Some Things Learned.

Good morning. How's it going?  Me, I am fine. Yesterday was pretty good. I was busy. 30,000 steps I did not hit. I was over 28,000 though. 30,000 I am realizing is a pretty big number. It would be easy if you ran like 10 miles to start your day, but I don't do that. I run short,  and just try to hit it as a part of life.  It's a big number that way.

Yesterday really was a good day. Like I said I was busy, and it was sunny. I did the dishes, cuz once again all the dishes were pretty much dirty. I made home made pizza. I made my own dough too. A simple recipe. I also cleaned up some shit in the back. I had time to sit outside with Hope too. It was a full day.

I fell asleep without a worry in the World. I woke up feeling rested. That is the key. I did lay in bed from 2:30-3:00, just cuz it was so comfortable. I probably could have stayed in bed, but 30,000 needs an early morning run. I can always take Hope after work, and a workout,  but it feels good to get it done early.

Outside of that not much. Just doing the life thing. One day at a time, and my days are full. I finish my days off, and I feel pretty good about stuff. I don't have anything terribly important on my mind. No thoughts holding me down.

In the World there is much division. I think it's what humans probably do as a natural course. A lot of information gets thrown around. A lot of sugar coated History books making heroes out of flawed people. The news today just creates more division. It is an area where hate is propagated. Hate sells. It's as simple as that. Hate beats out decency it seems, cuz hate has a better sounding voice for people. Once you are in its clutches it's hard to break the cycle. You start following other like minded hate voices,  and all of a sudden you believe a lot of nonsense. Your blind to reason at this point, and all of a sudden you got nothing to say. Beyond help at this point. Hate overwhelms you, and has taken you over.

Meanwhile, I am just doing my day to day. There will be something hopefully approaching 30,000 steps. A run, a bike, a workout,  and a meal. A good night sleep too, cuz I am tired. The next day I am recovered and we do it again.

Simple.

Anyway, I gotta go.

Laterzzz.       :)

xoxo.     :)

xxoo.       :)

Byeeeeee.        :)))

A 17,000 Page Treatise On The Value Of Proper Fork Usage.

Good morning. How's it going?  Me, I am good. Yesterday was fine, except we had to drive to pick up the car. About a half hour each way. I hate driving, and I hate when my day has that kind of glitch. Whatever though.  I got my workout in, but not the home part. I can do it this morning. It's just pushups,  and pull ups,  and really you can do them every day. So no biggie. My steps were just under 25,000, so fell short.

Other than that everything is okay. My investment account is up and running. I add $100 every week. I'll be the weenie who looks all the time probably.

Other than that not much. We did go out to dinner last night. We had a view on the water. There is a walkway, and I was surprised how many runners passed by. Dinner was good. It was kinda an expensive place, but whatever.

In about a month my schedule will change. I'll have every Sunday off, and work on Monday again. That is fine too. I'll have all of Saturday afternoon off, and all of Sunday. It should be okay.

What else?  What else is sometimes it is a struggle to write something here. You kinda search inside for something,  and sometimes nothing is there.  My days are pretty typical. Work, be active,  eat, and sleep. I don't do politics,  cuz why would I want to be angry all the time. If people try to shove it down my throat I block them. Keep that shit to yourself. I don't want to see it. Everybody is getting angry about shit, and nothing really gets done. Sow in hate, what do you think you'll reap?  You do the Devil's work, and you believe you are in the right for doing it.

I don't have a cause I am fighting for here. There are no causes really. We are just living a life. I'd like mine to be without anger. I don't particularly like angry people either. They tend to want to spread their disease. It's either that or they actually have to deal with their main cause of their  anger.  Easier to spread misery I spose.  Who wants to face the fact they are flawed. An angry heart has personal issues. Not political ones, but the weak will ALWAYS get that confused.

So today I have a day. There will be work, and steps,  and a run, and stuff. Just like yesterday.  Hopefully today I will be closer to 30,000 steps instead of 25,000.

I spose.   I really got nothing. 

Laterzzz.      :)

xoxo.       :)

xxoo.      :)

Byeeeeeee.       :)))

On This Thing Goes.

I was definitely having title problems this morning. Life goes on though. Another day was had. My day went pretty much as planned. Ran, worked, did some stuff outside. Just under 28,000 steps. For the record I am not sure if I ever hit 30,000 steps before, but there is plenty over 25,000. Today is a workout day. We have to pick up our car too. It is fixed,  and I am pretty sure for good. We got our driveway quote. It is only $4700. I was thinking it could be as high as $10,000 so that was good news.

I have to file more taxes. I will have to pay a chunk. The estate is finally all settled,  and I have to pay what I assume are IRA withdrawal taxes, and income. I still have some cash coming back to me, so that will make up for the taxes I have to pay. It will probably break even,  but in my favor. Meaning I'll have some left over.

Life goes on. Every day there is stuff to do. It's spring time so stuff we want to do. At the end of the day I want my steps. Hopefully they just coincide with me living. I like chill out time too. Where you have a drink, and eat dinner,  maybe watch tv, and crash. Wake up and start a new day.

I don't know how other people live. It's enough I live my own life. I have stuff to do each day. I want to feel on most days, and I think I do. I don't really have a lot of stuff to stress me out.

I guess it helps I am not looking for a better life. This one is fine. I do not need a better outlook. My future is bright.

It helps I guess I know what life is about. I know about the hidden stuff. I know kinda what makes us tick. I know I am not like others. I am assured of my ways, and that makes me strong.

I can do this thing, and it ain't nothing. Wake up, jot a few things down,  and be on my way.

I am not making a big splash. I am just living my life. It's an easy one. That is all I can say.

Today I have a day. There will be a run, and bike, and steps,  and a workout. There will be work,  and a meal. I will fall asleep hopefully approaching 30,000 steps. Wake up tomorrow,  and do it again.

I feel good being me. It's kinda nice.

Anyway, I guess. 

Laterzzz.      :)

xoxo.      :)

xxoo.      :)

Byeeeeeee.        :)))

The Post War Dream.

2 Suns in the sunset. Good morning. How's it going?  Me, I am fine. Yesterday was okay. We did our finance thing. Basically we have someone taking care of our extra money to invest,  and our IRA money. You really have to trust people to do that kinda thing I see. I went with a small company. A recommendation from someone I work with, and we know someone who works there. I don't really have a ton of confidence in investing,  but I'll put cash away anyway. My IRA stuff is aggressive'ish, and my other one is conservative. What can you say?  It's just money. I still marvel at how much trouble people get into just cuz of money.

Why is it so important?  I was just as happy having it as not having it. Life went on. The days still came and went.  I think I was mostly happy working. Filling my day with stuff. Chilling out a bit, and sleeping. Having a meal.

I know people look up to people who have a lot of money. Why?  If you have too much you have nothing to do with it. Why would you want 12 houses?  If you have a lot of money I think the stupidest thing you can carry is debt. Do you need the airplane,  yacht, Summer,  Winter,  Memorial Day, house?  I'd say Labor day, but perhaps rich people don't celebrate Labor day.

I suspect this has always been the case. Money pictured  as being much more important than it really is. It doesn't cure our outlook. Just look at our current President.  You don't see many with more anger and hate in their heart. I would wager he is one person who would carry debt. He seems shallow and insecure. My tie is bigger than yours,  and so is my Summer yacht etc...   who shit in his cheerios to make him so angry?  Why do people like anger in people. Gives them a place to vent. Gives us a scapegoat so we have an area to place our frustrations, since we too are angry for some reason.

Maybe the 24 hour news cycle isn't so great. There has to be something worthwhile to watch for 24 hours right? 

On my day off yesterday I didn't think of 24 hour news cycles. I got my workout in. We got all our grasses cut, and out to the  road. We got our investment stuff done. Our car started running rough so we took it in. It's under warranty. Also gave us an excuse to go to Kirby bar and grill in Grand Haven. It's where we have to take it for warranty work. The car is kinda a lemon for having under 30,000 miles. Thinking about trading it in for a helicopter.    ;)   j/k

I went to bed really early too, which pretty much is the best of all things. Today I have a day planned. There will be work,  and steps,  and food. There may be some sit outside time too like yesterday. It was warm in the Sun.

I don't think I'll waste my time being angry about stuff in the 24 hour news cycle. It's made to look more important than it is. Money is the root of all evil, and viewership is advertising money. The agenda is viewership from the conglomerate owned news outlets. You'd think news would be the driving force right?  Nope it's money. The World is weird like that. So now we got everyone angry cuz of bottom lines.

Just look at your social networking. If you haven't blocked all the news people yet. The news people have their talking points.

Anyways, like I said today is a day. It should be okay. Hopefully 30,000 steps. The important thing is the run in the morning, and working for an hour or so after work. Also to not be tired or kinda work through it. We do have a lot to do. Just not as much as last year. 

I spose.

Laterzzz.      :)

xoxo.     :)

xxoo.     :)

Byeeeeeee.       :)))

The Excitement Of The Day Off.

So many opportunities to do stuff. I know tomorrow my day off will never meet the expectations I have right now, but it is still pretty exciting waking up like this. I do have to work out, and do the finance thing. Lisa bought us new suitcases for traveling. That is one less thing to do today. Ill probably do yard work. Get shit taken to the road. Lisa already got a start to it.

I did get all my shit done yesterday. It's why I love my Sundays. House gets cleaned,  dishes,  and all laundry folded and put away. At work I am busy, but it is pretty stress free I guess. I am getting better at doing donuts. It ends up being a fast paced night,  but it goes by quickly. I am typically frying donuts before 5:00 PM, and decorating is done probably between 8:00, and 9:00. Also they are separated for the two locations. I do dishes package whatever is left,  clean up,  and mostly we are out before 10:00 PM. A day of accomplishments I guess. It's the little things that make me feel good I guess.

Other than that not much. The 10 day looks fine. My outlook looks good. I got that Seattle trip coming up. That should be fun. Life is fine I guess. Really not much for me to worry about.

My highest gas bill this season was $87. That is pretty nice. My gas bills will slowly fall down to nothing. If it gets hot and humid, the air conditioner can really increase our electric bill. That pretty much is just July, and August, and maybe only 1 week or two where we'd have to turn it on. Lisa's thermostat is whack,  cuz of her age, so she may want it on more.

Kinda nice waking up with nothing to worry about,  feeling good,  and just contemplating your day. I like it. That it is Monday, and people are starting their week is just a feather on top.

As you can see there is nothing on my mind. I'll hit publish anyway. I've been blogging a lot this year. More so than usual for some reason. 

Guess I got more of nothing to say this year.   :)  probably more like I wake up early almost every morning.

Oh well.

Laterzzz.      :)

xoxo.     :)

xxoo.       :)

Byeeeeeeee.        :)))

Over 9 Hours Of Sleep.

Good morning. How's it going?  Me, I am doing good. I fell asleep during a basketball game. Like 8:00 PM, and didn't wake up til 2:00 AM on the couch. Then went to bed,  and slept a few more hours. It's Sunday so I got my routine. I was kinda tired the last two days for some reason.

Everything else is fine. Nothing crazy going on with me. I have tomorrow off, but I have a few things to do. Got a meeting to set up my investment accounts. I have to work out, and seems there were a couple other things to do too. I think I have my goal set. I want to have at least 72 miles of steps each week. I'll fall short this week. I don't think it will be too hard,  unless I find myself tired a couple days in the week. I'd like to hit the 100 mile mark too at some point. That may be hard. 

72 miles I hope can just be a normal thing just by living. 100, I would have to add. Just something to keep track of I guess.   Outside of that not much. I just do my daily thing. Not much to worry about. I have enough money, and not much to spend it on. I keep active with work,  and taking Hope. I do my upper body workout on M,W, and F.

Pretty simple. I don't feel I have any agenda.  I just live out my days. I don't seek out greener pastures.  I am not looking for better days. If I had all the money in the World that would be a waste. I'd rather live as I am now. I wouldn't change a thing. I stay busy with 2 jobs. It fills my day pretty well,  plus they are active jobs so a lot of steps. I have my one day off which is fine. More than enough really.   :)

My life is easy. Feeling tired is the only thing that can slow me down. Sometimes just relaxing for 15 minutes can recharge me.

I live in a World where I have nothing to accomplish. No goals really except that 72 miles I'd like to reach each week. I won't kill myself if I don't. It's just a baseline to jump over or fall short of. I don't need anything, and I don't feel I am missing out on anything. I just live a simple life with little concerns.

Anyways I spose. 

Laterzzz.      :)

xoxo.        :)

xxoo.       :)

Byeeeeee.         :)))

I Almost Forgot To Add This.

Remind me, I have to add a title to this entry. I could not think of a title for the life  of me. Just sitting there looking at the wall. I thought I somehow overslept,  or didn't hear the alarm. I thought my watch said 3:15, but I can't see shit without my reading glasses on. It was only 2:15. I woke up from a deep sleep too, so you always feel tired then. I was tired last night. I fell asleep after dinner like 6:15 PM. I think I was tired cuz I drove. Around 20 miles each way to my BIL's house. Dropped off a couple couches, and checked out the finished product of his new house. I don't drive much. Not far when I do either.

Other than that yesterday was pretty normal. I worked, had over 25,000 steps, ran and biked. There wasn't much on my mind yesterday. I didn't think of anything really. Another day gone though.  They keep coming. I kept forgetting the NCAA tourney started yesterday. I didn't do a bracket,  so I guess I am completely retired from guessing/studying sportsing things. Not that I do anything real important in its place, but that part of me is over.

In life there aren't really any important things to do. We are powerless about so much. We want to make ourselves better, but our heart does it's own thing. Maybe people want to make the World better, but how?  I think many deeds are selfish deeds pretty much. In the end we don't make any dents. We may want to feel like we are special,  but we are not. We are here living day after day, and not really doing anything of consequence. Really just putting in our time.

We don't come out without flaws either. We did "wrong" stuff. It is kinda important we look at true shit like that. We aren't coming out perfect,  and either is anyone else. Kids included. Hopefully kids don't turn into mass murderers, and farm animal molesters. I'm innocent on the murder one.   ;)

I wonder if the World has always been so angry. As a kid I don't remember being angry. As a grown up everyone seems angry about something. I guess wars have been fought forever so I guess people have always been angry.

Seems stupid right?  One life,  and everyone is ready to have one taken. Everyone is holding onto some type of shitty information as their truth. A prisoner of some type of propaganda. The World does not know the truth, and it is kinda impossible to not be a student of the World. I was, until a turn, and whoops,  life is different than anything I imagined.

I thought I was special I guess for a brief time,  and quickly after I was put in my place. Now I am reconciled I guess. Instead of an enemy I am accepted. So I am secure.  The worries all taken away.

It really is a crazy story. One that's been hidden for a while.  Pretty strange really. I know people don't get it. I learned long ago to not trust in my own understanding. I knew my heart did not have understanding. The formula is easy. Am I the best a person can be?  No.  Therefore I do not have understanding.

It's easy for me to judge cuz I've had a small taste of what it will be like to be the best a person can be. I am nowhere near that point. I know where you stand on that equation too. Just not sure if you do.

Anyway I spose.

Life is strange kinda. People can be a trip.

I gotta run. I hope to be nearer to 30,000 steps today.

Laterzzz.       :)

xoxo.       :)

xxoo.      :)

Byeeeee.        :)))

I Toll You, Time Keeps Moving.

Good morning. How's it going?  Me, I am fine. Yesterday was a pretty good day. I did make lasagna like I said I'd probably do. I got my workout in. Almost forgot about the home part,  but remembered while the garlic bread was baking.

Let's see if anything happened yesterday. Nope,  not really. Yesterday was a day, and today is another. I feel well rested. I got to bed early enough.  I was a bit tired when I got home yesterday,  but I did have time to relax before starting dinner.

I really did not have a thing to worry about. After work,  or working out if it's a workout day I don't have anything I have to do. My life is super easy like that. It makes me think others must be quite busy. I ain't driving kids to soccer practice. I don't really have to be accessible. I don't really get important emails or texts or phone calls. Outside of my daily labor I am not really counted on for anything. After work, I do whatever for a couple hours, eat, and then sleep. Last night we watched a couple Frasier episodes.

Life isn't easy I spose. My life is. I guess the secret for me is my heart. It's just fine with who I am and how I live. I don't need more. I am content in how things are.  My vice I keep moderate. I don't go crazy. I stay busy, and active. Typically at the end of the day I am tired.  I typically sleep pretty good too.

I guess so much of who we are comes from the inside. My insides are pretty laid back I guess. It's all good you know?  Yesterday was a day, and it was okay. Today will be a day, and I suspect it will be okay.

I dunno,  I guess I start out each day mostly positive about stuff. It helps living these days is easy as heck.

Whatever.  I spose. 

Laterzzz.      :)

xoxo.      :)

xxoo.      :)

Byeeeeeeee.       :)))

An Unexpected Sleep In Day.

I guess it was always a possibility. Our appointment with the tax lady was at 6:00 PM. I am usually am finishing dinner, and settling down at that time. We went to dinner after. It was probably a late for me night. No clue what time I went to bed. I was tired after work too. It was a 30,000 step day too, so I was busy.

Other than that not much. All things considered it was just another day. The tax man giveth us an extra $1300. My IRA contribution really helped. The rest of the week is mine. I have to drive today cuz of rain. Last I checked it is going to rain most of the day so. It works out good,  cuz I can get groceries after my workout. What to do for dinner. Maybe lasagna. It's been a while.

I don't think I thought of anything significant yesterday. It's always good to get the taxes done. It's good to get a refund too, but I guess $1300 isn't that exciting. My how times have changed. I hafta say my days typically are kinda the same. I labor for ~8 hours, and have time to do what I want. I eat a dinner and crash. Like I've said before I don't have a lot of stuff to worry about. I don't have a lot of baggage. We all are imperfect so everyone carries baggage. We can't dress up in Saint's clothes. I've gone through my life though. This piece of crap has been accepted before being the best a person can be. When I started my journey decades ago I obviously had no idea what I was getting into. From suffering to the solo journey in the wilderness it all seemed very hard.

The energy returned that one night, and it was like a get out of jail free card. I knew I had more to do,  but I knew it wasn't then. So, I was free to live a life. It was pretty typical. Typically unstellar. Then the running blogs started, and so did I again. I kept living for the final thing I must do. I knew I didn't have a future, but look at me now. I did have a bit of a future. The wait started years ago. Eventually I must do that final thing,  but I have no clue when. So I live like a normal human, although deep down I know I got that thing to do. That thing makes my current life pretty much no more. I'll be different, and so will my life. The World?  No clue what it will look like, but it probably won't be great days, but obviously I cannot read the future. I was given the outline to the story kinda. I knew the end. The when I have no clue.

Anyways, my days remain pretty easy. Work, eat, sleep. The future I am not concerned with. That part for me is taken care of. I am not sure how scared I'll be when I do that final thing. You never know how much you can change when you are taken to the judges.

Still I don't worry. I am in good hands, and my heart knows it.

Anyways I spose.

Laterzzz.      :)

xoxo.      :)

xxoo.      :)

Byeeeeeee.     :)))

Just Getting Some Shit Done.

Good morning. How's it going?  Me, I am fine. Yesterday was okay. I got my workout in, stopped at the local lumber yard for toilet paper, water softener salt,  dish soap,  and garbage bags. I got my haircut, and Lisa and I had an appointment with an investment guy. I am transferring my IRA, and opening another investment account. Stash some cash,  and add every week from our income. I'll add to my IRA every year too.

I am excited about having a plan,  and the plan not involving me thinking.  We obviously make more than our bills so at least I have an area I can put some money that may outperform interest. I am keeping my money in the Discover savings account, because that actually makes money. I have too much cash in shitty checking and savings accounts though. I was actually pretty excited for getting that done.

We went out to dinner last night. Lisa has been craving pizza from The Medici or something like that. I think it is Mediterranean pizza or something. I had a calzone, and ate the whole thing. I had weird dreams last night too. Nothing too crazy. I was downstocking at a retail establishment. Avril Lavigne was in it for some reason. People kept getting like affirmation notes and shit.  Who knows? 

So, a day was had. We are doing our taxes tonight. I have absolutely no idea how those will turn out. Not a clue. It will be done though. I think I'll probably get a little return. It won't be big either way. Pay in, or return wise. It is kinda nice I don't have to be smart about shit like that. I have a person to do that, and I pay her.

I know now how one can get stuff done when it's warm out. You just have more energy I think. Sun is out,  and it's not 12 degrees outside anymore. I spend a shit ton of time outside too when it's warm.

My life is set up in a way where I labor 6 days/week, and I have time every day to do what I want after. I feel pretty good,  and pretty positive most days I'd say. I don't have a ton of shit to worry about either. Today I'll take Hope before work. I'll bike to work. I'll get a lot of steps in. It will be a productive day. I'll get my taxes done,  do dinner, and sleep. Tomorrow will be much like today, although it is a workout day.

My life is easy. Best of all I don't have to be smart about creating the future I want. I don't have to worry about that stuff.  I wonder how much stress is in people's lives for that reason alone.

Anyway, I spose. 

Laterzzz.     :)

xoxo.      :)

xxoo.     :)

Byeeeeeee.      :)))

Waking Up Early On A Day Off.

You know a day off looks quite different when the high will be 40-something instead of like 11°.  What can you do in 11° weather?  Yesterday I got all my Sunday shit done. The warm'ish weather has me wanting to do more maybe. My Sunday is really a pretty good day. I get a lot of shit done before work. Back in the day I was always a pretty good 2nd shifter. My secret is wake up early.

So, not much else going on with me. Another day done, and another day started. Hard to believe eventually these days run out. Contrary to popular belief we are not doing anything important. Nothing of lasting significance. We all are just living out our days.  It would be a shame if some are doing it with anger in their heart.

We were listening to Howard Stern last night at work.  He was asking Ronnie, I think, why he is so angry. Ronnie is seeing a shrink. A new one, his last one fell asleep on him during a session.   :)  Howard wondered cuz he is angry,  and he doesn't really know why. Howard has more than enough money, so that is telling for people who believe wealth is the key to happiness.

Our current President is as angry as anyone. He confuses his anger with a very judgemental heart. Everyone is wrong,  except the problem really lies with him. Throw away the scapegoats.  The shit in your heart is your flaw. Not others.  I suspect he believes he is so right, cuz he believes himself to be very intelligent. Introspection is far from him, so very little hope for him.

Before one can fix the World one must fix themself. That is where you stand. Your deeds will not amount to anything.   When you embark on the journey to fix yourself you will discover how weak and powerless we really are. The arrogant have a very very hard/ route. They don't believe they are flawed. 

Anything other than going this way is a waste of time. I'd rather play solitaire if I am going to waste my time. 

Anyways. 

Til next time. 

Laterzzz.      :)

xoxo.     :)

xxoo.     :)

Byeeeeeeee.      :)))

That's A Miracle.

Good morning. How's it going?  I slept 10 hours last night. Can you imagine?  It was a pretty normal day. I worked. I didn't see a movie,  cuz I had a guy come take measurements of the driveway to give a quote. I have no idea how much it will cost,  but hopefully not horrible.  Our current driveway goes from the garage to 2/3 of the way to the street. It doesn't go all the way. It's not uncommon to have it that way either for some reason.

Now we'll have a full drive, and a side part that will fit two parked cars.

Anyway, I finished a book and started another. I'll finish it today probably. It's my Sunday work night. 

Really outside that not a lot going on. I am having coffee. I'll start laundry after this, do dishes,  and take Hope. Tomorrow I have to work out, and get a haircut. That's about it. Hopefully the guy gets the quote back pretty quick so I know what I am looking at price wise. I figure I'll pay it regardless. I don't think it should be too horrible.

Yeah so that's basically it for me. I have a week starting up. I got some new movies I can check out.  Last I checked the weather should be decent this week temp. wise.

All is okay on my side. The outlook looks pretty easy this week for me. Plus I got my Seattle trip approaching closer and closer. Good times, and Spring is here as far as I am sure Winter is done.

It should be a good year. 

Laterzzz.     :)

xoxo.       :)

xxoo.       :)

Byeeeeee.         :)))

Out And Out.

So my early alarm went off. I turned it off, and fell back asleep for 3 days? 2 weeks? 5 hours?  Nope only a half hour, but I was out. Hold on, I am going to check my sleep.  I slept almost 8 hours. I needed it. I was tired 2 days ago, and slept only 5 hours. It's a workout day too so glad I am rested.

Yesterday was okay. I almost got a ride home cuz it was raining hard, and thunder. It let up in time so I was able to take my bike. My summer bike has fenders, and fenders rule for a commute bike. I paid extra to get fenders. I've been commuting mostly for geesh, longer than I've been doing this. So forever basically. Since gas went up to $2/ gal. I grew up on dollar packs of cigarettes and $1/ gal of gas. I grew up too when an exotic beer was Old Style light in a bottle.   :)    lol.   God, I am old.

So, not much going on with me. Yesterday was a day. I worked,  ran, did the dishes. We had a meal. I apparently fell asleep at some point in time. I was out like I said. Today I have another day planned. It should be okay.

My life continues to be pretty easy. I think mostly cuz I don't have to mold the World, and people to fit my plan of how I want my future to look. My future is in another's hands. A story has already been started, just not finished. It was a story I would originally say was very hard with much suffering, but I am so far removed from hard I barely remember kinda. You know how someone dies. It's hard during the time, but as time goes on they are just a memory. The hard times of my life are exactly like that.

The hard suffering will revisit me one time in the not too distant future. When, I have no idea. Until then I just do my day to day. The days are fine. I stay busy. Typically I am not bored. Being in my head is fine with me. My heart typically is pretty upbeat. My heart is such a way that I feel in life I miss out on nothing. No regrets about anything. No missed opportunities.  Nothing. It is good to be okay in one's own head. It makes things seem easy.

As for others I am sure life is a struggle at times. How others live, and how they think I am far removed from too. I imagine different things push against you at different times. Should I be more like this?  Should I not think like this?  Should I do this?  Should I strive for that?  Being alive is hard like that, unless you had nothing to worry about. We are born believing money is the key to that altered state, or some high, or whatever, but none of it is. None of that makes us always feel content. The key is your heart. You don't control your heart, so how do you propose to always feel good about stuff?  What actions will you take?  Kinda makes you feel like the dude with the limbs on his back taking the stairway to heaven huh?  You can't labor your way to a content heart. You cannot accumulate enough money to make you feel the same.

Also you are made in such a way that you think you are the master of your Universe. All powerful and all knowing to create the future you want.

The future you want is a content heart, but unbeknownst to you is you cannot create it. All actions to this date have all been in vain.  Amounting to zero points. You don't know it, and you don't believe it. I can't really help you either. Your walk is yours alone. You stand alone in how you deal with this. Family, friends etc... have no saying in this. Just you. You don't go with your friends and groups when you go 6' under. A plaque in your memory doesn't matter at that point either. 

Life is fricken hard. Pretty close to impossible to get it right. I did get it right. Not by being perfect, cuz that is impossible on my own. Really I was asked to face my future with being an imperfect person. Dealing with that truth. Dealing with those consequences too. Security comes before perfection though. I overcame twice so far, and I am accepted. It's how my story goes. 

Anyways I spose. 

Laterzzz.      :)

xoxo.      :)

xxoo.      :)

Byeeeeeee.        :)))

Not All Days Are The Same.

So yesterday I was tired for some reason. All things seemed the same as the day before too. Go figure. Of course my tired day was my workout day. :)  I could tell with my workout I was tired. Everything was just a little tougher. I did ride my Summer bike which was cool. Other than that not much.

There really wasn't much on my mind yesterday as usual.  Nothing too significant happened. I chilled at home. Did my home part of my workout,  had a couple drinks,  and had a frozen pizza for dinner. Then I went to bed. Oh, I ran my robot too.

There wasn't much to my day as you can see. Work, eat, sleep with some down time at the end. I didn't watch any tv, and I guess that's pretty normal. There are no things really that would equate to a higher morality or virtue are there?  No action that would give a person points over what another does.

Our activities don't make us better people. It's just shit we do. We aren't making ourselves Saints by any stretch.  If you are a newsy person it don't make you a better person. It probably makes you an angrier person. Hard to disguise that.

Your hard effort in whatever did nothing to give you a better heart. You weren't born with a great caring heart, and you didn't make one somehow. The virtues we have heard about none of us posess. I think people think for the most part they do posess these things. One really does have to overcome the lies thrown our way.

I see the World is unfair as always. Something about buying ones way to a better education. How did money become so important in things?  More wealth one assumes makes one more happy,  but I don't find that to be true. One really needs to be content in their days to be happy,  but the hearts we were born with like to strive after wind. Never enough money. Never enough down time. Never enough days to the weekend. Not enough vacation time. Whatever.  Personally for me I like the structure of working. You end the day feeling you accomplished something. If you want to have a couple cocktails you deserve it. Smoke a couple joints if that's your thing.

A person chilling with a couple drinks isn't any better or worse than one doing other shit like watching tv, or whatever else it is people do. We aren't making this World bright with our virtues. We don't have them. In that way you and I are alike.

The rain did stop it looks like. Hopefully Hope and I don't get poured on. Today will be a day. A non workout day.  I like those.    :)  I do like workout days too though.

I guess that's good. 

Laterzzz.      :)

xoxo.     :)

xxoo.      :)

Byeeeeeee.        :)))

It Was Kinda Like A Spring Day.

Good morning. How's it going?  Me, I am fine. Yesterday was a pretty great day. First off I was able to bike to work for the first time in a couple weeks I think. I was a bundle of energy too I feel. It was sunny and mid 40°s I think on my way home. It might as well be Summer is how it felt. I ended up with just under 30,000 steps, and over 13 miles. Last week I put in over 70 miles. Just by living. Have legs, must use.

So basically yesterday was a great day. A sunny day during the dog days of Summer doesn't mean shit. A sunny day in the first warm'ish day in forever is like a whole new beginning. It's why we endure winters.  Everything starts over. More so than a New Year. I saw a gazillion joggers yesterday too. Poor treadmills must feel lonely. The promise of warm Spring days does appear to be on the horizon.

Other than that not much. We went out to dinner last night. Just for the heck of it. We didn't feel like cooking. It was a place we used to like to get a quick bike. They spent a lot of money last year remodeling, and I don't like it as much. The food is fine. Nothing outstanding. Just a place to get a burger or wrap or something. We liked the old place better though. Better atmosphere.

I gotta say I was pretty stoked yesterday though. An easy 30,000 steps,  sunshine and all. I got a guy coming out Saturday to give us a quote for our driveway. The final piece to our house. The last big project. I will have gardening to do, and we have Spring clean up, but after that not much. I am bringing my summer bike up today too.  Fat fire is going to be retired for the year. I beat the Hell out of it. The brakes are fucked, the chain is rusty as Fuck. I'll be embarrassed bringing it in for a tuneup. I don't take care of it. I beat the shit out of it in the winter.   :) 

So yeah it's a new beginning for us in the Midwest. Life starts over. I'll be pretty busy for a couple months.  Fun busy though. Stuff to do to keep me busy. I like life best this way.

Anyway, Hope and I are going for a run.

Til next time. 

Laterzzz.      :)

xoxo.       :)

xxoo.      :)

Byeeeeeeee.     :)))

One Day Off Is More Than Enough.

I get so excited for a day off, and usually by 10:00 AM I realize I got nothing more to do. I watched some Amazon Prime, and later bought a pair of shoes. See, I did watch tv, and shopped and bought some shit I didn't need. I stopped at an Applebees, and had a couple beers. Today is a work day, and I am ready. This is how my life works best. I do think when the weather is better there will be more stuff to do on my days off.

I will have to take Hope this morning to see about biking. It may be nasty wet outside. Really icy is a possibility too. It was yesterday morning when I took Hope. Really icy. That may be really wet now. Weather change is coming though.

Really outside that not much going on. Actually I am going to check the weather real quick. Hold on.  Today should be mid 40°s, and sunny. The 10 day says what I expect. Our weather has changed. Winter is probably over. That's good.

I kinda wonder what people do with downtime. I am not very good at it. Too much time of being unproductive doesn't sit well with me. Like if I spent all day watching tv, I don't feel so good about myself the next day. What do people do?  I eventually get bored and call happy hour.   :)  unfortunately that isn't the best way to live either. It's why I like working so much I think. It fills my day. My day needs filled too. I can easily function fine on probably 3 less hours of sleep each night than my wife. That's 3 extra hours to my day. My extra hours typically are early morning. When most people are asleep.

Some other things I guess I think about are my credit rating has taken a hit,  since I don't have an installment loan. I have credit cards, but carry no balance. It seems silly to get an installment loan, just to have good credit right? 

Also is it odd I am happy in my own mind?  I spose we are supposed to be social creatures, but I am cool after work doing my own thing. Is over 50 the age where we like to not go out so much?  Maybe it's just me.

I did kinda worry after yesterday about one day off running out of things to do. What will I do for 5 days in Seattle?  Then I remembered there is a whole city to check out.    Phew.    :)  I have nothing in Holland to check out. My Dad finds some shit to do. A play here, and a free film there. Some dance thing they had. He is the 2nd retired person who has lived in my house. If you are looking forward to retirement,  I hope you like tv. They do that a lot. He is in Iowa for a few days now.

Anyway I spose. I gotta run. Speaking of running, a lady I used to see out and about I haven't seen for a couple years. She kinda runs like I do now. Just to take the dog, and have fun. She didn't do races, except the occasional 5K for fun. Didn't train for speed,  but just to be active. Like me.

Today is a work day.   Yay.    :)

Laterzzz.     :)

xoxo.      :)

xxoo.      :)

Byeeeee.      :)))

Woah Baby I Am Tired.

So last night I didn't sleep through as late as I should. I don't know why. My Sunday was good. I got all my shit done, work was fine. I am up showered, and ready to start my day, but now I feel tired.

So tired I just woke up from a little cat nap.

So, anyway I have today off. I'll get my workout in pretty soon. A day off with nothing to do is pretty sweet. Sorry for those of you who have kids. You don't know of these types of days.

Actually you currently are getting your kids ready for school or will be shortly. How fun. Monday mornings are so fun.

Yesterday I got most of the next book in my series done. I've been flying through books since I started listening to them. It's just entertainment. 

Not much really going on with me. Another day is here. Another day with me not having to worry about much. I may watch movies. Maybe go shopping for things I don't need. Maybe clean my basement. Maybe none of those things.

To be free in life is not anything a person can make. To be free in life your heart has to be content in your days. We have no control of our hearts so we are powerless to feel free. It's why your life is full of shit you don't want to do.

You set out to create your ideal life,  but unknown to you it is impossible. It's your heart that does not stay consistent day in and day out. Some days you feel good about stuff, but sometimes life is a grind I suspect.

We all want a feeling of peace. That everything is okay, but it is our hearts that don't always feel that way. Maybe yours rarely/never does. There must be someone to blame for this difficult existence. The powers that be have screwed us somehow. Your heart is not able to feel content on its own. You cannot create such a thing. I can only imagine the shit that goes through people's minds.

I was thinking earlier of just my silly shit I did in my life. A lot of stuff I forgot. A never ending string of stuff one would not consider being the actions of a Saint.

Can you imagine how I could have ended up if I didn't go the way I did? I would have judged all kindsa people for being bad, and not saintly people. When in my mirror is plenty of evidence I am not better. What a hypocrite I would have turned out to be.

I was able to learn farther so I see all our shortcomings. Why we cannot be the type of people we'd like. We are born here pretty lost souls. So many will never find the way out of this hard existence. Their end will be of anger,  and hypocrites. Even that too you are powerless to change about yourself.

The World told you are a special and an amazing being. The truth suggests otherwise. We are not special,  and we aren't better than others. We have shit inside us that makes us less than we'd like, just like others.

It takes help to look at ourselves clearly. If we don't we really end up being worse people than who we can be.

Today though I have a day. I think I'll go work out now. 

Laterzzz.     :)

xoxo.     :)

xxoo.      :)

Byeeeeeee.       :)))

It Is Sunday.

So it is dark out still cuz of daylight savings. I wondered why people get mad at daylight savings. Does it really matter?  Aren't there other things to worry about?  Maybe no one gets irritated by daylight savings,  but I thought I saw rumblings before.

Yesterday was another Saturday. I worked 9 hours, and finished one book in my latest series and listened to another. That's like 15 hours of listening. Such an uneventful day.

Today I have to do my Sunday shit, and work. Sunday is a pretty nice day to work. I like my Sunday this way. Monday off is pretty sweet too.

Really not much else on my mind. After last week I guess I am recharged and ready for the busy season. Yesterday I could have finished, and worked 8 hours, but I decided to finish the last section I was working on. So I worked 9 hours. It helps I really have nothing better to do. Working,  and listening to my book is fine with me.

I don't know what people do on Saturday mornings, but I make money. I don't know what else I'd do.  I never do leave work on Saturday with less than 20,000 steps either. 

I am happy with my schedule I guess you could say. Really not much else going on with me. I ain't doing anything great here you know?  There isn't much else you really need to know about me. I am happy with my jobs. My days need to be filled up with stuff and they are. That helps me.

My age is a pretty good one. I have nothing to prove to anyone. I just do my own thing. I guess that is basically filling up my days. I ask nothing more of life. This here is good enough. I am good on my own doing this thing.

I am living happily ever after in a way I guess. It isn't what you think either. It's just being content in your days. Not expecting more out of life than it really has to offer. Not getting tied down to what people in suits say on the t.v.,  and elsewhere.

I belong to no group. Not hindered with any of that either.  I don't have to play any part. People can think bad of me, and that's fine. I am strong on my own. Not perfect yet, but strong.

Now I gotta do my Sunday shit. After my coffee, and maybe a few games of solitaire. 

Laterzzz.     :)

xoxo.     :)

xxoo.     :)

Byeeeee.    :)))

Ending The Week.

Some days you really have no idea what to do with the title. Yesterday was okay.  Work has been fun this week. It was fat Tuesday, St. Patrick's day is coming up, so is Easter, so we will be busy from here on out. I guess it's nice to have some slower weeks,  but the challenge to get everything done, and stay ahead is fun too I guess.

One of the owners made homemade caramel, which I then added to our standard base homemade donut glaze. That is about the neatest thing I've seen. I am excited to try it  today. It tasted good once I got it all mixed in, but I want to try it on a donut. Caramel is ridiculous. So much flavor out of just sugar, butter, and cream.  Who knew?  So now we have our own caramel recipe. Just like that.  We also made a Guinness glaze for this weekend til next weekend. I guess I learned something yesterday.

Other than that not much. I was surprisingly tired when I got home,  so I didn't do much. I did make dinner for the house, but I was the only one here. I say fuck it. I think I'll just do dinner by myself tonight.

You realize living with people is different. Not everyone does shit the same way, and that can be annoying I guess. We have a dishwasher, but someone the last two times decided to hand wash half the dishes, and leave water in the sink. You know stupid shit like that.

People all complain about different shit too. Everyone is wrong, except no one is looking in the fucking mirror.  I have no ideas of what people will do in the future. What percentage of people grow up to work so they can play video games during their down time?  I don't know.  It may be a lot.

I know money is not the key to happiness.  What the fuck would you do with it?   I feel more excited about a new caramel recipe than I would about a big fucking yacht. Who the fuck wants to clean a 47 room house?  Who wants to spend whatever it would cost to have it cleaned? 

You are born with no answers. You seek out fun and happiness, and your heart leads you in any number of ways. Still you have no answers. There are no authors who can teach you the way. The pen is mighty in ways, cuz being published gives you credibility I guess. Makes a person seem better than another.

Still you are here on this Earth. Living a life. Still you have no answers. The key to me is my story I guess. I've rehashed it so many times it isn't even worth talking about. An interesting story would be to see what all the people are doing now who I once sorta got to know with this thing.  Are they happy,  active, married,  divorced. Who knows you know?  In the end that doesn't even really matter. I have my own simple little life. I am excited about fucking caramel ffs. How much simpler can it get? 

I work,  I don't have bills outside of utilities. Mostly cuz of dumb luck.  I had an uncle with a lot of money,  and two people to leave it to. My life hasn't changed much I don't think. If my uncle didn't leave me money I'd still be okay, I would still have a mortgage, and we wouldn't have done as much shit as we did to the house last year.

I think I would still be the same. Work, eat, sleep,  with some chill time. Life can take you in any direction. I left my life in smarter hands than my own. So now I stand as I do now. Really without a worry. A lot of pretty cool gifts.  Energy,  an upbeat heart.  A desire to labor.  A desire to have productive days. An ability to go to sleep early, and wake up early. Also being content. You know how I said it would be interesting to see what people were up to now?  Even that doesn't matter. It affects my life none.

So, I guess I'll get another cold run in. It warms up as the day goes on. I like cold runs though. I layer up. I don't need to dress the part. I wear a pair of baggy lined pants over my pajamas. I rarely run in running pants anymore. I wear a hoody under my running jacket too.  I stay warm.

Anyways, I'll probably see you here Sunday. 

Laterzzz.     :)

xoxo.     :)

xxoo.     :)

Byeeeee.      :)))

The Saplings Have Yet To Recover From The Autumn Rains

Good morning. How's it going?  Me, I am doing good. Although,  I will say this. DO NOT eat a salad with a vinaigrette at 1:00 am. I did cuz it was there, and I love all things vinegar, but my stomach wasn't really too excited I did that. Lesson learned. No vinegar first thing in the morning.

Yesterday was pretty normal. I worked,  worked out. I did stop for a couple beers. It's been a while. It was boring. I came home,  finished my work out and made dinner. Lisa was out with friends for dinner so I went to bed super early. 

This morning I was done sleeping,  but I still thought about being able to stay in bed for 2-1/2 more hours. It is a luxury I don't take advantage of often,  but something that's there. This morning I got  up. I'll take Hope for a run in maybe the last cold day, until next winter. Cold is all relative,  but past February anything above freezing is warm. At least until our bodies acclimate to 60,70, and 80°, etc...

I have no idea what I'll do today. Work shouldn't be horrible, I don't have to work out,  so not sure what I'll do. Maybe see a movie. I don't think I thought of anything too interesting yesterday. I am just living. Doing the life thing. Day after day of stuff. My life is simple, but I don't really get bored. I listened to music last night. I never did turn on the tv. My dad and I talked some. Being old is a trip. The other day he said he went North somewhere. Then he said he was in Grand Rapids which is East. We kinda asked him about that, cuz maybe he got lost again. Somehow in his old man brain he thought Lisa was worried he was looking for a new place to live or something. That we give any thought as to what the Hell he does. I kindly reminded him his 84 year old self is not important anymore. Really we aren't even important at 54 either,  but he can be kinda ridiculous.

He kinda thinks he is the one revolving around the Sun, and the World hitches a ride on him. Maybe we all have a tad bit too much self importance we place on ourselves. Catch it now, and deal with it. At 84 it looks pretty silly. Maybe at any age.

Really besides that not much else.  I have another day today.  Not really anything to worry about. I am sorta getting excited about our trip to Seattle. It will be here before we know it. I think I am excited cuz San Antonio was such a good trip. It's cool to check out new cities. The weather will get warmer. It's been a while since I haven't thrown a hoodie on when I  get home. Pretty soon we will be sitting outside with flip flops on. It's good to do different things. Hoodie season is a good change from the dog days of Summer.

Yeah, not a lot going on with me. Coffee is in me. I think I'll poop, and take Hope. I am kinda looking forward to it. It should be fun. I guess I am recovered from vinegar stomach.    :)

Laterzzz.       :)

xoxo.     :)

xxoo.     :)

Byeeeeeeee.      :)))

You Can Use This Joke Only Once With Your Wife.

A joke that works perfectly rarely comes along. I was eating some hummus,  so I asked Lisa if she knew the difference between a Garbanzo bean, and a chick pea?  So, I told her, "I wouldn't pay money to watch a Garbonzo bean." 

She's like, "So you'd pay money to watch a chick pea?"   "Oh gross", bonk on my head.   God I laughed. 

So anyway,  how's it going?  I am doing good. I feel great actually. 6 hours and 21 minutes of sleep. That's good for me. Yesterday was pretty busy. A full day of work,  had to run the snow blower. Used the roof rake, did dishes. I had some time to just chill. Ran the robot too, which is nothing work wise, but it vacuums the house.

Other than that not much. I'll take Hope in a bit. I would assume I'll be able to bike to work next week. I am sure I still could have some days, but we had a lot of thaw freeze, and the sidewalks are pretty icy. Risk/reward you know?  Really today is how I'd like to start all days. Yesterday I just laid on the couch after this. Today I want to take Hope.

Not really a lot going on with me. Life really is pretty simple. I labor for a bit, and then do whatever. Today is a work out day so I have to do that,  and then eat dinner. Sleep too. There isn't always a lot to do with my down time. Sometimes just not stuff I want to do. You know you can always find chores,  but do you really feel like doing them?  I think I continue to get better at that year over year. Not sure why that is.

Maybe it helps I got on a good workout routine.  M,W, and F. Last year we did a ton of shit to the house, I've had a garden the last couple of years. We built a new fence in our back, resided an exterior wall with shakes,  and blah blah blah. Painted the whole house with trim. I still work ~ 48+ hours each week, except a little less the last 6-8 weeks probably. I am sitting in my breezeway which is finished, insulated,  and has a vent free heater. It actually is the warmest room in the house.  Thermostat is set to the lowest level.

So yeah for whatever reason I get more done around the house.  Of course I ain't running 50 miles per week anymore. Running makes you tired I feel.  So maybe I've always been pretty busy,  but I switched stuff. Running a gazillion miles isn't important to me, cuz I'll still have 60 miles give or take just by living. That I did  not know about myself.

I don't put a lot of stress on myself. I don't really pay attention to what I eat. I have been bringing sandwiches to work. Reason for that is I like them.  I remembered that,  so I started bringing them.  No worries about diet, no worries about exercise.  No worries about living an active life. I am free to do as I choose.  If I choose to spend money watching a chick pea.    J/k. 

What I guess I am trying to say is this thing here is super easy. Nothing to worry about.  I feel pretty good about myself,  and the days are pretty easy.

So, I guess I'll take the Hopester. 

Laterzzz.      :)

xoxo.     :)

xxoo.      :)

Byeeeeee.       :)))

The Pineapples Of Yesteryear Are Really Just Happenstance.

Good morning. How's it going?  Me, I am fine. Yesterday I slept as late as I could. Stayed in bed as late as I could I guess you could say. I kept wondering why I didn't hear my early alarms go off. Then I remembered I don't have any Monday alarms.    :)

I ate 3 paczkis yesterday. I probably will eat maybe 5 donuts all year, but I've been eating a paczki every day. They are only around for a week. It's basically a jelly filled donut.

Not really a lot going on with me. Work, eat, sleep pretty much. We have a few days of cold, and then the warm up. As we are approaching mid March we may be in Winters final sting.  Although I don't feel this has been a hard winter in the least.

There really isn't a ton of stuff to my life. Nothing to really worry about. Nothing Earth shattering to what I do.  As I come home after work I know I am always relaxed. Nothing to really stress about. I live an easy life.

I don't have anger.  I don't have heroes. I don't feel I think too highly of myself. As a person born to this World there is nothing really special about me. No redeeming quality.  I have the same BS guys are destined to deal with. Shit about us that makes us destined to be less than Saints. I've endured the wilderness so I know how uncaring my heart can be. I know I fall short from being the best a person can be, but I am okay with it. Cuz I am accepted. The final product will be taken care of at some point. I will not be the one creating this. It is out of my power. Even still I don't have to worry about it.

I don't really know other people too well. I know being a person is kinda tricky. I guess I'd say you don't know you very well either. You are "supposed" to act a certain way, but often times your heart betrays you. It is not always in step with how you are "supposed" to be. Which one is the real you?  The smiling person who just said hi to someone,  or the other part of you that silently says go fuck yourself at least 30 times each day?    :)

Life is a trap really. I guess that is one good thing about me. I know me. I know on my own I can not be as strong and confident as I am.  I know the truth about me, and I know our shortcomings.  I remember it not always being easy.  During the journey I wanted to be right, but that wasn't in the cards.  I was tired of feeling judged. It is also hard to live in fear.  Yet here I stand. Not being the best a person can be, but very secure in my future.

Anyways, I spose. 

Laterzzz.      :)

xoxo.      :)

xxoo.      :)

Byeeeee.        :)))

A Change In Schedule.

Good morning. How's it going?  Me, I am good. I have all of today off, cuz of fat Tuesday. Regular 3rd shifters work tonight,  and I work tomorrow. I am up way early today, but I guess that's good. I gotta be up early tomorrow.

Yesterday was just your kinda typical work Saturday. I did work for 4 hours or so at a building I haven't worked in for a few years. It's definitely changed since the last time I was there. It was kinda strange.

I then saw the movie Greta, which was suspenseful. I came home,  and started watching the new Kate Beckinsale show. Just your typical boring day I guess. A boring day is fine by me. I'll do my typical Sunday shit today, and then I'm not sure. I guess I could go shopping for a meal.

I am not really sure what I'll do. We will have 3-4 days of cold weather, and then I think perhaps a little warm up. Maybe Winter will be over. At this stage 35° is warm. Super comfortable.   :)

What else?  Not really much.  I guess pretty shortly work will start to pick up slightly. My Saturday job always need full time help. Dependable people are helpful in that job. Last week they had some call ins. I guess that's a problem cuz we have attendance bonuses. I rarely call in sick. Probably under 10 times my whole life. 3 days with pneumonia,  one day cuz I was mad or something when I worked at the local lumber yard. Once this thanksgiving, cuz I was puking and ass pissing. I think that's it. I just am naturally pretty healthy I guess.

We will see what this year is like. It should be busy. The weather will turn warm. I don't really know what to expect. I guess I'll stay busy doing what I do.

I'll hit publish to this thing. Obviously not a lot on my mind. There is one thing. Just something that happened yesterday. I thought I was going to be asked to go full time at my Saturday job. It never did get asked,  but me and the guy I worked with both thought so. It made me wonder what that would be like.

I work 1st shift now,  and obviously that suits me. I make good money at both places. My bakery job, I am friends with the owners.  I've had a good working relationship with my Saturday job people.

It just made me wonder what life would be like with a change. Not that I am looking for a change, but you know how you wonder about stuff as an opportunity arises?

That was on my mind.  That's it though. Today is a day, and so is tomorrow.

Laterzzz.      :)

xoxo.     :)

xxoo.     :)

Byeeeee.       :)))

The Years First.

Good morning. How's it going?  Me, I am fine. I think yesterday was the first day this year I slept til my late alarm. I must have stayed  up a little late. Yesterday I watched a bunch of t.v.  I finished the Hunter season,  I had a couple episodes left. I watched a movie. It was good. Interesting.  You know how you see a movie,  and you wonder how that person thinks?  I say it's a good movie if you try to get in the character's head. Then I watched 3-1/2 episodes of Frasier, and woke up on the couch at 10:30.

Today I got out of bed, and had one of my i don't feel like coffee mornings. So basically just another day I guess. Today should be an easy day of work. I'll work out, and maybe squeeze in a movie if the times line up.

Nothing really important going on with me. Not much in my mind. Not much to worry about. My life is pretty set in how I do things.  I am not anxious about the future. I really don't have much stress in my life. A day pops up,  and I am usually cool with it. I wake up the same every day it seems. I imagine the typical person tries to find a good life. One in which you are happy every day. Content. I guess I've done that. I can't take credit for how I feel every day though.

I didn't construct my life in such a way for me to be like this. I guess I looked long term. Toward the end, cuz I viewed death as a real thing. I saw what is of value to do now during the living years so that ending is worth it or whatever. There was nothing of value to do during the living years. That ending overshadows all.

So my life went in the direction I saw best. I had no play book or anything. Then my story started. It is mostly hidden. You cannot really know me all that great, cuz you cannot fathom the shoes I've walked in. It's beyond your realm of possibilities.

So I stand now with my easy life. Made easy because my heart is made to be care free. I do have to suffer once more at some point, and that is so I can finally be who I wanted to be. The best a person can be. I am pretty sure most/all of this guy who once was a kid will no longer be. I'll be someone completely different. It's the wineskin parable. That which makes me mostly spirit now cannot hold my new insides so it has to be remade. It will be made during my suffering, cuz that is the way for this thing. It's how it works.

How I am then compared to how you will be I am not really sure. I've had an extra step in my story, so I really know very little.

I just know I am here today. Living the life you dream of.  The one where you wake up every day, and everything is fine. If I am not respected by my peers I don't care. If I am, I'd be the last to know, and that's cool too.    :)

Anyway I spose.  Today should be pretty easy.

Laterzzz.     :)

xoxo.     :)

xxoo.      :)

Byeeeee.        :)))