Annoying all the people she cared about, which basically boils down to a handful now.  The watching of stupid T.V. shows.  Not a thing inspired her in her life.  Nothing made her get up in the morning, and strive for something.  Just hearing her talk annoys me.  To be honest she annoys everyone else too.  I don't feel bad for her, because most things she did to herself.  Not everyone will understand you.  She has issues I am sure, but FUCK!! 

I had a full day yesterday!!!  :)

But that is it for today... as far as this blog goes!!!   :)

Thanks for reading!!!   :)

Hope Everyone has a Great and Awesome Day!!!   :)

xo's!!!   :)

Love You All!!!  :)

p.s.  It is Monday, and I don't feel like working at the local lumberyard today, but guess I will anyway.   :)

now for really really cya cya cya.   :)

Sunday, November 14, 2010

Oh Dear Is This Going To Be Long!! :)

The Example:

In order for me to graduate College, I had to prove to Illinois State University I could write.  I wrote an essay, which really ended up being a precursor to what I would do.  I was to look at life objectively.  Upbringing and all.  I said I had to, because of the example I used.  If I grew up in a small town in the South.  A racist town of all whites.  I had relatives who were all racist, what would make ME not racist??  Nothing.  I would have to look at life, my upbringing, everything with an objective eye, because, what if things are wrong?

Examples I didn't use.  What if I were a 20 year old German in 1942.  What might I have done??

If I were a KGB agent during Stalin's reign of terror, how many might I have purged?? 

You see you guys have a good set of eyes.  You have to believe what you see, because truth is truth whether good or bad.  Life is life, and a lot of times it is bad.  Look at Anne Frank's life.  What was she 10 or 11, and the rest of her life was in hiding, until they were found out, and she died in the camp.  She is one of my favorite people I have read. 

I see stuff is coming to the surface for you.  You don't want to believe.  You want it to be like the old days, where everything seemed simpler.  Well, those days are done, because we have to do this. 

Look at my timing.  I graduated College in 1990.  My step-Mom died Christmas of 1991.  I was in the hospital of July of 1992.  I looked at it.  I believed, and I did what I did.  You can trust, because look at me.  Am I dishonest?  Did I have fun??  Do I have fun??  I suffered through some stuff for a reason.  I plan on suffering through some more stuff, because I have to.  I am not afraid, because I have one who gives me courage.  I was scared at the end of the Journey, remember I deleted everything, and wanted to hide, because I was being judged constantly as being bad.  I had help overcoming the obstacle.  Now I have help again, and I think you know what I am talking about.

Trust.... I have been through it.  This ain't easy like I said, but whose life has been easy??  Did you want to be one of those Chinese people who ran over the kids in Tienanmen Square?  I know you don't want to believe what you see, but you have to.  You just do. 

That is it for today!!!   :)

Thanks for reading!!!   :)

I know this may be a tough day for you, but stay strong!!!  :)

xo's!!!    :)

Love You All!!!   :)

p.s.  I am going to take Lisa to a movie today.  The Hereafter.   seems interesting.  Hope it is good.  :)

Now for really really cya cya cya!!!   :)

Saturday, November 13, 2010

Turtle Shell mini baskets of the enzyme Microbe.

Oh yeah, gonna be one of them.  So I was going to go into work at 5:00 but decided to sleep a bit more.  I slept til like 4:30.  I was up in time, but was like screw it I am tired.  :)  Go in at 6:00 I think.  I think I only have a few hours left in my project, so that will be cool.  It will be nice to get it done. 

You should check out Sugarleg's last post.  She races like I did.  For fun.  Her and her friends struggled through some stuff, but they trained with a goal in mind.  They had some hard days, but race day was fun.  She does it like I did too.  Beer afterwards, and celebrating.  I am glad they had such a good time, because not all their days were fun. 

I have a feeling some of you are wondering about me.  I got some input yesterday.  You are wondering.  What is going to happen to me??  The answer is there, but not sure if your time is to know it now.  Ever hear that saying keep your enemies close, or something like that??  I sure have done that huh??  I kept them inside of me.  Am I strong??  Or did someone pick me for something.  My spiritual journey I did not ask to do, but kinda I did.  I said if there is some reason I am here let me do that instead of anything else.  Remember??  Holy Crikey I had no idea what it would entail.  I still did it.  I was soooooo scared through a lot of it.  The summer of 1992 was so scary.  Heimleblog was scary, and The Journey.  I loved writing every day, but felt sooo scared after I wrote it.  What would people think?? 

Now we close in on the end of one thing, and the beginning of another.  My end, but also my beginning.  It should be interesting.  What happens after I am not sure.  That will be interesting.  Hey, it isn't my plan though right??  I am just along for the ride.  I have been scooped up to do this thing.  I said I was willing back in 1992.  The time comes near.  How that all unfolds I know not.  It will be interesting.  Some of you will share in what I suffer through.  You are tough though, so you will deal with it fine.  It will be hard, but you do hard stuff.  You live life.  That is hard a lot of times. 

Well, that is it for today!!!   :)

Thanks for reading!!!   :)

Hope Everyone has a Great and Awesome Day!!!   :)

xo's!!!   :)

Love You All!!!   :)

p.s.  gonna send a secret message to N.O.T!!!   :)   I have a lot of tumbelrings to look at from her sis Olga too.  I usually comment on those too.  I think of you all tho.  You see my mind is made like that.  I can think of anyone at anyone time.  I can feel you in my heart too.  :)  pretty neat. 

p.p.s.  I once was rich in spirit, and then most of it was taken away.  It was soooooo scary.  Blessed are those who are poor in spirit tho right??   :)   These are things you will understand.  All but one. 

now for really really cya cya cya.   :)

Thursday, November 11, 2010

Snowdens Of Yesteryear... Better, Worse, or Equal Than Coffee Buffaloes??

Oh, and yes, please show your work.  I'll need more than the answer.  :)

Well, I have a title today at least, but not much more I don't think, so let's just see where this goes.  You know sometimes I am mean too I guess.  I don't like to be.  This blog here is crazy crazy.  You know why??  Well, I know why.  I know what it is.  It is o.k.  Just don't ask me the questions.  That is all.  We can talk about other stuff.

Oh and don't get mad at what I write here.  These are just thoughts.  I have a feeling it hits people in different ways, but they are thoughts.  Our country is founded on being able to write this down.  Think you can do that in China?  So for all the bad this country does, and it does do bad.  Don't doubt it for a second, we do have a Constitution that let's me tell you this country does do bad.  For those religious you know Jesus would have NEVER died for America.  He died for another reason.  At least keep that straight.  o.k.???  

Well, I did not know I was going to be so serious on this thing.  SHEESH!!!  From title to subject who woulda thought??

I would like to congratulate Nancy O'Toole for getting a 100% on a Pathophysiology test.  That is a big big deal.  Know why??  It is a college exam, and I don't even know what the heck Pathophysiology means.  I know more about coffee buffaloes than Pathophysiology.  I am kinda an expert at coffee buffaloes though, so pretty much awesome in that regard.  :)

I really don't have much today to be honest, but I guess I can just go and go and go.  I'll spare you though.  :)

You know none of us are perfect.  I had a good day yesterday.  I looked at leaves that were changing colors.  Most of the leaves on the little tree were off, but the leaves were purple.  Maroonish really.  I liked it.  :)

I saw a pretty red sunrise.  The local lumberyard is good for sunrises.  :)  I saw 3 orange streaks across the blue sky before sunset.  I cried about stuff.  Lisa saw the tears in my eyes.  I think people get a glimpse of my heart when I write stuff.  They get a glimpse of pain, glimpse of joy, glimpse of humor.  I think you can see my heart. 

Why you get mad I don't know.  That is kinda weird to me too.  I know the purpose of this though.  I know the fight you have with yourself.  An internal battle.  I have been through it.  1990 I think.  You want to do good, and be good.  You do, but there is always the other stuff huh?  The stuff we don't want. 

I guess that is it for today!!!   :)

Thanks for reading!!!   :)

Hope Everyone has a Great and Awesome Day!!!   :)

xo's!!!   :)

Love You All!!!   :)

p.s. running party tonight.  Should be fun!!!   :)   I have run my last race. 

now for really really cya cya cya!!!   :)

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Title Should Be The Name Of A Cereal

 SHEESH!!  I got nothing for a title.  :)

Let me get some coffee.  Oh and btw, this is just a winging it blog entry, because I pretty much have nothing on my mind.

You want to know something that irritates me??  When people ask me silly questions.  Small talk questions that can be answered by reading my blog.  I don't small talk.  Keep that shit to yourself.  How irritating.  Really is it that hard to find something out about me??  SHEESH!!  Oh, and obviously I am talking about people who know me, but obviously don't read me.  Truth be told though, I think this is a hard blog to acknowledge is being read.  That is weird to me too.

Maybe I have been doing this for so long.  Remember the start??  The start was biking.  The start was "The Outside Corner"  The start was me blogging on myspace.  Yep I did it back then.  I didn't know that was the start.  I knew the start was the start though pretty soon after I started reading the original 4.  I knew something happened at the funeral.  Dean's funeral, from Lisa's side of the family.  I remember people were talking about who had jobs at the visitation, and I thought about the dead guy.

That was last summer.  The music would take me many times at work, and at home.  Boy I had some hard days.  I don't think you people understand my hard days.  My hard days are me being scared.  Me thinking I am bad.  My hard days are between me and God.  Hard days are being persecuted in my own mind.  It is a blessing.  Do you remember what Beatitude that is??  Yes the hard days were for good.  That is not a normal thing.  All I have endured is for a reason.

SHEESH!!  I just lost the rest of my entry.  That sucks.  

I will just write a few more things here.  One thing I wanted to write about was the race.  I am injured for my all important 5K, because that tells me what?  anyone anyone??  This is not my race to run.  This race will be run for me, because you see it is a gift.  My work is done.  I am along for the ride now, as all of you are too.  Remember the Matrix zone.  When he can do almost anything at will.  That is where this thing is at.  Nothing can touch us.  The speed is anti-speed??  Gravity holds no power over this spiritual race.  Kinda like the speed of light you know??

There is one more thing I need to do.  I have a feeling you may know it won't be pleasant.  I have been willing to do it since before the hospital of 1992.  I did not know how to get there.  I am being taken there.  You are along for the ride to view something.  What it is I know not.  How this comes out I know not.   You will see some crazy things.   

Well well well.  I guess I always have a lot on my mind.  I can write all kinds of things I guess.  I leave you there though... I guess.  :)

That is it for today!!!   :)

Thanks for reading!!!   :)

Hope Everyone has a Great and Awesome Day!!!   :)

xo's!!!   :)

Love You All!!!   :)

p.s. this came out a bit different than what got lost, but whatever.  No biggie.

now for really really cya cya cya.   :)

oh and gonna change my title from "Title" to something else.  My title was originally 'Title"   :)

Tuesday, November 9, 2010

Well Today Seems Like A Good Day!!

I know I know how can anyone know at 3:20 in the morning it is going to be a good day. I feel that way.  I am well rested.  My leg feels pretty good, so perhaps a run in today.  Maybe this morning before work.  :)  I had a feeling this morning that which was missing is here now.  Trust.  What I said previously... the quid pro quo.  Not all trusted, but now they do.  I also had a feeling all is done.  The die is cast... is that the saying??  It seems right, but what the heck does that mean??  The die is cast??  well whatever.  Hope you know what I mean.

Anyway, yesterday I had a pretty productive day outside of work.  Work was work.  I always have more to do than I can possibly get done.  I can also get side-tracked too.  I see stuff I want to fix all the time, but I cannot do it all.  If only everyone was as good as me.  :)   lol  j/k.  :)

After work, I was going to bag up the leaves in the backyard with the lawnmower.  I couldn't get the sucker started.  That sucked.  I swept up the leaves that were on the patio, and brought them to the front.  The city picks up our leaves.  We still have a lot to fall, because, well, it is fall.  That is how it works you see.  :)  More outside time.  Lisa and I cleaned the garage after.  Our garage was a cluster fuck as anyone who has seen it can tell you.  We can now fit the car in the garage.  It is a one stall. 

After we did that I made dinner, and prepped tonight's dinner.  A pot roast in the crock pot.  That means I don't have a damn thing to do today.  Woo Hoo!!  The weather is nice out, so I'd rather do outside stuff, instead of inside stuff.  Inside stuff to me is reading and watching movies.  I want to see Mulan sometime, but will probably wait for a crappy day outside.

I guess if you have a day where you feel ahead of schedule it is a good day.  Students probably never feel that way, but we all do what we can.  Today I am ahead of schedule in my mind, and I am going to enjoy that.  Today is a day I think will be fun.

On that note I am going to go for a run.  Hope the leg is good....after.  That is where I have been having problems.

That is it for today!!!  :)

Thanks for reading!!!   :)

Hope Everyone has a Great and Awesome Day!!!  :)

xo's!!!   :)

Love You All!!!   :)

p.s.  chair cushions made out of porcupine skin should never be invented.

now for really really cya cya cya!!!   :)

p.p.s.  What the hell was I thinking???  I don't have time to run, I have to be at work in an hour and 20 minutes.  Daylight savings has screwed you all up.  :)

Monday, November 8, 2010

Celebrate Celebrate!!

That is what I do.  I celebrate my days as if they were my last.  I have my reasons.  I work,  I get some stuff done around the house usually.  I will run if my leg lets me.  Not sure about today, and just have fun. 

I will just give you a day in the life...yesterday.  I woke up, and I thought I would read, run, and laundry and stuff.  I did none of the above.  When I first walked up the stairs I realized my leg hurt a bit.  Running off, probably running off today too... now that I think of it.  Anyway I putzed around online, did my blog thing, Twitter, etc....  I then took a shower, and took a nap.  I have been enjoying my sleep lately.  :)

I decided to go grocery shopping.  I am the best at it, way better than Lisa.  I get deals, and I usually can get stuff for the whole week +.  Not real exciting, but I did get 10 steaks for a total of .41 cents.  They priced it wrong, and the dude gave it to me.  He asked if I saw it.  "I said yes"   :)   Woo Hoo!!

I put the groceries away, and cleaned the kitchen.  I felt like filling up my growler, so I went to New Holland, had a few beers.  Beau and Charity met up with me later, and we hung for an hour or two.  It was fun.  We are going to go on a brewery tour next weekend.  Should be fun.  I am excited.  I then came home and made dinner, and listened to my new favorite song of the short term period.  That Katy Perry song.  I like a song pretty quickly, listen to it a gazillion times, and then get sick of it.  This song has another day or two max.  :)

That is it.  Dinner was good, I had fun, and then I went to bed. 

I see the Jets won... WOAH!!  When I left I thought they were going to lose.  Congrats to any who might be Jets fans.  :)

That is it for today!!!   :)

Thanks for reading!!!   :)

Hope Everyone has a Great and Awesome Day!!!   :)

xo's!!!   :)

Love You All!!!   :)

p.s. I unfriended people who deleted my posts before.  You are lucky you can be funny...sometimes. 

Now for really really cya cya cya!!   :)

Sunday, November 7, 2010

I Know I Know What the heck???

I really have skipped a lot of blogging days for me.  What the heck??  No reason really.  I overslept one day, and yesterday I really didn't feel like blogging, although I kind of did anyway to a friend.  A friend who her and I have been on a bumpy ride, but now I feel we are like sister and brother.  So really thankful for that.  Another one I think we already cleared the air.  I think maybe at times she is like me too... insecure at times, and needs to hear some things from me once in a while.  So on that side I am pretty happy.

Hold on gotta get some coffee. 

So let me say about that again and again.  I am very thankful for both them.  It wasn't pretty all the time, that is for sure, but we were honest with each other for the most part.  We were ugly to each other at times, but now we.... in my mind.... are like family.   I cannot express how thankful I am for that.  :)

The thing with me skipping blogging is I always have so much to write the next time.  DOH!!!  :)   My friend from work Brian came over and taught Lisa how to use a router.  She wants to make kitchen cabinet doors sometime.  :)  I don't!!   that is fo sho!!

I am going to tell you a bit about Brian.  He is sleeping on the couch right now.... He drank a lot.  I did too I guess, but I fall asleep early, especially when I don't eat a lot... like yesterday.  We hang out like maybe once every couple months or so.... maybe even less.  He has a rough exterior.  He gets angry pretty quickly, but once you get past that he is a real guy.  When we hang out we always seem to hit the real life stuff.  Childhood stuff, hard things that happened in our life.  Things in our life that shaped us for better or worse.  So he is real like that, and I guess I am too.  It is probably why we get along.  One thing he told me unknowingly is people REMEMBER the few times I get mad.  I do get mad, but usually I don't very often.  If I am in a bad mood, I typically keep it to myself.  If I do get mad, and my anger explodes people do remember.  :)  One of my friends Jason remembers when I went off on him like 10 years ago.  He still teases me about that.  Only time I went off on him.  :)

I went on a bit of a run yesterday.  I didn't map it out, but I have a feeling it was like 2.4 miles.. maybe less in 21 minutes.  My lungs burned like I was out of shape.  :)    My leg hurts a bit today too, so that probably means no 5K on Thanksgiving.  That also tells me something else, but I don't think I will say that. 

A lot of you trust me.  Some of you don't.  You'll have to.  Hiding is not security.  Hiding is fear.  Hiding is not strength.  Taking a step is scary, but it is brave.  Some of you who hide hold others back.  This all works together, not apart.  Remember my blog is the wait.  You know my steps I have gone through from childhood on.  Last February my blog switched from the Journey to the Wait.  I am not waiting for me.  ya see.  :)

That is it for today!!!   :)

Thanks for reading!!!   :)

Hope Everyone has a Great and Awesome Day!!!!   :)

xo's!!!   :)

Love You All!!!   :)

p.s. Gina dropped her phone in the toilet.... BOOOOO!!!   no texting???   :(

Now for really really cya cya cya!!!   :)

Friday, November 5, 2010

Got A Bit Of A Run In

I think it went o.k.  It was 3.13 @ 8:43  I think.  Maybe 8:38 I forget.  My leg I think is o.k.  I feel something a bit in my right leg, but now I don't even remember if that was the bad leg or not.  Definitely doing better.  I will not run today, but maybe run long with Jim and Jerry this weekend.  I don't know, I get the feeling Jerry is a check the e-mail very rarely kind of guy, so hope he remembers to e-mail me when they run.  I should probably take some aspirin, but I always forget.  I rarely rarely ever take any pills of any kind.  lucky in that way I guess. 

So I have some thoughts I was thinking of.  Talking to people at work, and stuff.  day to day stuff.  You may or may not know, but Karl Marx had a vision of where pure unadulterated capitalism leads.  The uprising of the masses, although the holders of capital will fight tooth and nail.  Now here is my thought on this.  Capital will always seek cheaper and cheaper labor.  Right now we find this in China.  Contrary to popular belief capital does not do this to make a better life for the cheap labor.  They do it for one thing and one thing only.  To increase capital.  In his books you can interchange capital for money.  Basically the same thing.  Oh and btw, it is a hard read.  I never finished, but I get the gist.  Now if I am correct China is the last cheap labor force.  From what I understand.  We have done South Korea, Japan, Taiwan.  I guess we still use Mexico.  People will eventually get sick of working 13 hour days for basically nothing.  I mean the Germans did that crap to the Jews in WWII.  It is called slave labor.  The holders of capital have dug their own grave so to speak.  The answer isn't unions or anything like that.  The answer is decency.  The holders of capital are more interested in increasing capital, as opposed to improving the human condition. 

Every once in a while a Bill Gates comes along, but very rarely.  Even Warren Buffet wanted the $700 Billion for the bankers.  He was scared.  His life's work he realized was about the accumulation of money.  He realized how fragile that was.  You see he had a good vision as far as investing, but he did not take into consideration the slow evolutionary process of History. 

People will always seek better and better things for their life.  People want their life to be fulfilling, and fun.  They want challenges.  They want to be creative, and do all kinds of fun things.  Those who try to enslave the human spirit will not win in the long run.  It is a losing battle. 

Keep your chin up.  A Diamond does not come about easily.  :)

That is it for today!!!!  :)

Thanks for reading!!!  :)

Hope Everyone has a Great and Awesome Day!!!  :)

xo's!!!  :)

Love You All!!!  :)

p.s. taking my wife out to lunch today.  :)

Now for really really cya cya cya!!!  :)

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

This Is Going To Be The Worst Blog Entry Ever!!

I know it!!

Holy SHEESH!!  I have nothing to write, I don't think.  I don't even know what to start with.  So let's start with the day.  It was voting day.  I didn't vote.  I was under a bit of peer pressure to vote too, but still didn't.  People smarter than me voted, and tried to get me to vote, but I still didn't.  Maybe voting would be more interesting if there weren't polls.  In West Michigan only Republicans get elected.  The white Dutch person is a conservative religious right dude in most cases.  That is how our area has voted forever.  Don't worry a string of Right Wing Presidents got us into the first Depression, and now has us in another doozy.  Our Economy is pumped with fake money right now.  I think it went to the wrong places.  Pump money into the economy for jobs, not to banks who don't lend.  I haven't looked to see who still sits on TARP money, but I know 4 banks basically have a monopoly.  Anti-trust enforcement = competition.  Americans like competition... except in the Business place????   BLEH!!

Competition puts creative people to work to use their minds, and make life fun.  Now people many times are enslaved to their jobs, so the upper 1% can get theirs.  How does one company in an industry buy up another company in the same industry???  How does that help things???   You see, on paper that is against the law, but in real life it isn't.  These are the people you vote into office.  They will do the same thing.   If every company wants to slash payroll payroll payroll.  Who will the spenders be??  2/3 of the economy is consumer driven, and the consumer is not driving much these days.  With good competition people will put all their creative energies to work to make a better and better product.  With little competition the work life is bland.

You want to really really really make this country great???  Make it smarter.  Make Higher Education more accessible to people.  Smarter will equal better in the long run.  You have to have faith in that.  Also smarter in the long run will also equal better citizens.  Now our citizens some believe what they hear on FOX news, and some on other news outlets.  MSNBC last time I watched was almost as bad, but on the other side.  Just because a person is on TV does not make him or her smart.  Well...  I think Marilynn Monroe was probably smart, although I am not sure of anything she ever said.  :)   j/k.   

Well, that was an unintended rant.  SHEESH!!!

BTW the direction of a country whose citizens are more educated is progressive in the long run.  FYI!!  A thought to be pondered.  :)  Faith is a long term belief, not a short term gain.

Remember the building blocks... Diligence, Endurance, Steadfastness, Patience, and Perseverance. 

That is it for today!!!   :)

Thanks for reading!!!   :)

Hope Everyone has a Great and Awesome Day!!!   :)

xo's!!!   :)

Love You All!!   :)

p.s. still didn't run.  I know if I feel something when I walk on concrete at work it won't feel good if I run on pavement or sidewalks.  I am enlightened like that.   :)    We'll see about today.

Now for really really cya cya cya!!!   :)

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

Through Bad Comes Good!!

It is the only way it works, because you see there is only one good.  Not any of us are perfect, so we have to trust through all the bad... which we will all be subject too. Good can come from all, but it is a hard SCARY lesson.  We have to admit our own imperfections, and really only the courageous and tough can do that.  That which doesn't kill us right??  You know how many times in my life I felt nothing but despair despair despair????  One thought always popped up.  You know what??  I am not dead, there is still hope.  That is the gift of life.  Being alive means there is always hope for better days, and another sunrise.  Another night's sleep to start another day, and hopefully with a better perspective than the day before, if that day was hard. We have rainy days like I have said numerous times, but they help us grow, and make us strong.  We need to be strong.  Strong is honest, and strong is open.  You have the ability, and the strength comes from just putting your head down and doing it.  This shit ain't easy.  Okay??  No one said it would be.

Now I think those who read me know the story.  We had a blow up at our house on Sunday.  I just had a bad week, and I was irritable.  I exploded on Hailey's boyfriend.  Really ripped into him, as you all can imagine might be a pretty good ripping.  :)  Hailey and that son of a bitch stood up to me and held their ground.  Pent up frustration found a release in him.  He was strong enough to take it, and I texted Hailey after she said she Fucking hates me again I think.  :)  I said I had a bad week, and took it out on them.  I told them what bugged me, and I also told her "oh and Fuck you for hating me too bitch!!"  as a joke.  I put a smiley and a j/k.  When I got home from work, I shook Jesse's hand, and said bad week.  I also told him he can swear all he wants, because if it pisses Jackie off, then I am all for it.  :)  Hailey hugged me and said she loved me.  We all get along now. 

Gotta trust folks!!   It is the only way it works!!  :)

I may run today.... not sure.   Not sure if the leg is good enough.  I'll just run solo early after work.  There is a beer Marathon thingy, but I am just going to get the run in early, and cook a dinner, and chill.  Oh I brought a lot of my books back to the library too.  I have a lot more.  I could have sold them on Craigslist I bet, but when it comes to being creative making money... I am freaking lazy.  I'd rather just get rid of the crap.  :)  Used book store is closing. 

That is it for today!!!   :)

Thanks for reading!!!   :)

Hope Everyone has a Great and Awesome Day!!!  :)

xo's!!!!    :)

Love You All!!!   :)

p.s. I love coffee in the morning.   :)

now for really really cya cya cya!!!   :)

Monday, November 1, 2010

Ladybugs in Nigeria June 2004 Edition

National Geographic.  I am not going to read it, nope it ain't gonna happen!!  :)  That was my conversation with Brian, Lisa's brother.   I was telling him about shit around here.  How Lisa and I would have a great great life, but we have so many lazy people living with us.  What is an amazing and fun marriage these people put stress on.  Brian doesn't know how we do it.  Lisa went to her best friend's house yesterday just to get away from the fucking people who live here.  Myself included.  btw Brian had 15 years of National Geographics he got rid of.  He was like I read them cover to cover, but I am not going to read them again.  He gave them to the library.  Humpback whales June 2007  not going to read it again.  Fossils found in Ethipia March of 97 nope, it isn't going to happen.  Oh man did I laugh my ass off.  :)

She is about fed up with me.  We had a long talk yesterday.  She told me stuff she was unhappy about, and I told her stuff I wasn't happy about.  I told her I have good in me, and bad.  I am not perfect.  Things I want in this house, are no clutter.  We have too much stuff, I'd be willing to just throw out.  So I guess I am going to start.  I will bring all my books I will never read, and sell them at the used book store, or bring to the library.  I love the library, so that should be a start.  Let's face it I don't normally read books twice.  William Shirer's classic "The Rise and Fall of The Third Reich" I read twice.  Joseph Heller I read multiple times.  I read, "It" twice, although once was enough.  "Anne Frank" I read twice, and that might be about it.  Time to get rid of some stuff.  Drives me bonkers. 

Brian and I were saying about the people who live here, How???  Who thinks that is o.k.??  Whoever grows up, and says I want to do nothing??  Who lives in someone else's house at the generosity of the person, and doesn't offer to lend a helping hand, but is FORCED by Lisa to do shit.  These are not good people.  They got some growing up to do.  Kevin is the sanest one of the lot, and he is up at 6:00am playing video games.  Not even to bed yet.

I deal with shit every day.  I would hope people would have the RESPECT not to add to it. 

I spent $45 getting my phone fixed, and I found out yesterday a friend had what I needed, and I could have got it for free.  Some friends huh??

Also on another note.  I have one picture, and one picture only I keep on my phone.  All the others get deleted pretty quickly.  Obviously I am not a picture guy, I am a word guy.  I showed it to the person who is in it Saturday.  I told him this is the only picture I ever keep.  It was good to see him again. 

That is it for today!!!   :)

Thanks for reading!!!   :)

Hope Everyone...yes Everyone has a Great and Awesome Day!!!  :)

xo's!!!   :)

Love You All!!  :)