Thursday, May 31, 2018

Yesterday Was A Day.

Good morning. How's it going?  Me, I am fine. Yesterday was a day, and it was okay I guess. Work was work, and we'll be pretty busy the rest of the Summer. Busier after school gets out, which approaches. I got one trip of crap to the storage unit. For a small looking room you can put a bunch of crap in it. I got a good amount of my dad's stuff in there, and still have 80% of the space left. Out of sight = out of mind.

We went out to dinner at definitely our favorite Mexican restaurant. There is none better really. It always is pretty full, and their service is quick. Food is ridiculously good,  and you cannot eat the whole meal.

Other than that not much. I couldn't find the audio book for my 5th book of my Scarpetti series. So the library held the actual book for me, and I picked it up. Patricia Cornwall is the author, and the Scarpetti series is 25-30 books I believe. I have a ways to go.

That was the day. I worked, I ate, and I slept. Today I have to bring more shit to the storage unit. Maybe cut the grass too if it's not too wet.

As you can see I am pretty busy, but not with anything terribly exciting. I'll be busy a while getting the outside taken care of. We are painting the house too. We have a few things to do first though.

I am glad to get my Dad here, but he can be annoying. I wouldn't be against shipping old people to another planet. He's one of those guys that complain at restaurants about this is too cold or whatever. Last night we had shock in our eyes as I basically told him to stfu. I think if he does it again I'll tell him never with us. If you are out on your own whatever, but we don't do that just to hear us speak.

Aging really isn't that graceful a thing. Everybody is out making their own story, and I suspect it isn't very graceful. You hear stories about people just being shitty to people. Just in my neighborhood I saw it. Just one guy being shitty to another and trying to pick a fight. I don't want to see two middle aged men under 5 foot five, but over 230 lbs. fighting each  other. One once carried a badge, and one was brown in skin color. The badge guy is new to the neighborhood,  and has always been fine to me. Maybe the brown skin color added a bit to the disagreement. I dont feel the white guy is in the right at all. Basically telling the brown guy where he can park his car in his own yard. The guy my Dad tried being an ass too was brown too. Who knows? 

Is it worth getting upset over small shit?  For me, I don't want to live that way. I have a simple life I try to make simpler. I'll just keep plugging along doing my own thing. I think I typically mind my own business.

I am a person living in a World where I know the truth. In your trust of your life matters I know the opposite is true. No lives matter, so don't be an ass over stupid shit.

Maybe people feel the need to elevate themself over others.  I don't know. I think I tune out those who do such stuff.

Who knows? 

I gotta run.

Laterzzz.   :)

xoxo.    :)

xxoo.   :)

Wednesday, May 30, 2018

Been A Little Busy.

So, I've been pretty busy. I know, I know who hasn't been?  We did get my Dad moved to Holland. It went fine. He wasn't real organized,  so his place was a mess, and we just threw a bunch of shit out. He still has too much stuff, but we got a storage unit. Stuff eventually just gets thrown away, or given away.

I think this week everything will get pretty settled,  and we will be back to our normal routines. Speaking of routines I didn't sleep great on Monday night, but still I felt better for working. For me working is a productive way to fill the hours of the day.  No matter what, you did stuff.

In just a few days I suspect my Dad realizes he is on the home stretch. There is nothing else to do, but live out your days. I am lucky enough to know that at 50. I have nothing to accomplish,  but work,  eat, sleep. Basically live out my days.

I guess I've known for a while there really isn't anything remarkabke about our lives. We aren't doing anything great. I suspect motives typically are filled with wiifm. The funny thing about life is in the end there is nothing in it for us. We bought stuff that in the end is garbage. We sought honor someway in our brilliant deeds, which aren't brilliant. Just shit we've done.

There really aren't any honorable lives. We're really just killing time as the song suggests. We're here for a short time, and dead much longer.

In a short time I got rid of a ton of crap two people have accumulated. Their lives like mine really don't equate to much. I know this like I said at the age of 50, so I don't have to carry a ton of excess baggage like what life is "supposed" to be. Nope, work, eat, sleep is fine for me.

Anyhoo, I guess that's good.

Til next time. 

xoxo.   :)

xxoo.   :)

Thursday, May 24, 2018

There You Have It.

I got a good night sleep on Tuesday, and I got stuff done after work. Mowed the grass,  watered the garden, brought my hose reel from the shed to the front, and fixed my pavers we use for a walkway.

We did burgers on the grill. I used my scale, and weighed them at 8 oz. It was a little much, as I could only eat half of it. I like the idea of scaling the burgers though. I think I'll stick with 1/3 lb. or 1/4 lb. From now on.

It was just a good Spring day I guess. It was sunny, and around 70°  other than that not much. June 1st is coming up, and it will be the first time in forever I won't have a mortgage payment to be deducted from my account. That is an extra $830'ish extra money in my pocket every month.

I guess as far as doing the living thing everything seems okay. I work jobs I like. I have more money coming in than I need. I am pretty happy and content with my little life. I don't have much stress. I have enough things to keep me busy. Regardless of everything I wake up like this most days. Without a care in the World really.

People have tried going into the wild, or ventured at living at Waldon Pond to have what I have. What those people didn't know was they do not control their own heart. Their mistake was not knowing that powers outside their control were the masters of them.  You can find that by looking at yourself throughout the day.

You know you should typically feel and think a certain way most times about stuff. You'll see however inside you is judgement, and anger, and annoyance, and shit like that. You see it's there,  but you don't know the cause. We all are in the same boat too. Less than perfect,  and really no clue what perfect is really.

The path to getting to know yourself is no joke. It is nothing you can even imagine either. The truth is we think we are these pretty significant beings with pretty remarkable abilities. We should be counted as the grass blades are counted. That really is what our worth is. The World has been placing false values on  everything since forever,  and you are a creature of this World being well versed in accepting false values for everything. Your own importance being #1.

Anyway,  guess I better get going. My BIL is coming with me to help move my Dad, and drive one of the vehicles home. I'll drive the truck,  and he'll take Lisa's car home. Lisa will stay home fixing the inside. Should be pretty smooth,  and I'll take everyone out to dinner Saturday night. It should be a pretty okay time.

Anyway, let's see what today brings.

Til next time. 

Laterzzz.   :)

xoxo.   :)

xxoo.   :)

Wednesday, May 23, 2018

The Era Of Bad Hairstyles.

Good morning. How's it going?  I am fine. I slept better last night than the day before.  I was fine yesterday,  just tired after work.  I was even dozing a bit when I sat down.  So, I got nothing done after work. Our new A.C. is in, and it looks pretty nifty. It was actually more expensive than my furnace I had installed. It is a nice luxury. Window air conditioners work fine, but we would have to section off our rooms, and bathroom. It wouldn't do our whole living space. 90° and humid is horrible to try and sleep in.

Other than that not much going on.  I don't really have much to write about either. I guess if you remember me saying me growing up in the 'burbs of Chicago had no say in who I am. It played no part.  The true can be said of people too I guess. No person helped shape me.  A long time ago I went the way I did. It made me my own person I guess.

In so doing I lost all the baggage one carries from just growing up. There is nothing in my past that really matters I guess. I have no excuses for not being perfect. I am accepted I guess, and I guess it helps me be light hearted. We all are less than perfect, so who can anyone really impress? 

In that light our lives are pretty boring huh?  If are deeds are worthless,  than what are we struggling for? 

For one I guess I don't struggle for anything. I am not trying to make some type of name for myself. I definitely am not trying to be famous. I have no fairy tales I believe in to cloud my judgement. Out of thin air my heart is just content. A gift, and something in any daily,  yearly struggle I could not make for myself.

As this goes on there is less and less of me, and one wonders if anyone will actually ever get to know anyone else. I let you know me, cuz I live in the light,  and the darkness doesn't scare me.

We all are born in the dark though. Unable to see inside ourself. That remains the case too til your death. There is only one way to change that. I unknowingly went in that direction,  cuz I didn't see the point in anything else. Most of you have lived long enough to know no one is perfect, and your hearts aren't perfect either.

In the end I really wanted to be a good person,  but it was impossible. What does  it even mean? 

As I went my way my struggle was done with great fear, cuz I knew the end that was in store for me if something didn't change. Security before perfection. Who knew? I sure didn't. I was ready to suffer for what I wanted most.  The end of fear.

My path was scary. The wilderness the worst. I am where I am now though, and this ain't too shabby. What that means for you I have no clue. We definitely are in uncharted waters. It makes me distant in a way I guess. You can't impress with deeds though. They don't matter, so where is our value? 

Anyhoo, I guess that's good. I am afraid to go outside. I think one of our cats is terrorizing something.

Gotta run.

Til next time.

Laterzzz.  

xoxo.   :)

xxoo.  :)

Tuesday, May 22, 2018

It's Been A Bit.

Good morning. How's it going?  I am fine. I haven't blogged in a bit. Sunday I went in at 2:00 AM instead of 7:00 AM, and yesterday I had to do a few things before the A.C. guys came. They are all prepped for the final install. They couldn't do it all yesterday, cuz it rained all day. I didn't even think about it. You typically don't want to run electricity in the rain.  Makes sense.

We took our 2nd and last free load to the dump. Got rid of more shit. We moved our bed to our new room. We are giving my Dad our room. It's bigger. Things will be a bit chaotic for a week or two perhaps, but I have a bed to sleep in, and I'll have food to eat. Really you don't need anything else. I thought of that earlier while laying in bed. No matter what I will be sleeping at night comfortably.

I don't know really what else there is to stress about. We declutter as we go along. I got rid of even more clothes too. I have 3 pair of jeans. 2 dress shirts,  and one dress pant. Shorts, underwear, and shirts for work,  and casual, and socks.

I pretty much spend zero dollars on clothes. If I need another pair of jeans I'll buy a pair or two.

We still will be busy with stuff, but first things first. Get my Dad moved.

Life continues to go on. I continue to work,  eat my nightly meal, and always have time to chill out a bit. I guess what I am saying is there is nothing for me to stress out about really. In my immediate family remain my brother and Dad. They both will be living in Holland before June is out. No Pejchls in Chicago, and none dealing with any crazy traffic anymore. 

I don't really have anything to say about the Suburbs of Chicago, except it had no say in who my 51 year old self is. It is no part of me, and I never have missed it.

Holland is pretty simple, just cuz you never really have to travel more than a few miles to do what you want. I typically don't either. That's pretty simple.

Anyway, I gotta go. Hope wants a little run.

Til tomorrow probably. 

Laterzzz.  :)

xoxo.   :)

xxoo.    :)

Thursday, May 17, 2018

Keep Moving Forward

Good morning. How's it going?  I am fine. Yesterday I had one of those days where progress forward undoes stress. I've been feeling a bit overwhelmed with all that needs to get done. Progress forward = wipes it away. I got a lot done yesterday, which makes me think everything is doable. Truck to move my Dad is reserved. We are switching out our slider for a French door. I scheduled a handyman to help me with that. Some guy I met at a bar.  We started talking. I told him I don't need anything done, but I took his number down just in case. Lisa got the door at work for $100, and we were not happy with our slider anyway. French doors are kinda cool too.

The plants I bought are in the garden. I was looking at the garden, and I can almost double the size. All I need to get is zuchinni, and beans,  and I may add more stuff too, since I'll have a bigger garden.

It was just a day though, where getting a little done helps my disposition I guess. I only had to cook for myself, and I made steak fajitas. Just a pretty good day I guess.

I did talk to my Dad too. I was kinda worried about his huge desk he had. I saw it when I was up last. He doesn't need it.  That is huge, we don't have to move it. I remember seeing it thinking it was nice, but big. We don't have to take it. He seems intent on keeping the minimum, and in pretty giid spirits too. There is a Health club free in Holland for people over 50 I'll get him signed up for. He can meet people,  and stuff. He won't have financial stress either, cuz that is taken care of. In this house as long as people can accept people all will be fine. No one in this house is perfect, and none of us are saints, but if you don't judge too harshly, and mostly accept,  all can get along.

We will look at other places too. I guess I am just glad it will all be done soon. My Dad will live out his final years having plenty of home cooked meals. It's probably what he missed most the last 30 years I bet. He probably doesn't know it though.

So, I guess that was the day. I got a lot done, and it makes everything look good.

Not much else for me. 

Laterzzz.   :)

xoxo.    :)

xxoo.   :)

Wednesday, May 16, 2018

Finally The Rain Stopped.

Good morning. How's it going?  I am fine. I got a good sleep last night. Slept extra too. Yesterday went pretty good. My A.C. guy left his voltage tester at a previous job, and I couldn't find mine, so he is coming back today. We already figured where we will put the A.C.,  but have to make sure I get power in this other box I have. I am sure I do, but gotta test it to make sure. There is a breaker for an electric range. It is gas now.

I cut the grass, so that is good. I used the trimmer too which still works. It is like 18 years young. I am ready anytime to get a new one, but I guess I don't need to. I went and got tomato plants, and cucumber plants too. I think getting outside,  and getting some work done is good for you. At least it seems to me.  I think it made my day.

Other than that not too much.  I really want to get my Dad moved. I want it over really. It will be a pain in the butt. He wanted to talk to me about something. God only knows what. The way he is, and the way he gets around I think he should be ready to live out his final years, trying to enjoy little things. I have a feeling he still thinks he is going to find the fountain of youth. If you are old you should accept it. It will make things easier. I have a feeling a story about him being cheated will be his story, but at my age he was in my position financially. His wife died, and his house was paid off. He owned 2 properties in Normal, IL. If he got a job for 20 years doing whatever he'd be fine. I don't know what he did to be honest.

I think back to him, and my Uncle,  and I don't think they cooked many meals. You cannot eat out all the time. Cooking isn't hard at all, and probably a good thing to learn for all people. The meal at the end of the day should be a highlight I think.

I am glad though my garden will be in before Memorial day. I am glad I got outside. I cannot help to think of all the people who do not cook their own meals.

I guess I wonder kinda what people think life should be. I wonder what they think on the inside I guess.  I suppose all judge really,  cuz when others are wrong, than we are right, right?

Life is surely strange, and people stranger I guess.

Anyhoo, I gotta go. 

Til next time. 

xoxo.   :)

xxoo.   :)

Tuesday, May 15, 2018

We Got Some Done.

So, I had my Monday off. We got some stuff done. We are basically moving our room to the craft room. Taking a little inventory of stuff, I really don't have much. I don't need much in the way of clothes, and I don't have much. Work shirts, jeans, shorts,  and one pair of pants for dress. Lisa on the other hand holy shit. She could give 2/3rds of her clothes away, and still have way more than she needs. She should too.

She is attached to pieces of furniture too. It is good we are moving our room, cuz there is more shit we can get rid of. Stuff has a tendency to gather just while we live. It is probably good to go through,  and get rid of stuff frequently.

I gather people like to collect stuff, and in the end it costs money, and adds to work in the long run. When in doubt throw it out is a good philosophy to live by.  Someone will always eventually have to deal with the shit you accumulate.

We really only need a little amount of clothes. A bed, couch,  and chairs to lounge in. Stuff to cook meals,  and store food. The hoarding mentality just makes everyone's life harder really. 

At the age of 51 I think it is probably better to simplify things than make things harder. Less Is more in life in most things. Less responsibility = less stress really.

I think internally people always strive for more, and want more, cuz hearts typically strive after wind. Never satisfied. We'll be moving my Dad up here soon, and I keep thinking about him keeping that stupid bike. We dont get better, and smarter with age. My uncle kept, and moved work papers from like 40 years ago.

I guess now I think everyone is probably messed up in ways. Our hearts are constructed in such a way we make our lives harder. Striving for more, and more stuff means you put on yourself more and more stress.

In life there is a balance, but hearts cannot comprehend.  We aren't made to. We were made to be neurotic to the bones no doubt about it. (Cannot remember what song those lyrics came from)

Anyway, today,  I'll do the grass, it rained yesterday. I decided with all the rain I won't get a rototiller. The ground is as soft as can be.

I guess today I'll have a day. I'll be busy. My A.C. guy is coming,  but that will only take a minute. I am getting one quote.  His,  he's my guy. So basically just scheduling it really.  There will be a dinner, and I guess that's good.

Okee doke.

I'll cya.

xoxo.   :)

xxoo.   :)

Monday, May 14, 2018

Monday Monday.

Good morning. How's it going?  Me, I am okay. All in all my Sundays will be like a 13 hour work day. It seems like a lot, but it is two places. At the bakery I fry the donuts on Sunday as the main part, and it is fast paced really. It was my 2nd time doing the donuts,  and it really isn't rocket science. I'll get better, and quicker,  and more efficient etc...  I really do like the jobs I work.

My brother accepted the offer he got on my Uncle's townhouse,  so everything will be settled in late June. All assets liquidated,  and he'll just have to pay taxes on whatever capital gains there were on the assets.  We split the proceeds, which were already considerable. After paying off my house this last part is minor for me. I won't be doing anything with the money, but investing in boring old investments. Zero stock market exposure,  as I don't trust it. So I won't be making potentially great gains,  although I do believe interest rates will rise,  and that  equates to a better rate of return on what is considered safer investments.

I don't have a house payment,  so all the money we make goes to utilities,  taxes, and savings. 

Anyway, enough about that stuff. It's just my life. It's been pretty simple for a while.   There hasn't been a ton to worry about I guess. I don't have any great hobbies. I don't do any really exciting things like travel, and whatever people consider exciting, and yet in life I miss out on nothing. My secret is how I feel on the inside. That doesn't come from me. There is no secret diet, and no secret exercise.   There is just my story.  

What I have is what everyone secretly wants. An indifference to the World,  and a feeling of contentment. The path of you will always leave you wanting.  The path of us is a dead end. No hope for what we really want. It would be interesting to see the inside of people, but all we get is pictures of how great everything is.

I wonder if people even can see inside themself. 

Who knows?

Anyway, I have a day off to have.

Guess I better get to it.

Cya.   :)

xoxo.   :)

xxoo.    :)

Sunday, May 13, 2018

The Avenue Around Western Rail Theater

Good morning. How's it going?  Me, I am fine. I finished another book in the Kay Scarpetti series. They are written by Patricia Cornwell. Kay is a forensic pathologist who works on mysteries. I finished 2 of 20 something in the series. I downloaded #3 in the series.

I don't listen to books much outside of Saturday. I listen to books while working.  It's a win win. I am working making money, and being entertained listening to a book. Luckily I am old enough so going to bed early on Friday isn't a big deal. I start work at 5:00AM on Saturday.

We had a little ground water make its way into our basement. Not a lot, just a little. I woke up thinking that is a lot of rain. Pretty annoying. I looked around downstairs,  and it was only in two areas. Weird. One was in the middle of the basement next to no walls. The other was by our sewage pump, but it was just water. No one was showering, or using the bathroom in the middle of the night. The walls were dry too. One of those annoying things that just happen I guess.  We did get a lot of rain in a short amount of time. I'll have to cut the grass on Monday.

Other than that not much. I really didn't do much outside of work. Checked out the basement, and finished my book. The basement was real minor. My text from Lisa made it sound worse. The whole basement was dry,  except for two parts. I slept last night pretty good. I think I was tired. I dreamt, I was putting water, and gas where the oil goes in the car, and accidentally starting it on fire. I was not happy with my stupidity there.

I work two jobs today, and have all of  Monday off. I'll be busy for, you know probably the whole Summer.  A lot to do.  I'll just plug along. I typically find time each day to relax, and chill.

That pretty much is the main thing on my mind these days. Get all the things done I want this Summer. Mostly outside house shit.

Other than that not much at all. Live my day by day as it comes. My days typically start out the same.

You know, I really got nothing. I'll have a day today of work.  It should be pretty okay I think. One of the best things of working 3:00PM -11:00PM on Sunday is around 8:00PM. I consider everyone dreading Monday morning, while I'll have it off.  I wonder how many people will wake up groggy on Monday,  cuz of too much drinking on Sunday.  It's my favorite.   :)  I like imagining people's misery I guess. I don't know.

Anyhoo,  I am out. 

Have fun.   :)

xoxo.    :)

xxoo.   :)

Friday, May 11, 2018

So, This Was A Week.

So anyway it is official. I am a homeowner with zero mortgage. My house is bought and paid for. One year ago things looked good. I refinanced my house, and put on a new roof. My main job paid for my mortgage + extra every month. My other jobs, and Lisa's job went to another bank to pay utilities and stuff. We were fine. Now we are ridiculous.

How does it feel?  The initial shock wears off quickly, and you still got your routine. The days keep coming. I have no concerns really about money, but I didn't beforehand either. I did pay for tickets to one of Lisa's favorite hair bands from the 80s. Firehouse. So, we'll make a night of it.

Other than that no major plans. We got shit to do around the house. I have my furnace guy coming to quote us for A.C. on Tuesday. We planned on that anyway.

I went to bed early last night cuz I wanted a good night sleep. I've been sleeping in this week. Staying up too late and shit. I want to take Hope in the morning too, cuz I got shit to do after work.

So, I guess life goes along as usual. I have zero financial concerns in a World where I guess that may be the norm. It wasn't from great plans on my part or great discipline. I haven't had a car payment in forever,  except that $100/month one we had with the pt cruiser. Mostly by dumb luck I find myself in the position I am in. People play the lottery to be like this,  and I won without playing.

All things are relative, so I ain't a millionaire,  and no plans on being one.  I am more than content living in my house, working my jobs, and having a meal to end the day.

Not really much changes. I don't know what other people would do in my shoes. Maybe take an epic vacation, but I am uninterested in the World. I am happy and content living where I do. The grass for as long as the wait has gone on has always been greener in my head.

So I seek no greater life than the one I currently live.

Life is pretty easy for me, and just made easier.

Crazy huh?

Anyhoo,  I guess that's good.

Have fun.   :)

xoxo.   :)

xxoo.   :)

Laterzzz.   :)

Tuesday, May 8, 2018

A Day Unlike Any other.

No really. It was. I paid off my mortgage. Done. I have zero debt outside my Discover I use once in a while for the cash back thingy. I pay it off every month. Got a statement yesterday, and paid off the $60 balance or whatever.

What is my secret to being debt free at the age of 51?  I planned on being born at such a time when I knew my Dad would meet... never mind. I had an Uncle with a lot of money, and only my brother and I to give it to.

What does it feel like being debt free, and with  a crap ton of money in my accounts?  Who knows?  I'll still do the same things. I don't want any toys, or Summer houses or anything. Everything will be the same. I woke up hungry today, and already ate 2 packets of ramen noodles. I didn't crack open the caviar, which I don't have.

Today I am up early eating noodles,  and doing the blog thing. I was thinking earlier what would I want most out of life.  I considered at some point there will be some shitty ending,  so being at rest already (aka not alive) is the best one can really hope for.

We are alive though, and the day by days continue. I do my fair share in waking up with plenty of energy. I do my work thing, and I am content.

I have no outstanding plans to create the best life ever, cuz I am just content doing what I do. Perhaps I am risk adverse, or perhaps I just don't want 8 million things running through my mind every day.

Yesterday we totally cleaned our garage. Took two trips to the restore to get rid of lumber. I took down the stupidest shelving system ever created in a garage. It only took us 20 years to think to decon that piece of shit. The lumber went to the restore,  and we have a lot more room. We are going to get another pass next week to the dump. Unload more shit.

Yesterday was a pretty good day. We got a lot done. I did go shopping for my rototiller, but it wasn't on sale. The local lumber yard I used to work at had 80 million carts in the corral. Lisa said it looked a lot like Wal-Mart. They only had 10 cashiers on the payroll one of the cashiers said. They are open like 100 hours/week.

Needless to say the Economy is pretty robust in West MI. Perhaps too robust. A bubble maybe. You can't make money at the banks, so perhaps another housing bubble.

I am debt free though, so I am further down the chain of any catastrophic event.

Anyway, I am out. 

Have fun.   :)

xoxo.    :)

xxoo.   :)

Laterzzz.    :)

Friday, May 4, 2018

Not Everything Gets Done As Plannned.

Good morning. How's it going?  Me, I am fine. I never did get my rototiller yesterday. I drove to work too,  so it would have been ideal. After work I thought shopping?!?  Blah. So I went home. All wasn't lost though, cuz we made plans to move my Dad to Holland. Uhaul is the way to go. My Dad is in his later years, and he shouldn't be living alone anymore. He does not get around as he used to, but his mind seems fine.

For someone who never wanted kids I sure have had a lot of people live here. I don't mind it either, as long as they pay their fair share of rent, which is cheap. I never wanted  to support anyone,  cuz Lisa and I have always scraped by. Nothing really was ever easy,  but I don't recall stressing about stuff too much. We've always worked,  so we always had money coming in.

Also for a very long time I was just waiting for my end game. The final part of my story,  so I wasn't looking toward any future, except being transformed into the best a person can be. I didn't really know how my story would go. I knew the endgame, but I didn't know I would have days like this you know?  Living out my days as I wish.

I am not angry about anything. The World is probably a mess, but I don't care. I really have no use for news and politics, and stuff like that. I don't need much I guess, but I do enjoy my day to day.

I guess you probably get the picture through here. My heart is happy cuz that is a gift. These days here are a gift too, cuz I never expected them. I guess I was always just waiting to suffer.

At this stage I guess I know a lot of what has been hidden for a very long time. I don't know, I don't feel it's worth talking about anyway.  For one I've done it to death. For two everyone is still very much a part of this World. Not really any different than what you were born into. I can see some people who are just plain angry, and I know it overpowers them. I know what makes you this way too. It is out of your power to heal you too.

Seeking a content heart is a good thing,  cuz without it one carries much baggage.

We were born into carrying baggage. Like the dude on the cover of the stairway to heaven album. We had our bundle of sticks,  and we called it our burden to get into heaven. It actually is your burden as you head to 6'under. It has nothing to do with heaven, but people change the story,  they changed the words so they are justified in their own minds.

You'll find the truth will teach, you assumed a lot, and accepted as truth stuff that isn't. In your seeking truth you fell short. You just don't know it.

Life had to sting me pretty good for me to go further by questioning everything. I questioned what I believed, upbringing,  country... everything. In the end I threw everything out, cuz to see the truth you have to start naked. You can't hold onto the shit you have your whole life.

The World does not matter. Country doesn't matter,  and I suggest life is much better without carrying your bundle of sticks. They just make your back sore. 

Anyhoo,  guess it's time to take Hope.

Have fun.   :)

xoxo.   :)

xxoo.   :)

Laterzzz.   :)

Thursday, May 3, 2018

Less Is More.

So yesterday I was kinda riled up thinking of all the things that need to get done. I realized yesterday everything doesn't need to get done in one week. A little prioritizing, and maybe everything is doable. A new driveway can be this Fall. Shit like that. It is raining today, so I am driving to work,  and buying a rototiller after. I thought of renting one, but I'll use it every year, and I don't know I think it will be handy.

I got a little project done yesterday. Just added a layer of retaining block to a little garden. I put pea gravel under the first layer.  There still is a lot to do, but I have time on my hands.

I think maybe I have a little more pep in my step, since I spend a good amount outside again. Maybe a little vitamin D deficiency. Who knows?  I know once we hit the middle of Summer warm weather is boring again. I am as excited about Fall as I am Spring I guess. Change change change is good for the soul type of thing.

You eat different foods,  and different meals depending on the season. I think yesterday was such a good day cuz I worked a full shift plus. I did get some shit done at home. I also took a trip to get stuff to grill.   I wasn't a complete worthless piece of shit, but after dinner I crashed. My day was one of those 13+ mile days too. I don't know how much I'll walk today, cuz my watch fell off somewhere.  No clue where it's at.  :)

As you can tell just another day for me. Today is starting the same way too. Another day to be lived. I think I'll make the most of it. One of these days this never-ending consecutive days does end. I am not tangled up in anything that won't let me live out my days.

I think I'll drink my coffee. 

Laterzzz.    :)

xoxo.   :)

xxoo.    :)

Wednesday, May 2, 2018

Life Sure Is Busy.

Good morning. How's it going?  Me, I am fine. I have a lot on my mind these days. Just shit that needs to get done. I need to write a list so I can just start knocking shit off it. My life is going to get busier for a while before it doesn't.  Maybe Spring is always that way. There are only so many hours in the day, and any route you take takes time away from other shit.

In life there only is one correct route, and few take it. All the busyness,  and messiness of the World means nothing as far as our final balance sheet getting graded. Our activities are just that. Activities. They don't really mean anything.  It's just shit we do.

As far as the World goes I see there is no correct path. Human weakness makes everything pretty hard. Time makes everything hard. We need sleep,  and stuff, and time used for one endeavor is time taken from another.

My life right now is busier than shit, but my final balance sheet of life will not be lacking. I went the right way. As far as responsibilities go,  I have none really. I do what my heart likes,  and that is basically work, eat, sleep.

I owe no one anything really. Yet I guess I still am willing to help out. You never know how things in life will turn out, but I don't worry one way or another. Mostly cuz I don't have anything to worry about.

I am strong in that it does not matter what people think of me. My heart is mostly happy cuz it is soooo easy just being me.

If you have stressful things going on in your life I don't know of such stuff too much. I simply don't have much to worry about except my stupid ever-growing to do list I haven't made yet. It's all fun, and I really see no way of me getting everything done, but you never know. 

Anyhoo, thus is just me doing what I do. 

Have fun.   :)

xoxo.    :)

xxoo.   :)

Laterzzz.    :)

Tuesday, May 1, 2018

A Pretty Good Monday.

So, I had my first Monday off. It was pretty productive, as you hope most days off go. All my laundry is folded and put away. I finished up our new and improved pantry. It was done, but we figured we could add another shelf,  do I did that.  More storage is always good. Dishes are done etc...  I finished our back fence too. There was around a 12' section we weren't happy with how we hung the pickets, so we took them down. And screwed them back up the way we wanted them. I used 10' 4x4s on our fence, so I could go 36" down to cement them. That is around our freeze line, so that made sense to me. I don't think people do that for fences, but whatever. It isn't worse that's for sure. 10' is high though,  so I FINALLY used the recip saw to cut the tops below the top of the fence.

That is a Monday. Outside of that not too much. I wake up this morning knowing Monday was productive,  but now my mind is on all kindsa other projects that need to be done. It's going to be a busy Summer.

It is supposed to be warm today, so I'll have to get some more stuff done outside. So much to do.

Life still goes on as normal. It still will have a day filled with work, and there will be a meal at the end of it. I am really excited for this Summer. I am running a bit, but I am not tiring myself out. I typically walk 20,000 steps on any given work day. The big days I hover around 13 miles give or take. Just by living, and I am happy about that. On a day off it is hard to walk 10,000 steps. I find that to be crazy. I really had no idea I walked this much by working.

So really just some more days in this life. I ain't doing anything important. In the end I matter not one bit really. It's a good thing to know. It's a good thing to accept too I guess, but life is easy for me. No stress really. Not much anyway. I am excited to start each day. It just is good to be me I guess.

Anyways, I got nothing really. Just a little excitement to start another day.

Til next time.   :)

xoxo.   :)

xxoo.   :)

Laterzzz.    :)