Ya Gotta Pass The Time Somehow.

Good morning. How's it going?  Me, I am fine. Yesterday I did have time to see a movie. I pay $20/month to see up to 3 movies/week. I saw Death Day 2. I never would have paid to see the movie, but since it is already paid for why not?  It's as dumb as you can imagine, but ya gotta pass the time somehow. A Tuesday afternoon at 2:00 PM it's fine. I am definitely not a movie snob. It doesn't have to be up for an Oscar for me to watch. The girl who won the Oscar for best leading role was in a horrible movie. She did a great job acting though. I just thought the story was dumb.

So yesterday was a good day. I should check my sleep. I feel I have a lot of energy again,  but maybe not the amount of sleep one would account for such condition.

Today should be pretty good. It is our 20th anniversary so we'll go out to dinner. I don't feel counting years are milestones really. It's just life. When it's over not much of it is important. We've been relatively well off, and we've been poor. We currently are rich for us, but it seems our life isn't much different. We eat the same food pretty much. We don't eat out more than usual.  It could be an age thing. I am 52, so I don't really want to go out much. Home is fine with me.

There really isn't a lot on my mind. My days are pretty easy. I don't have a ton or things to worry about. Maybe no things. I am going to take Hope in a bit. It's fun.  :) To wake up being ready for the day is a good way to live. To know what is expected of me is good. To know I'll work,  and then have down time is a good feeling. I'll have a meal,  and sleep.

The World continues to move in its own direction. It is of no concern to me.  I have a life. A day to day to live. I choose what I pay attention to. I'd rather pay attention to Death Day 2 on a Tuesday then going home to watch tv. I don't read news, and I don't watch it.

You are what you read is what someone coined once. I feel a lot of people are basically a combination of someone else's opinion. They fill themselves with things they consider to be facts, but have no way of knowing for sure

In the end you'll never know you. You are a product of someone else's ideas. Propaganda entered your heart and killed you. You are no more. You are a product of someone else's written or perhaps spoken word.   Me, I don't have time for such stuff. I have work,  eat, and sleep. Down time, and dinners. Movies and books to listen to. Maybe a Juice Newton or Cranberry Pandora station to listen to.

I don't let garbage enter in me. It's why I don't watch the news. It's how I can do this too,  cuz there isn't much to me.

Anyway, I guess I better take Hope.

Laterzzz.     :)

xoxo.    :)

xxoo.    :)

Byeeeee.     :)))

Some Questions Answered.

Good morning. How's it going?  Me, I am fine. First off I went grocery shopping yesterday after my workout. You know how they have Simply Orange, Simply Grapefruit,  Simply Lemonade,  Simply Lime etc..    I found Simply Watermelon.  Game over.  I also found out how I get stuff done when it's warm outside. The wind blew through me yesterday walking in and out from where I work out, and the grocery store. It was cold. I had nothing more to do at 10:00 AM. I wasn't going to go outside and do anything. I had nothing but time, but nothing to do. Dishes and laundry all taken care of. Dinner was marinating.

So I binge watched The Americans,  and binge listened to Pandora.  Then I made dinner with fresh home baked bread. I got rid of my sour sponge,  since it is more of a pain than anything. I like fresh bread, but it's not going to be a hobby of mine. Sour dough is too much work. More than I want to do.

I will have to take Hope today. Good chance I was going to anyway,  but I also have no idea how the sidewalks are. Can I bike or no?

So there. A simple day yesterday, and a simple day planned today. I'll probably watch another episode or two of the Americans. I am only 4 episodes in of season 1, but so far I think I am rooting for the Russians. Much like our President does. ;)  more like the planted family. You root for them. 

What else?  Not much at all. March starts out cold this year. One thing I've noticed this year is the cold doesn't seem to bug me. February is almost over, and I am not sick of the cold. I don't feel like I have that vitamin D deficiency from never being outside. I haven't sun tanned at all either. I don't have the winter blahs I guess.

I really don't have much on my mind. I think I'll finish my coffee, and take Hope. Today I'll work, get home around 2:00 give or take. Make an easy dinner, and sleep.

Nothing too terribly important going on with me. Oh, I did think about a blogger or two who haven't blogged in a while that was in my list. I don't even remember their names.   :)  funny huh? 

I spose,  obviously nothing important going on with me.

Laterzzz.     :)

xoxo.     :)

xxoo.     :)

Byeeeee.       :)))

Up Early On A Monday.

Good morning. How's it going?  Me, I am fine. I have to work out this morning, and that is it. I have nothing significant planned besides that. As a matter of fact I am leaning toward having just a lazy old day. Like maybe binge watch Amazon Prime or something.

Yesterday was okay. I did delete my blog, cuz it was dumber than usual. Maybe it was equally dumb as usual, but I wasn't feeling the publish thing. I finished my book, and started the 2nd one in the series. Got all my Sunday shit done less one load in the dryer that needs to be folded and put away. Then there was work. We got out early. A pretty simple day. Today I have off, and I can be lazy. It's going to be cold for at least a week.

Our anniversary is on Thursday. I don't really give 2 shits about these type of days. Lisa marked it on the calendar since we usually forget. She marked it for the 28th, and we were married on the 27th.  :)  how many years?  It's either 19 or 20 years. I believe both years are the year of rubber, so I'll buy her a rubber band.    ;)  I guess it's on Wednesday now that I look closer.

I googled cool cities in the US to visit in April. Seattle popped up, so we are planning on going there for 5 days. Just for the heck of it. We'll take a day trip one day too. I think it should be a fun getaway. Work starts picking up pretty quickly after that. Tulip time, Memorial Day, school gets out. I'll be busy every day I guess. Thinking about it makes me wonder how I got so much done last year.  I guess just plug along.

I didn't really think of anything important the last couple days. Not a lot on my mind. I wanted the Blackhawks to continue winning, and they are starting to lose games.  I wanted the Bulls to continue losing, and they are starting to win. God I hate  sports.   :)

Really today starts another week. Everyone is doing Monday morning in the cold Midwest. I have the day off, and that makes me feel good.  I love thinking of all the people dreading Monday morning. It makes me feel warm and fuzzy inside. 

Haha.

I got nothing today,  but I feel like hitting publish. 

Laterzzz.     :)

xoxo.     :)

xxoo.     :)

Byeeeee.        :)))

The Weeds From Nolgloth Almost Always Look Like Flowers.

Good morning. How's it going?  Me, I am fine. So yesterday I joined the AMC stubs A list thing. $20/month to see up to 3 movies/ week. If I saw one movie per week it still is worth it. So, I am going to go see more movies. Even the ones I don't particularly feel excited to see,  cuz why not?  I saw a stupid movie. It was animated. Spider Man in the Spider verse or something. The reason I saw it is because it's been playing for months. It's horrible,  but still a good way to pass time.

Other than that not much. We went out for dinner, and I actually stayed up to watch the rest of a college basketball game. Today is a workout day. 

Really life just goes on. Another day here and another day gone. I wake up, and do this thing. Why I don't know. I guess cuz I've done it so long. It's just something I do.

I definitely have a firm grasp of my life. I know me, and I know about my life. I know the true value of things in life.  Not much. Heck I learned the value of just me long ago. One coin exactly the same looking as everyone else. Not special in any way. I also saw a Saint was out of reach. I couldn't make me into the person I wanted to be. I could not change my heart. You cannot either. You have anger and hate in your heart start owning it. Don't hide from it pretending it's not there. All the stupid thoughts in your head like lust and whatever you cannot get rid of. You are an imperfect creature. If you brought people in the World you bought the same type of imperfect creature here. It's something that does need to be dealt with, but you'll find few do. The World has since forever told you to turn a blind eye toward that part of you. 

Dress nice, smile and say hi, stage pictures, whatever. Grade yourself on some type of curve. Your better than a lot of people. So there.

The truth is something that has to be dealt with. It takes courage cuz you'll find you are not the fairest in all the land. Like us all. There are two choices. One is bury your head in the sand. Most do this I gather. The other is take the hard road. The one where (brace yourself) you are not that great. You have issues,  and you'll need to look at the mirror of truth.

In your mind I suspect you have a pic of what seems like a decent person. You play the part with smiles and whatever,  but your heart feels something else.

I know my shortcomings as a person,  so I know yours.  I dealt with that about me. More brutally than maybe I expected,  but I am here. Much further along than you. I knew long ago the World was dirty. I saw long ago I was definitely not that great.

I was given a good set of eyes to see the real me. No Saint here, but I wanted to be better. Somehow I took the path to get there.  Much longer than I thought.

Anyways, I guess I'm just talking out loud kinda.

Gotta run.

Laterzzz.     :)

xoxo.     :)

xxoo.      :)

Byeeeeee.     :)))

A Day In February To Rule Them All.

Good morning. How's it going?  Me, I am fine. Yesterday was okay. I tell you one thing working out can be a grind. After work I did work out. Biked to my old people's gym (that does have a couple cute girls working there who always wear yoga pants. )    :)  got my work out in with upped weights. Rode home in a light rain. It's kinda a grind before you finish work. You keep thinking you still have to work out, but it really ain't no thing to get it in.

I ran my robot,  and that's about it. I slept in a bit today. My early alarm went off,  and I was out. So I slept for a half hour more, and now I seem fine. I am driving today due to rain yesterday. I may see a movie after work too.  I kept thinking this morning I'd take Hope when I got home, but if I see a movie I already put a wrinkle in my plans. I should take her this morning, but it's already past 4:00, and I am not dressed for it.

Then I think I have this pretty good motivation to work out 3 days/week. Maybe I should use some motivation to run more consistently. I could do that after work with Hope.

My work out motivation is I just don't want to skip days. I feel I am getting stronger, and it would just be a shame to lose it. Especially since now it is pretty easy. You just got to get there and do it. I have nothing to run for but the heck of it, but I guess I could still have some sort of purpose. Like maybe a weekly mileage I'd like to hit. Then again just by living I hit a pretty good weekly mileage of steps anyway. On any given day I am approaching 13 miles.

Now that February is ending what do I want out of this year?  Pretty soon I'll be cutting the grass, getting the garden going etc...  we have some outside shit to do. Not as much as last year, but some.

My days will fill up. Work gets busier. Life is busy period I guess. To be happy one must always wake up "on" I think. That i can do. I wonder about the rest of you. I never really feel I cheat any part of my life. I don't do something at the expense of something else cuz my heart is not tied down with any kind of guilt. If one day I do x instead of y I don't care. I move on, and am still pretty cool with my day. I don't seek for balance cuz my heart has no use for it. I am cool any which way. 

What do you hope for in the future?  I don't look toward the future with any yearning. Today is fine with me. My days don't need to get better. Another thing I think is I am happy with my own company. I don't get out a lot,  and I like it. I am not really that sociable,  cuz I kinda like just being with me. I don't have much to talk about cuz I have no hobbies. Just living is good enough for me.

Anyway, I spose.

Til next time.

xoxo.    :)

xxoo.    :)

Laterzzz.      :)

Byeeee.     :)))

What If I Just Laid In Bed Til 5:00 AM?

That's what I thought of. What if?  It kinda seemed like it would be relaxing.  Today is a work out day. It'd be nice to take Hope before work,  also it would be nice to get the home part of my work out done before work too. I take for granted that most days I wake up "on".  I love sleep like anyone, but it really has never been a struggle for me to get up before I had to.  Except for the one year of no energy after the hospital. 

Yesterday I ran Hope before 4:00 AM, and it was like 11°.  I ain't training for anything, and I have no important miles,  but still why?  These days I guess I just like to be ~30,000 steps. I want to take Hope most days, cuz she likes it.  I am just kinda on the outside looking in at myself. Wondering what makes me tick you know? 

One reason I figured is me just laying in bed til 5:00 AM is probably a normal desire, and me getting up early most days for the heck of it is not. Especially since I write this gibberish a lot.

Other than that not much going on with me. Another day. I am pretty sure I went over 30,000 steps yesterday. I got another book. It's good. I listen to books a lot on Saturday, but I may listen throughout the week. I like it. I like the format too. Yesterday I was listening to a book while I was shopping for groceries for dinner. You see? 

Today is a day. I'll be busy. I don't have a ton of responsibilities,  but I still remain busy. I still will have time to relax. I'll have a dinner, and there will be another night of sleep. Tomorrow I'll wake up "on" again,  and the weird thought of staying in bed til 5:00 AM won't run through my head again.  I am pretty lucky to be the way I am. I figure life must be a grind for most folks. I gather that because I know most people don't always wake up "on" 

Like I said. Today is a day.  It should be okay.  I think I'll rest for a half hour before I take Hope. I usually go at 4:00 AM.

Laterzzz.     :)

xoxo.       :)

xxoo.      :)

Byeeeeee.      :)))

The Start To The Week.

The best part of my week is probably no matter what I'll be done with work st 2:00 PM. Sometimes earlier,  and sometimes later, but usually that's the time. One can argue I work early at the expense of sleeping in.   :)   haha haha.

So that has me feeling pretty positive about today already. I finished the last book in my series so I think I'll start another series with the same author. I definitely was entertained. I like series just cuz you get to know the characters. I like mystery suspense stuff too.

Yesterday was a pretty good day. I upped the weights to all my exercises by 10 lbs. There were a few that were pretty hard, and some still not too bad. One exercise I didn't up the weight. I still did 4 sets of 10 with each exercise. It will probably be 6 months or so before I up the weights again if I even do. I got all my house shit done except for the basement. I still have to get to that.  :)  The highlight of my day was buying two pair of shoes. One is for riding my bike to work. I am going to use my old shoes as strictly bakery shoes. Just keep 'em at work. Also I got a pair of slip on shoes. Sketchers with memory foam. Just something comfortable. Just something different from a running shoe or flip flops. I kinda had my eye on them.

So really a pretty successful day. I used my roof rake, and the sun was shining so my roof is clear of icicles. Driving around town I see others aren't as lucky. What a pain in the butt. Just something I'll have to keep on top of.

Not much else besides that. Another day today. Not sure what I'll do for dinner. For some reason I think I want mac and cheese as a side with dinner. Weird craving right?  What else?  Not much. I think I'll search for a book #1 in a series of books. I'll take Hope after too. I think I'll ride my bike to work too. It's been a while. It's been a tough couple weeks for that,  but I think today there is enough snow coverage,  not ice coverage or melted ice/snow grossness. 

Today seems like it should be okay.

Laterzzz.    :)

xoxo.     :)

xxoo.     :)

Byeeeee.        :)))

Pericles, And The Maiden Voyage.

Good morning. How's it going?  Me, I am fine. Yesterday was okay. I got most of my shit done I like to. Work was fine. We got out early, but it is February so. Today i have a day off. It should be okay. Outside of working out not sure what I'll do. I'll have to run the snowblower and stuff.

Other than that not much. I have nothing to really worry about. There really isn't any way I made my life hard. I was kinda led in that way I guess. I am 52, and basically living my golden years kinda. I work, eat, sleep. I can see a movie anytime I want. I can sit and have a beer anytime I want.

I don't have to do any parenting stuff, so I guess that's nice. That seems like a lot of work. Boring work,  and doing shit you'd probably rather not do. The worst thing of being a parent is it don't matter what you do. Kids still have to go through puberty, and deal with that. They'll come out just as imperfect as we all are. You can't change it.

The struggles you have they will have. It is one of those things it "seems" like we are supposed to do. I don't know how bad the World is. How many people are addicted to some type of drug I don't know. I don't know how many people are on antidepressants. I don't know the frustrations and arguments people have in their home life. Just daily arguments about this and that.

Life does kinda lie to us, or maybe just our hearts. We follow our path to happily ever after, but it comes up elusive. I kinda can see a person's frustrations cuz I know how life is. A never ending string of shit we have to do. 

Luckily for me I like doing the shit I do. I don't make a ton of money, but for my lifestyle I make more than enough. So it really is a ton of money.

If the World took a shit and economies collapsed I'd still be fine, cuz we'd just see what happens. My long view of life is I am short on the World.

Also I have the ability to not trust anything in this World.  When it was time for me to drop everything and follow,  that was the easiest thing in the World. Because I was full of fear, and I was poor in Spirit. That was as insecure and terrified as a person can be. Now I am secure,  and don't have fear.

Simple simple. All of you still live in the World. What you are a product of. That's hard I'd imagine. You can never really feel content.

Life is hard. We grow up thinking we have the answers, and it takes a lot of life to learn we don't. At least for me.

I did though. I went the path of learning at the expense of the story I could make myself. Turns out this story is even better.

It wasn't always easy. Fear was my closest friend for a long time. Viewing my inequities before being accepted was hard too.

Anyway, it is way better to be where I stand now.

Laterzzz.     :)

xoxo.     :)

xxoo.    :)

Byeeeee.        :)))

Life Goes On.

Good morning. How's it going?  Me, I am fine. I slept 8-1/2 hours last night. I saw the upside yesterday after work. It was okay. It was one of those movies I wasn't excited to see, even though it looked like it would be good. I've seen most everything else though,  and the time fit.

Not much besides that. Lisa went out to dinner with her friend, and I couldn't think of anything I wanted so I didn't eat. You ever have that where nothing sounds interesting to eat? 

It was a day. Today is another. The days keep coming one after another. I weighed myself yesterday for whatever reason. 168.8. It's a pretty good weight for me I think. I thought of some shit yesterday. About me. Like how do we have these silly thoughts in our head. So dumb. How much of the shit in our head is useless?  I guess most of it as this life isn't any great epic thing we are doing.

We are born here, grow up, persevere through puberty. We do what we think we are "supposed" to do,  and no one lives happily ever after. I don't know how many second guesses happen in people's lives. I have none. No what ifs in my vocabulary. My life is fine. I don't need any epic things to make me feel good. My days are easy. I don't have to prove to anyone that I matter,  cuz this life doesn't. It is just one of trillions of them.

I really got nothing to blog about. It's  a Sunday so I have a few things to get done before work. My typical Sunday. Tomorrow will be a day, and I am not sure what I'll do. It's my day off.

I've been blogging a lot this year. I think every day but Saturday. No reason. I am not writing anything important. I think it has more to do with waking up in time to do it.  Also hitting publish instead of delete.  :)

I got nothing important to say. My insides are kinda whack at times. I mean I usually feel good,  but even still my thoughts aren't saintly thoughts. I know that about myself, and I am not ashamed. Mostly cuz I am open and can be seen. My heart knows it is accepted, so I can look at my inside and be fine with it, even though I know I am not perfect. I hold no guilt you know?  Also I am strong too. People come and people go, and that's fine. I still wake up every day feeling fine.

Others have no say in the equation that is me. My life belongs elsewhere I guess.

I guess I am confident and assured. That's what I'd call it.

Anyway, I got shit to do.

Laterzzz.     :)

xoxo.     :)

xxoo.      :)

Byeeee.     :)))

Nothing Of Importance.

Good morning. How's it going?  Me, I am fine. I did my sleep for 5-1/2 hour trick last night, and wake up before my alarm.  Not really sure how that works. As I was thinking about a title for today's update,  and just thinking about blogging in general I wondered what would I do besides doing this. I am not really sure. I was thinking back to yesterday, and I couldn't think of anything important I did. If yesterday never happened would it even matter? 

I guess I could go back through my life and ask the same question. Did it even matter?  My answer is no. This life here really didn't matter. I am fine with that though. I am fine with me. I am fine with my truth of just being numbered as the sand in the sea.

I know when I was younger I probably wanted to live an epic life. At the very least get a good job, and do marriage and kids,  and all that other stuff we were supposed to do.

My life took another direction when the time for those decisions came to me. When a person finds themself alone in the World, and I really was. I owed no one anything. I wasn't tied to anyone or anything.  I remember I was "supposed" to get a resume together and start working for more than I made at the hospital,  but I didn't want to. I know I tried for a bit to work toward making me the best person I could be. I could labor and stuff,  but it's all the shit we think of and desire even though we don't want to. How do you get rid of that?  How do you only just have saintly thoughts? 

No amount of labor really made me better in that way. That mattered to me too. As I struggled to be a better version of myself I could see clearer in the mirror.  Was I getting worse as a person?  Now that I look back, I am not sure I was worse,  but I saw clearer. I stopped justifying, and hiding from my thoughts I didn't want. I'd say mostly it was just lust probably. It's not easy being a guy. Your thoughts take you one direction when you'd really just like to have all that shit not even be a part of you.

So anyway the mirror showed me the truth. I wanted to be this good person. I had my own ideas of what that would be I guess,  but I was powerless to become that person. I then had a clear vision of the ending a type of person like me would have. A Saint was a type of person with a good ending,  and there was me. I was scared, and repented. The timing of all this isn't clear,  but I am pretty sure the turn was already made, so I assume I already overcame myself.

I remember being pretty low. At that point I think I thought if I worked hard I could become the best in the World at cleaning floors,  my main job at the time. I remember going back to the burbs for weddings and shit. I didn't have great grandiose plans for my future. I cleaned at a hospital,  and I was firmly on the path the turn led me. I had no clue what that would be. There wasn't anything in the World for me, so I was just gonna do what my purpose was. The reason I am here. I was just waiting for whatever that was. One night I was reading a book, and I started having this burning feeling in my neck. For 6 days the voice kept telling me how evil I was. My purpose was to be the worst of the worst. So now I knew I had the worst imaginable ending ever. I prayed fervently to make it so I was never born. If I am evil make two huge pillars to smash me to nothing. 

Life was never so real during the 6 days of this torment. I was lucky if I slept 5-1/2 hours during the whole 6 days. I was lucky if I consumed 5-1/2 calories during this time too.  God,  I was so scared. After those 6 days i was picked up. Found out I was on the good side. I just endured those 6 days for whatever reason. I was made full too, so I thought I was the best a person can be, but I was soon made poor in Spirit, and led into the wilderness.  Every day was hard. Every second I was judged. I learned I am no Saint.  It was powerless for me to be so. I probably ate one meal every two days or so, and doubt I had many nights of sleeping anywhere near 5-1/2 hours.

The Wilderness led to the hospital. I was made to look like a lunatic. With help I overcame. I accepted my path of Damnation if that is my purpose,  and was tied to the bed, as I knew my life would be over before the next day.

I fell asleep,  and most surprising to me I awoke the next day. So that wasn't my purpose. The judges control you when you are handed over to them. My heart was strengthened, and I was given the correct words to say.  If it is God's will.

When I overcame the 2nd time it was worse. I accepted my lot of being the worst of the worst if it is God's will. Unlike the 1st time I knew I did good almost right away. Some of you may remember. That was the end of the Journey. I couldn't be judged anymore. It was too much. Delete the Journey, overcome the 2nd time, and the wait begins.  I have no idea why I called it the wait. It just came to me to call it that, and it sure is the wait huh? 

Anyways I've endured much the eye cannot see. A story only known by one other besides me. The blessing I received right prior to going in the hospital I finally was able to enjoy I guess you can say some 2 decades later. My life became easy. I still have the 3rd time to go.  As you can see that is not fun stuff. I kinda feel like I have help though you know?  The first two times it seemed like it was just me, although I did have help.

I'll really see when the time comes I guess. I know my story is nuts,  but it is the truth. Not my story either. I just wanted to be the best version of myself.  Nothing here for me  in the World, so I just wanted to do whatever the reason I am here to do.

This guy who once was a kid came quite a ways. Kinda got more than I bargained for huh? 

That's okay though,  I am not today who I would have been left to my own devices. I stand not as a Saint, yet with help,  and a promise I can still do good.

Ha!  I kinda wondered what else I'd do if I didn't blog.  

Funny.

Anyway,  I spose. 

Til next time. 

xoxo.   :)

xxoo.     :)

Laterzzz.     :)

Byeee.     :)))

As Expected Yesterday Was Busy.

Good morning. How's it going?  I am fine. I woke up after my alarm clock today. A half hour after,  but my phone was turned off inexplicably. So there was no alarm.  I was having weird dreams too.

Yesterday definitely was busy. We worked late, I had to workout, run the snowblower,  and the roof rake. I threw some hockey puck things on the roof too. Of course I forgot I was going to do my home part of the workouts the morning before work,  so I still had to do that. I got it all done.

I did get 7 hours of sleep again last night. Funny thing about last week was I was sleeping 5-1/2 hours and felt less tired waking up. 7 hours of sleep is probably better for me.  Duh.

Not much else to report here. Another day down,  and another about to begin. I will have time to take Hope this morning, so that's good. I will have to drive today, mostly cuz I have no idea how this afternoon will look. I think this shit will melt,  and there might be rain. It will be nasty probably. I should pick up something to make for dinner. It's Valentine's day and all. I know well enough, or at least I think I do, to not go out to eat tonight. Sorta strange this Valentine's day thing huh?  There are so many things in life just forced down our throats as being a thing. We accept them for no reason too.

You can think of any number of slogans and sentiments just for  being a good citizen. If you look closely enough you can see it really does not make any real sense. It's kinda hard to see, cuz your eyes are glossed over.  You were supposed to believe this stuff for a long time.

Heroes are made from History Writers. Slogans are made up to make us feel we live in a very important age. Country Country über Alles.

There is a lot of BS in the World we were born to have shoved down our throats. There is division everywhere. Our side is right whether it's Country, Religion,  or whatever. It's all wrong.  Your Philosophies you spent so much time fine tuning do not make you any better as a person. The things that float in your head in the end are nonsense, and the impure thoughts that start in your heart really are more telling of your true nature.

The first step in helping yourself is actually looking at yourself. It's not looking toward others with blame and anger. It's dealing with the true you. You will see like I did long ago, I surely was no great being.  Til this day, I am not perfect. Currently I am not the best a person can be, but that is a thing, unknown to all but me probably.

I know how my story goes. Geez I was so far down the path. Having endured so many terrifying things. I wanted security,  cuz living in fear is hard.  Now that I am secure the end game doesn't seem so important. Strange really. I'll still do it, cuz that's my purpose. You cannot stop in the middle.  3 times I must overcome,  and that's what I must do. Of course I don't really overcome. This guy here who once was a little kid is in no way shape or form the type of person who can get as far as I am now, and as far as I must go. I am just a vessel used for a purpose. It's not my story. I am along for the ride.  I just wanted to be a good version of myself.

I had no idea this story would be decades in the making. It's fine though. Yeah I suffered much to get here, but that seems so long ago. Few have walked the Earth feeling as good as I do now. Day after day I wake up,  and everything is okay. 

So strange.  

It's not too shabby I tell you.

Anyways, til next time.

xoxo.    :)

xxoo.    :)

Laterzzz.     :)

Byeee.       :)))

Kinda Like Yesterday.

So today it was hard to wake up early again. Actually I fell back asleep. I slept 7 hours too,  so maybe last week was a fluke. Maybe it's just cuz it is Wintry again. Who knows.  I know I am not getting sick or anything cuz my resting heart rate is low. Not elevated from its norm.  Yesterday was kinda nice for a Wintry day. It was like 30° or so. I took Hope when I got home. The snowflakes got bigger so I ran the snowblower. I also used my roof rake. I ended up with close to 30,000 steps too, so a pretty good day.

Today will be busy too, cuz it's a work out day, and it seems every dish is dirty. I did run the robot yesterday so our floors are clean.

Not much else besides that.  Today is another day in the ledger of my life. It is comforting knowing I am where I am supposed to be. I am not supposed to be better than what I am now. I am known. I don't really have any dark side that isn't known and can't be seen. Inside me is like a light that shows everything. It helps there isn't much to me. The log we are all born with is no longer in me. That which keeps all in the dark is no longer a part of me. It really is good to be me.

We all grow up assuming we are supposed to do certain things, and as it so happens those assumptions end up biting us in the butt. You have no idea how big a problem it is. The wilderness teaches us this problem.  The World is wrong, and doesn't teach us the truth. We are born part of the World, so the odds were always against us. I personally was singled out to break the odds. I definitely needed help in the early 90s to start viewing things different. Life pulled,  and I listened.

I really did want to be the best version of myself. Wow, who knew how impossible,  and how long of a journey that would be. Me being a better person was more important to me than whatever the World had to offer. That too is a stumbling block for folks. As it turns out for me to be the best version of myself I need new insides. Not organs, but spirit.  That now which I am poor in has to be filled,  but in order for that to take place I have to suffer one more time. I am willing, and I am not afraid.  I have help with the courage part, but I may be scared as the time draws near. Not sure though.   Also during this time I will get understanding so all tools will be at my disposal.

It once was vital I get this,  cuz I wanted security, but as you know I already am secure without any of those things. You also know I didn't know that was possible. This story of mine has left me strong. Dependent on no one. I am good on my own. So my days are pretty easy.

I don't 2nd guess.  There are no what ifs in my life. Today is fine.  The days don't need to be any better. My story will eventually be done, but I am patient, cuz I don't need anything. I am just here doing my day to day.

Anyway, I guess that's good.

Til next time.   :)

xoxo.    :)

xxoo.    :)

Laterzzz.     :)

Byeeee.       :)))

Is That Rain, Ice, Or Snow?

I have no idea what it's doing outside. I gotta check the weather, I have a feeling it's a drive day. I had to sleep in too, cuz I was a little tired. After my early alarm, but before my middle alarm.

Yesterday was okay. I got my work out in, did some grocery shopping,  and got a new pair of slippers. I made a new meal in the slow cooker, but only I liked it I think.  It's fun to try new things. I never did get down in the basement. Soon.  I promise.  

So my new week starts. I'd say today starts out much the same as yesterday. I am excited for today. I got stuff to keep me busy. I'll have time to relax, and have a meal. I'll fall asleep sometime, and will probably sleep pretty good.  It's pretty easy being me. I don't have any questions. I don't have much to worry about. I can start each day in a pretty positive mood.

The days aren't difficult. During the heimleblog days I woke up strong every day. The days could be hard though. That is the difference between then and now. Now everything is pretty easy. Never really thought about the difference before.

I have to be honest there isn't much on my mind. I am definitely not pondering the political arguments of the day. I am not pondering how I'll make my mark in the World. I am not anxious about the future.  The days will come. This story eventually gets told, or finished. What is invisible to you now will no longer be. It will be a different time, and I am not even sure in which ways. I don't know how the days will look.

Right now I just live out my day to day. Being born in this World was not your luckiest day. In fact probably the opposite. As Solomon said, better off are those who weren't born.

The World lied to you about that too, but the truth is something people have problems accepting. For any number of reasons I guess.  1. It means you are wrong. I guess that's the main one. It isn't easy being content, cuz one actually has to have the truth within them. We aren't born with it, and we cannot attain it, without help. Without help we fail. We aren't born right, and you haven't gone down that path yet. You weren't willing. So now I don't really know what happens.

It's kinda your story now I guess, and we haven't even really started. I think anyway.  We really aren't currently accomplishing anything. I have my day to day though.

Anyways, I spose. 

Til next time. 

xoxo.    :)

xxoo.    :)

Laterzzz.      :)

Byeeee.    :)))

A Monday In February.

Good morning. How's it going?  I am fine. I have my day off today. Yesterday was fine. I got all my laundry cleaned,  folded, and put away. Plus dishes and stuff, and finished listening to my book.

Today, I don't have much to do. I have to work out. I may look for a recipe in my slow cooker recipe book. May look for a pair of slippers too. I have a pair that is about toast. I may start cleaning, and organizing the tool area in the basement. It's been on our list a while, and not a dent put in the work. Actually it may be worse now.   :)

It's all in a day. I don't know if I ever give myself a turn off day. Today is my day off, and I still got shit to do. I am going to assume that is good for me. I don't always feel great about me after a do nothing day.

Not much else on my mind, except that feeling of having a day off. I don't think it is any different than a day of work. I still look forward to both types of days.

Really not much on my mind. I guess it is comforting to know I am not missing out on life at all. There are no imoortant things to do. Nothing important to see. This isn't really some remarkable place, it's just a place we found ourselves in. Having to live this weird thing called life. All of you currently think you are doing good deeds I suspect. There are no good things to do here though. The World won't change if people don't. People won't change if the World is their master.  You are powerless to change that about you either.

Dead person walking is how we are born in this place. All believe in teachings of a false teacher, cuz that is all there is. Long ago I knew I stumbled onto something different. I had no clue what to do, and I was in the wilderness. Scared, and judged every day. I was mostly spirit at this time so you have no clue what that feels like. I wanted a teacher. Someone who could show me the ropes. Due to a promise I overcame the first time. Due to a promise I survived the heimleblog days. Due to help my heart was made strong enough to overcome the 2nd time. My promise was given to me after I overcame myself. After I overcame the 2nd time I was given another promise. All for good. Meaning I didn't have to be what currently is impossible for me to be. A Saint. The promise says good will be done anyway.

I suspect since this whole thing never really worked out we had to go in the wilderness. So you can learn the futility of all things. The World dresses everything up in bows and ribbons. We hide all our thoughts, lust, envy, jealousy,  anger, and everything else that makes up our less than perfect self. Why?  Everybody's life is goddamn perfect on Instagram.  I assume that, cuz I don't do Instagram. Obviously pics are not my thing. I did it for a while though.

Your life is destined to be a disappointment. The only true way to happiness is the blind way. The one where you give up the story you are trying to create.

Scary yes, cuz the World is your security, and Linus doesn't really want to give up his blanket.

I was able to, cuz I was kinda broken. My life was my own,  I dealt with death, my shortcomings,  and I saw a pretty ugly World that seemed pretty impossible to be clean.  No matter how hard I labored.

Today your life is pretty tangled. It's how we work.  We make more and more webs to trap us even more.  You couldn't go into the wild if you wanted.  Luckily for you that isn't the way to contentment anyway. That has to be done for you. You cannot change your heart. 

Anyhoo, I spose. 

Laterzzz.     :)

xoxo.     :)

xxoo.     :)

Byeeee.    :)))

A February Sunday.

A February Sunday ain't too shabby. Work will be easy, cuz February is slow. I have tomorrow off. I'll do my typical stuff before work so tomorrow will be easy. Right now I am having a cup of coffee.

My thoughts are clear,  and I feel fine. Life can be difficult I suspect if your heart isn't content. Always something to yearn for. Waking up inconsistently has to be a struggle too. One day you feel this way so your day goes one way. One day you feel differently so your day goes another.

So many things ones should do too. Eat clean,  be active,  exercise, be productive,  slow down, relax, not too much though you lazy fucker.   :)

The World and it's busyness stops you from enjoying life. I imagine people feel guilty about stuff on any given day. Did you do enough with the kids?  Did you do enough for you?    In life you want balance, and the heart is the key. If you are content your heart is balanced. Only problem that feeling is impossible to contain. A balanced heart has no use for the World's rules,  and we are born here to be overpowered by the World. You were born here to lose the battle. You never ever were given the tools to overcome. I believe you do have to overcome you, and even that little thing isn't easy.

The World is your home, and it's all you know. You feel secure'ish living here, although never attaining a content heart. Society is your World.  So you try to live within those confines. It's an imperfect entity created by imperfect people,  and run by imperfect people for a people who are imperfect. That is why this World is dirty. It can't be any other way. There are no one teaching a better way either, although I suspect I did for a time. It fell on deaf ears though.

Yesterday after work I saw a movie. The new Liam Niesen one. A short chubby girl sat two seats away. Probably not even 5' tall. Maybe barely 4' who knows. She had a huge tub of popcorn,  and a big coke. She kept placing the popcorn one after another in her mouth. She ate the whole tub in like an hour. How much sodium is that?  It was strange. I kinda marveled at that, but I also wondered how long she was going to live.

I sure as fuck don't eat right all the time,  but my days of eating a tub of popcorn are over. I never eat or drink during a movie. I always have to pee anyway after a movie. It was just something I noticed.

Anyway, today will be a day. I'll finish the book I started, and may start the next in the series. David Baldacci is the author. I like the 2nd book in the series more than the first. I liked the first one a lot too.

So there. 

I'll cya later.    :)

xoxo.    :)

xxoo.   :)

Byeeee.     :)))

Oh, I slept over 9 hours last night.   :)

Now for really really cya cya cya.    :D. Haha, just kidding.  Remember when I used to do that.   :)  funny.

It Is Windy Outside.

Hold On  A sec. I gotta check something.  Okay, I am back. I wanted to check my sleep. I slept 7 hours last night. I checked this week yesterday,  cuz I felt there was an extra pep in my step. A lot of 5-1/2 hour sleep nights with me feeling well rested. So, I did have more energy this week for some reason.  Who knows why that happens. Also on 2nd thought I decided to make a cup of coffee too. For the heck of it.

Yesterday I got my new rims on. They are pretty sweet. Black rims to go with my black truck. Of course Lisa is more excited about that shit than me, but I do like them. Just as exciting to me are the gloves I got. They are warm ones. Found them on a fluke. When I worked at the grocery store I got a pair for free. An employee bought several pairs cheap at a flea market or something. Working in frozen a good pair of warm gloves is a must. These are waterproof,  and my hands don't get cold. Even when biking in cold temps,  so I bought a couple more pairs. Hestra is the name of the company.

Other than that not much. We made pizza last night. It was good. Just another day really. Today is a work out day, and meeting a friend for beers after. I am going to do the home part of the workout before work, just in case I don't feel like doing it after a couple beers. I'll come home, we will do dinner. Probably tacos. I'll crash, and I have work tomorrow,  and a new book to listen to. I may check movies for after work tomorrow too. Just your regular schedule of things I do.

Once again we are at that spot where I let you in on my silly day to day. There seems no purpose to it, but I always wake up feeling I should do this, or I want to do it or something. Strange huh?  For as long as I remember I always woke up before I had to. I used to read a lot during this time, maybe do some cleaning. Now I do this.

At one time I felt there was a point to it perhaps,  but now there isn't much here to my thinking. Perhaps I feel I should kinda turn the switch off, but it doesn't really turn off. I wake up, and do this,  and that's just the way it is.

I know a lot of times I kinda look on the inside, and marvel how good I feel. How at peace towards things I am. My life is easy. I don't stress about much. I feel a person who spends too much time pondering politics just adds anger in their heart. Isn't anger one of the things we'd like to get rid of in ourselves?  Divisiveness is fuel to that fire, and those who spend too much time in that arena make themselves worse people. Doubt people can turn that off though. Year after year people peruse the news looking for the smoking gun that says our side is right, and the other side is wrong. Maybe that switch cannot be turned off either in people.

I use to get white house feeds in my FB. I finally blocked it. I don't want to see that shit. Don't even know why I ever was getting that.  Probably the goddamn Russians put it on my feed.   :)

Anyway, life is short. I am in a pretty good place. A place I didn't make, and one I couldn't make even if I wanted. My heart is pretty good. Free from a lot of the worries normal in just regular living. I have no clue how the gap from me to you gets bridged anymore. I am at a loss for how things go from here. Maybe that is why I have this feeling this thing is really doing nothing, cuz it is of no help to anyone.

I am not gonna worry about it though. Today, I'll have a day. It should be okay. 

Til next time.   :)

xoxo.    :)

xxoo.    :)

Laterzzz.     :)

Byeeee.     :)))

Nothing, Nothing, Nothing.

It seems to me I put a lot of nothing on this thing. That's what I thought of this morning. I can kinda contemplate not doing this,  but it is just part of my routine I guess. It's me, maybe a cup of coffee,  waking up, and just doing it. There is no purpose for it, but it's just what I do.

Yesterday was busy as predicted. I worked late, got my full work out in, and picked up stuff for an easy meal. I ordered new rims for my truck, and they are going to put them on today. There was some corrosion on them so an investment in safety,  and no loss of tire pressure. I am pretty excited about it, cuz they are going to look pretty sharp. I wanted to try, and get it done yesterday, but I had too much shit to do.

Really not much more than that. Not a ton on my mind at all. I seem to have a lot of energy lately. More so than usual. Maybe cuz we survived the big freeze. Today it's supposed to approach 50° again, then a lot of upper 20s to lower 30s. February seems like it will zip on by, then it is March.

I live a life with little stress. I go about my business, which is basically work,  eat, sleep. I am confident, and content. I don't have a ton of responsibility. I am not lonely. I wake up most days feeling pretty good. I am free to be who I am, cuz I ain't nothing too important. I have no use for suits or costumes. I don't have to play any part. I just am not important enough, and that is fine with me.

Seems like such a long way from that young adult searching for a purpose,  and meaning to a life that didn't seem to have one. In the end I am not important, and life does have little meaning, but my heart is pretty happy with my life, how I feel, etc...   the purpose of me will eventually get done, but that is not my story. I am not the author of that.

I just get to live this simple life in the meantime. It is pretty easy being me. It is good to have a lot of energy. Everybody probably has struggles,  and stuff, but mine are far removed. I seemingly can wake up everyday, and be excited about it.

Anyway yesterday was pretty good. Today  should be okay too. We are making homemade pizza.

Like usual not much on my end. This is what I do though. I guess when you wake up in a pretty good mood most days this thing is easy.  Even if you got nothing to say. 

Anyways,  til next time. 

xoxo.    :)

xxoo.    :)

Laterzzz.     :)

Byeeee.     :)))

I Needed To Sleep In A Bit.

Good morning. How's it going?  Me, I am fine. I tried to stay up and watch the #sotu, but failed.  :)  probably for the best.

Yesterday was okay. I ended up with over 30,000 steps. I got the dishes done when I got home. Bil called me to meet him for a beer. He was in town. Paula the bartender gave me one more beer than I was going to order.  Oops. I picked up a rotisserie chicken for dinner with sides, and ran my robot.

It was a good day. Today I'll have to take Hope after work. It's a work out day too, so it'll be a busy one. Other than that not much.

Nothing much on my mind at all.  Today will be a day. I feel well rested. Ready for the day so to speak. Nothing on the horizon for me to worry about. 

I saw a guy just recently married doing shots and beers at the bar yesterday. He's the handy guy who put in our French door last Summer. You always wonder if there is a story there or just a random Tuesday. I feel shots with beers is kinda a big deal, but maybe not. Might just be a random boring Tuesday. I don't do shots so not really an expert.

We all have day to days I think. I write about mine a lot. Let you know what I think. There is no motive really, I just write down what I saw, and what I thought. Sometimes I'm angry. I never really have anything positive to say about the World is my guess. I feel positive about my life though. I'm in a good place. Nothing to worry about. I start most days feeling pretty good about it. I like my work. I feel good and relaxed at the end of my days. I don't go to bed hungry,  and I typically sleep enough.

Also I have nothing I need to accomplish. No goals, which may seem like I run in place kinda, but I feel fine. I am good with me, and I start out most days feeling okay. Probably not like the guy doing shots and beers yesterday.   :) 

Anyway. Today is a day. All is good on my end. I'll probably drive today due to freezing rain, but I'll check the street. The temp is above freezing. It will be a game time decision. 

Anyhoo, til next time. 

Laterzzz.     :)

xoxo.     :)

xxoo.     :)

Byeeee.     :)))

Twelve Me Something New.

Good morning. How's it going?  I am okay. Kinda excited for today. I'll be able to run Hope this morning, and bike to work. Quite a change from last week. We got over 50° here yesterday. Much of the snow is melted, and the sidewalks are clear of ice.

Yesterday was okay. I got my full work out in. Lisa, and I went to brunch at my place of employment. 50% discount I don't use a lot. We then saw a movie. Serenity with Matthew McConnaghy.  I don't know how to spell his name. It was strange. Not what I expected. I bought a roof rake. Watched some shows on Amazon Prime,  and went out for dinner. Pretty regular day. Nothing too crazy.

Today will be pretty normal too. Work might be busier than normal, as we have a man down due to some kind of illness. Tonight we will have a meal, so today will be another day.

I look inside my head,  and I got nothing important going on in here. Nothing I am really worried about. I do have a few things I can work on around the house,  but nothing too pressing. I imagine most people have any number of things to worry about. If you have kids that would be one thing. Finances are always another. As you get up in age health  would be one. Life can be busy too maybe people have to be accessible to a number of other people,  which I imagine that can get tiring. I assume that of course, cuz I luckily don't really have to be accessible to others. I just do my work,  eat, sleep thing. Not really a ton of stuff for me to worry about.

So what else?  Not really much. There is not a lot to my life. I assume people like to escape the noise and busyness of the World. Like go live at Walden Pond type thing. I do live there I guess, cuz in my head is no noise,  or busyness from the World. That stuff doesn't have any say in how I am, cuz my heart is at peace. Content in my existence. What we all seek for I have. I didn't make it, or create it. It was given to me for the wait period between 2 and 3 I guess.  It's pretty sweet too.  All my cares and anxieties carried away.

That's just me though. Outside that not much going on with me.

Til next time. 

xoxo.    :)

xxoo.      :)

Laterzzz.      :)

Byeeeee.    :)))

The Day Off.

Good morning. How's it going?  Me, I am fine. Yesterday was pretty perfect. I got all my stuff done. Got the ice out of the gutters, laundry cleaned,  folded,  and put away, dishes cleaned, took Hope for a walk. We got out of work super early too. Sundays will go quick as we have a more experienced guy in terms of working at this bakery. Instead of one guy doing most/all the finishing stuff we have two. I do muffins, cut cookies, all the donuts,  dishes,  and help with finish up. 

Today I just have to work out. My place is already open. I was able to watch most of the 2nd half of the Super Bowl too. Oh, I finished listening to another book yesterday too. #1 in a series.   ;) 

I have no idea what I'll do today. We ordered new rims for our truck. It would be pretty sweet if those came in. Other than that not much. I don't really have anything exciting on my mind to cook for dinner.

I have a day where I can do whatever I want, and there really isn't much I want to do. I still am happy for my day off. Just am not sure what I'll do to fill the time. Even if it was a Summer I wouldn't know.

There isn't anything of much importance on my mind. I just have my heart that feels upbeat. It's just how I wake up I guess. A gift really,  cuz there ain't no formula to feel like this.

Others I don't know. Life may be a grind, Super Bowl Monday may be hangover Monday. For me life is about the day to day.  Every day seems good. I don't work for the weekend, cuz every day seems fine. My days don't really need to be better.

I don't need a better version of myself,  cuz that will come in good time. Better than I could make myself.

I just am. An imperfect person who is indifferent to a lot of stuff. In the wilderness nothing matters.  All labor is vanity. In the wilderness we don't matter. Just a being thrown in this World.

What I do is what I am here to do. Not my story,  not my World. Also I don't know how the steps play out. I just know the endgame.

What you are doing is trying to find meaning in the wilderness. Barking up the wrong tree really. 

Anyhoo. 

Til next time. 

xoxo.    :)

xxoo.    :)

Laterzzz.      :)

Byeeee.      :)))

The Great Melt Off.

Good morning. How's it going?  Me, I am okay. Our roof melted. We had some ice, which I thought we took care of last year. On Friday I got on the roof,  and shoveled the edges,  and put a bunch of calcium chloride pucks on there. The front is all clear,  and water running down the gutters. Back is almost clear. I'll have to keep a closer eye on that shit from now on.  There will definitely be quite a bit less snow after the end of the 3 day warm up. One day did a lot.

Looking at the 10 day the weather seems pretty mild. That's good. I would not mind an easy February. Yesterday was your normal Saturday. I worked. I saw the movie Green Book after, and it was great. I totally recommend it. I came home, and watched The Departed. I forgot everyone dies. Today is Sunday, which is one of my favorite days. Get shit done, work,  and have a day off.

The Super Bowl is today,  which I don't really care. There will be a winner,  and a loser,  and much talking after. I don't really care one way or the other who wins. I guess the Super Bowl is probably a pretty big party day. Not for me. I probably haven't even stayed up many of the years in the past. I don't even remember who won it 2 years ago. Doubt I watched it last year, as I don't remember any plays. As far as sportsing, and it's much overemphasized importance, if we don't remember barely one year from the next, how important is it?  It's fun, that's it. Fun to play,  and fun to watch.

Other than that not much. I always kinda wonder how I always feel pretty good working on Saturday. I think it is cuz I am smart enough to get enough sleep. I just remembered that yesterday. I was getting 20,000 steps in before 1:00 PM. That's just little shit I think about on any given day. Just ponder how I feel, and why.

I guess I mostly feel okay.

Anyway, today will be a day.

Mark another dumb update by me.  :)

xoxo.   :)

xxoo.    :)

Laterzzz.     :)

Byeeee.      :)))

The Feeling When You Catch Up On Sleep.

I didn't check my sleep yesterday,  cuz I knew it was pretty nonexistent. This morning it said I slept zero hours yesterday. I doubt that, but maybe 1 hour.   So I got tired yesterday. All our dishes were dirty pretty much so I did those when I got home. I have a routine with dishes kinda so it doesn't take me long.

I put them all away too, once the dishwasher was done, and the rest air dryed. At some point I fell asleep before dinner. I woke up, and had dinner,  and went back to bed. I'm gonna guess I slept 8 hours last night at least.

Today I feel great. The great you feel when you catch up on sleep. I have work today, and workout. Back in my normal routine. It was cool to have days off, but even better to be back in my routine.

Other than that not much on my mind.  I am not really concerned with much. A little bit about snow melting,  and rain. I made over $44 in interest last month from my Discover savings account. They pay 2.08%  my credit union probably would pay .13 cents or something ridiculous for the same amount. Same with my other banks.

It is still zero degrees outside,  which is kinda annoying. Hope hasn't been getting any runs or walks. That's basically all I thought about this morning.  I keep track of the Chicago Bulls too since they are so awful. It would be interesting to see if their young core just turns into back up players for their careers. It's possible.

Yeah, that is pretty much all that ran through my head this morning. I had a talk with my dad last night about how stupid our lives are. I see it as the truth, and I am happy with mine, but I know really this is pretty dumb. We are here for a while and we die. We struggle over finances,  relationships, us being less than perfect entities. Everything is a struggle. People are always pissed about something related to politics it seems.

I suspect people think they are making some mark or something on this planet, but we don't.

I dealt with this life. I lived in the wilderness that one Summer where I saw the World offered nothing. Whatever allure it held for people was a lie. That was the first of 3 times I have to overcome. As they wheeled me up in chains on a bed.

Now I've overcome twice. Still once more to go. This time the wilderness has no power over me. The sadness of life does not sting.  The truth I am not afraid of.

I just have my little life of day to day. Easy peasy.

Laterzzz.     :)

xoxo.     :)

xxoo.    :)

Byeeee.      :)))