Thursday, May 24, 2018

There You Have It.

I got a good night sleep on Tuesday, and I got stuff done after work. Mowed the grass,  watered the garden, brought my hose reel from the shed to the front, and fixed my pavers we use for a walkway.

We did burgers on the grill. I used my scale, and weighed them at 8 oz. It was a little much, as I could only eat half of it. I like the idea of scaling the burgers though. I think I'll stick with 1/3 lb. or 1/4 lb. From now on.

It was just a good Spring day I guess. It was sunny, and around 70°  other than that not much. June 1st is coming up, and it will be the first time in forever I won't have a mortgage payment to be deducted from my account. That is an extra $830'ish extra money in my pocket every month.

I guess as far as doing the living thing everything seems okay. I work jobs I like. I have more money coming in than I need. I am pretty happy and content with my little life. I don't have much stress. I have enough things to keep me busy. Regardless of everything I wake up like this most days. Without a care in the World really.

People have tried going into the wild, or ventured at living at Waldon Pond to have what I have. What those people didn't know was they do not control their own heart. Their mistake was not knowing that powers outside their control were the masters of them.  You can find that by looking at yourself throughout the day.

You know you should typically feel and think a certain way most times about stuff. You'll see however inside you is judgement, and anger, and annoyance, and shit like that. You see it's there,  but you don't know the cause. We all are in the same boat too. Less than perfect,  and really no clue what perfect is really.

The path to getting to know yourself is no joke. It is nothing you can even imagine either. The truth is we think we are these pretty significant beings with pretty remarkable abilities. We should be counted as the grass blades are counted. That really is what our worth is. The World has been placing false values on  everything since forever,  and you are a creature of this World being well versed in accepting false values for everything. Your own importance being #1.

Anyway,  guess I better get going. My BIL is coming with me to help move my Dad, and drive one of the vehicles home. I'll drive the truck,  and he'll take Lisa's car home. Lisa will stay home fixing the inside. Should be pretty smooth,  and I'll take everyone out to dinner Saturday night. It should be a pretty okay time.

Anyway, let's see what today brings.

Til next time. 

Laterzzz.   :)

xoxo.   :)

xxoo.   :)

Wednesday, May 23, 2018

The Era Of Bad Hairstyles.

Good morning. How's it going?  I am fine. I slept better last night than the day before.  I was fine yesterday,  just tired after work.  I was even dozing a bit when I sat down.  So, I got nothing done after work. Our new A.C. is in, and it looks pretty nifty. It was actually more expensive than my furnace I had installed. It is a nice luxury. Window air conditioners work fine, but we would have to section off our rooms, and bathroom. It wouldn't do our whole living space. 90° and humid is horrible to try and sleep in.

Other than that not much going on.  I don't really have much to write about either. I guess if you remember me saying me growing up in the 'burbs of Chicago had no say in who I am. It played no part.  The true can be said of people too I guess. No person helped shape me.  A long time ago I went the way I did. It made me my own person I guess.

In so doing I lost all the baggage one carries from just growing up. There is nothing in my past that really matters I guess. I have no excuses for not being perfect. I am accepted I guess, and I guess it helps me be light hearted. We all are less than perfect, so who can anyone really impress? 

In that light our lives are pretty boring huh?  If are deeds are worthless,  than what are we struggling for? 

For one I guess I don't struggle for anything. I am not trying to make some type of name for myself. I definitely am not trying to be famous. I have no fairy tales I believe in to cloud my judgement. Out of thin air my heart is just content. A gift, and something in any daily,  yearly struggle I could not make for myself.

As this goes on there is less and less of me, and one wonders if anyone will actually ever get to know anyone else. I let you know me, cuz I live in the light,  and the darkness doesn't scare me.

We all are born in the dark though. Unable to see inside ourself. That remains the case too til your death. There is only one way to change that. I unknowingly went in that direction,  cuz I didn't see the point in anything else. Most of you have lived long enough to know no one is perfect, and your hearts aren't perfect either.

In the end I really wanted to be a good person,  but it was impossible. What does  it even mean? 

As I went my way my struggle was done with great fear, cuz I knew the end that was in store for me if something didn't change. Security before perfection. Who knew? I sure didn't. I was ready to suffer for what I wanted most.  The end of fear.

My path was scary. The wilderness the worst. I am where I am now though, and this ain't too shabby. What that means for you I have no clue. We definitely are in uncharted waters. It makes me distant in a way I guess. You can't impress with deeds though. They don't matter, so where is our value? 

Anyhoo, I guess that's good. I am afraid to go outside. I think one of our cats is terrorizing something.

Gotta run.

Til next time.


xoxo.   :)

xxoo.  :)

Tuesday, May 22, 2018

It's Been A Bit.

Good morning. How's it going?  I am fine. I haven't blogged in a bit. Sunday I went in at 2:00 AM instead of 7:00 AM, and yesterday I had to do a few things before the A.C. guys came. They are all prepped for the final install. They couldn't do it all yesterday, cuz it rained all day. I didn't even think about it. You typically don't want to run electricity in the rain.  Makes sense.

We took our 2nd and last free load to the dump. Got rid of more shit. We moved our bed to our new room. We are giving my Dad our room. It's bigger. Things will be a bit chaotic for a week or two perhaps, but I have a bed to sleep in, and I'll have food to eat. Really you don't need anything else. I thought of that earlier while laying in bed. No matter what I will be sleeping at night comfortably.

I don't know really what else there is to stress about. We declutter as we go along. I got rid of even more clothes too. I have 3 pair of jeans. 2 dress shirts,  and one dress pant. Shorts, underwear, and shirts for work,  and casual, and socks.

I pretty much spend zero dollars on clothes. If I need another pair of jeans I'll buy a pair or two.

We still will be busy with stuff, but first things first. Get my Dad moved.

Life continues to go on. I continue to work,  eat my nightly meal, and always have time to chill out a bit. I guess what I am saying is there is nothing for me to stress out about really. In my immediate family remain my brother and Dad. They both will be living in Holland before June is out. No Pejchls in Chicago, and none dealing with any crazy traffic anymore. 

I don't really have anything to say about the Suburbs of Chicago, except it had no say in who my 51 year old self is. It is no part of me, and I never have missed it.

Holland is pretty simple, just cuz you never really have to travel more than a few miles to do what you want. I typically don't either. That's pretty simple.

Anyway, I gotta go. Hope wants a little run.

Til tomorrow probably. 

Laterzzz.  :)

xoxo.   :)

xxoo.    :)

Thursday, May 17, 2018

Keep Moving Forward

Good morning. How's it going?  I am fine. Yesterday I had one of those days where progress forward undoes stress. I've been feeling a bit overwhelmed with all that needs to get done. Progress forward = wipes it away. I got a lot done yesterday, which makes me think everything is doable. Truck to move my Dad is reserved. We are switching out our slider for a French door. I scheduled a handyman to help me with that. Some guy I met at a bar.  We started talking. I told him I don't need anything done, but I took his number down just in case. Lisa got the door at work for $100, and we were not happy with our slider anyway. French doors are kinda cool too.

The plants I bought are in the garden. I was looking at the garden, and I can almost double the size. All I need to get is zuchinni, and beans,  and I may add more stuff too, since I'll have a bigger garden.

It was just a day though, where getting a little done helps my disposition I guess. I only had to cook for myself, and I made steak fajitas. Just a pretty good day I guess.

I did talk to my Dad too. I was kinda worried about his huge desk he had. I saw it when I was up last. He doesn't need it.  That is huge, we don't have to move it. I remember seeing it thinking it was nice, but big. We don't have to take it. He seems intent on keeping the minimum, and in pretty giid spirits too. There is a Health club free in Holland for people over 50 I'll get him signed up for. He can meet people,  and stuff. He won't have financial stress either, cuz that is taken care of. In this house as long as people can accept people all will be fine. No one in this house is perfect, and none of us are saints, but if you don't judge too harshly, and mostly accept,  all can get along.

We will look at other places too. I guess I am just glad it will all be done soon. My Dad will live out his final years having plenty of home cooked meals. It's probably what he missed most the last 30 years I bet. He probably doesn't know it though.

So, I guess that was the day. I got a lot done, and it makes everything look good.

Not much else for me. 

Laterzzz.   :)

xoxo.    :)

xxoo.   :)

Wednesday, May 16, 2018

Finally The Rain Stopped.

Good morning. How's it going?  I am fine. I got a good sleep last night. Slept extra too. Yesterday went pretty good. My A.C. guy left his voltage tester at a previous job, and I couldn't find mine, so he is coming back today. We already figured where we will put the A.C.,  but have to make sure I get power in this other box I have. I am sure I do, but gotta test it to make sure. There is a breaker for an electric range. It is gas now.

I cut the grass, so that is good. I used the trimmer too which still works. It is like 18 years young. I am ready anytime to get a new one, but I guess I don't need to. I went and got tomato plants, and cucumber plants too. I think getting outside,  and getting some work done is good for you. At least it seems to me.  I think it made my day.

Other than that not too much.  I really want to get my Dad moved. I want it over really. It will be a pain in the butt. He wanted to talk to me about something. God only knows what. The way he is, and the way he gets around I think he should be ready to live out his final years, trying to enjoy little things. I have a feeling he still thinks he is going to find the fountain of youth. If you are old you should accept it. It will make things easier. I have a feeling a story about him being cheated will be his story, but at my age he was in my position financially. His wife died, and his house was paid off. He owned 2 properties in Normal, IL. If he got a job for 20 years doing whatever he'd be fine. I don't know what he did to be honest.

I think back to him, and my Uncle,  and I don't think they cooked many meals. You cannot eat out all the time. Cooking isn't hard at all, and probably a good thing to learn for all people. The meal at the end of the day should be a highlight I think.

I am glad though my garden will be in before Memorial day. I am glad I got outside. I cannot help to think of all the people who do not cook their own meals.

I guess I wonder kinda what people think life should be. I wonder what they think on the inside I guess.  I suppose all judge really,  cuz when others are wrong, than we are right, right?

Life is surely strange, and people stranger I guess.

Anyhoo, I gotta go. 

Til next time. 

xoxo.   :)

xxoo.   :)

Tuesday, May 15, 2018

We Got Some Done.

So, I had my Monday off. We got some stuff done. We are basically moving our room to the craft room. Taking a little inventory of stuff, I really don't have much. I don't need much in the way of clothes, and I don't have much. Work shirts, jeans, shorts,  and one pair of pants for dress. Lisa on the other hand holy shit. She could give 2/3rds of her clothes away, and still have way more than she needs. She should too.

She is attached to pieces of furniture too. It is good we are moving our room, cuz there is more shit we can get rid of. Stuff has a tendency to gather just while we live. It is probably good to go through,  and get rid of stuff frequently.

I gather people like to collect stuff, and in the end it costs money, and adds to work in the long run. When in doubt throw it out is a good philosophy to live by.  Someone will always eventually have to deal with the shit you accumulate.

We really only need a little amount of clothes. A bed, couch,  and chairs to lounge in. Stuff to cook meals,  and store food. The hoarding mentality just makes everyone's life harder really. 

At the age of 51 I think it is probably better to simplify things than make things harder. Less Is more in life in most things. Less responsibility = less stress really.

I think internally people always strive for more, and want more, cuz hearts typically strive after wind. Never satisfied. We'll be moving my Dad up here soon, and I keep thinking about him keeping that stupid bike. We dont get better, and smarter with age. My uncle kept, and moved work papers from like 40 years ago.

I guess now I think everyone is probably messed up in ways. Our hearts are constructed in such a way we make our lives harder. Striving for more, and more stuff means you put on yourself more and more stress.

In life there is a balance, but hearts cannot comprehend.  We aren't made to. We were made to be neurotic to the bones no doubt about it. (Cannot remember what song those lyrics came from)

Anyway, today,  I'll do the grass, it rained yesterday. I decided with all the rain I won't get a rototiller. The ground is as soft as can be.

I guess today I'll have a day. I'll be busy. My A.C. guy is coming,  but that will only take a minute. I am getting one quote.  His,  he's my guy. So basically just scheduling it really.  There will be a dinner, and I guess that's good.

Okee doke.

I'll cya.

xoxo.   :)

xxoo.   :)

Monday, May 14, 2018

Monday Monday.

Good morning. How's it going?  Me, I am okay. All in all my Sundays will be like a 13 hour work day. It seems like a lot, but it is two places. At the bakery I fry the donuts on Sunday as the main part, and it is fast paced really. It was my 2nd time doing the donuts,  and it really isn't rocket science. I'll get better, and quicker,  and more efficient etc...  I really do like the jobs I work.

My brother accepted the offer he got on my Uncle's townhouse,  so everything will be settled in late June. All assets liquidated,  and he'll just have to pay taxes on whatever capital gains there were on the assets.  We split the proceeds, which were already considerable. After paying off my house this last part is minor for me. I won't be doing anything with the money, but investing in boring old investments. Zero stock market exposure,  as I don't trust it. So I won't be making potentially great gains,  although I do believe interest rates will rise,  and that  equates to a better rate of return on what is considered safer investments.

I don't have a house payment,  so all the money we make goes to utilities,  taxes, and savings. 

Anyway, enough about that stuff. It's just my life. It's been pretty simple for a while.   There hasn't been a ton to worry about I guess. I don't have any great hobbies. I don't do any really exciting things like travel, and whatever people consider exciting, and yet in life I miss out on nothing. My secret is how I feel on the inside. That doesn't come from me. There is no secret diet, and no secret exercise.   There is just my story.  

What I have is what everyone secretly wants. An indifference to the World,  and a feeling of contentment. The path of you will always leave you wanting.  The path of us is a dead end. No hope for what we really want. It would be interesting to see the inside of people, but all we get is pictures of how great everything is.

I wonder if people even can see inside themself. 

Who knows?

Anyway, I have a day off to have.

Guess I better get to it.

Cya.   :)

xoxo.   :)

xxoo.    :)