Well good afternoon all. How's it going?? Me, I guess I am doing okay. I am starting my weekend now with two nights off in a row. I don't have much planned today, actually nothing at all. I don't really have anything to blog about today either, but I did think of some things last night.
Things and ways I am different. Things you cannot understand, but I have been this way for a long time. Since before my Summer of Discontent. Anyway I was on "lunch" at work. (If lunch is such a thing at 4:00 AM. I didn't eat. :) I thought I'd see if I could take a little nap. I closed my eyes, and then my eyes in my head were wide open. I saw everything clearly. I saw who I am, and I saw everything about me can be seen. I don't get that clear of a look too often, but I spose I could get it almost whenever I want.
So, I am different. I am at an advantage. I know how people are, and how they see, because I was like that too way back in the day. You cannot see how I see. Although when you can, you will be surprised I bet. Surprised I have kept it to myself for so long. How can I tell?? What would I say??
I know some things inside you that you don't. Things you don't know, comprehend, understand etc... I leave these things for you to figure out, because it is not my place... I don't think. You have stuff to overcome. The weak little voice you has to overcome that which overpowers you.
I have lived a crazy life, and it is a crazy story, and it was a long and hard journey. I would never have made it without help, and I had to struggle, and suffer much. My whole life was to get to a point where I can help really. As the stories go though few listened, few believed, and why is that?? One wonders...
If you have been given good information though, and you hardened your hearts, and said, "Nah that can't be it." "I got my own things to do." All this is to teach you the power of forgiveness. A power we don't have in us. We cannot do these good things on our own, because we were born into this World. This World is a World of hate where whatever teachings/propaganda of Society we hold onto, they just make us dislike other people. We are better than them.
You are not where you should be as a person ,because you cannot make yourself that way. I am open, and let everything about me be seen, because that is what the journey was about. Trust nothing, but one. Take all the Security blankets away from me, and I still stay strong. When I go to do my final thing I will still have help. The one who overcame lost everything. He had nothing to hold onto. Remember his last words??? That was gone. It will be gone for me too, but I will have him.
Hard stuff to do. A lot to learn. You haven't done anything yet, and you haven't seen anything yet.
You hold onto though. You know why you hold on??? Because you are weak. You cannot overcome you. You've been given good information. Trust, strength, etc... you do not have.
I have come all this way to be not much help at all. I get it though. Our lives are kinda important to us in ways. We trust ourselves, and we can make things good?? There is always time?? Let me just do this one thing?? Me, me, me, huh??
A long ways to go folks, and the first step is a doozy huh?? Remember that Raiders of the Lost Ark film, where he had to take that step blindly?? Pretty apropos huh??
Oh well, I am done. Doing nothing today. :) Happy Weekend to all. ;)