Sunday, March 13, 2016

I Am Kinda A Screwball.

Hello, and good morning. How's it going??  Me, I am doing pretty good. I got a good night sleep last night, and that is how I like to start all my days.  Contemplating a cup of coffee, but I don't know. I don't even feel like it I don't think. The lucky thing about me. I wake up most mornings feeling like I have 6 cups of coffee in me already. I could give you the secret to my energy, but that is probably a bit too much crazy, even for you.

I did learn a lesson about my energy. It is one if the things I always counted on. Remember when I gave up a long time ago??  It was during heimleblog time, so not sure if anyone even read that. Anyway my energy was gone. I couldn't do it anymore, and my mind went to probably the lowest place one can go. I was mad.

Anyway I learned I am not special. I've been given things like this energy to make life okay I guess. My heart is generally upbeat. There really isn't a lot to me. Like I told a friend last night. Work, eat, sleep is basically my life. So, I am a screwball, and I realize some people are going through serious shit. Life threw like 8 curveballs, and things look a bit fucked up.

Yeah, I know.

The thing about life is typically people think they are good enough. You look around though, and there are no Saints. None are perfect, no matter what kind of screwy robe they may put on. People fall for that shit too, cuz people look on the outside. I asked for the mirror a long time ago, so you could look on the inside. That is the important stuff.

The mirror helps us find the truth. The truth is none of us are Saints. We are far from perfect. Is there a way to a better us. Yes there is. Isn't that worth everything??

For some maybe not, but that is the crossroad. The turn is that.

My stuff happened pretty quick. I was given the mirror at a time where I was very alone in the World. I decided I was going to make me the best person ever. It is what I wanted. School was done. I had a job, so what the heck.

As I kept going on, and on I kept looking inside me, and I was really not that great of a person. I thought of what I figured a good and decent person would do, and I saw a lot of flaws. Like the thief I saw my end clearly.

I apologized. I was scared, and I cannot be as good of a person as I want. It is out of my power.

So anyway two trials later, I am a different person. My path is to go all the way to the end. Follow the one who overcame to where he went.

It is what I wanted the most that awful scary Summer. I would have sacrificed everything to be perfect, and have that security. Funny thing though.  I had other stuff to do.

I was obedient all the way through. There were steps I had to make. I never told you I don't think, or maybe I did. One step made me be obedient for a bit so I would pray if I am destined for Hell, please let me accept it as that which I deserve. I didn't know it at the time, this was like 25 years ago, but I have to be like the thief. I've labored long, and you may think I deserve such and such, but I am going where I actually deserve. I am going so I can be made perfect. Exchange my current wine skin for a good one. That way I can be filled again.

Anyway. I know people got shit going on. Life is hard, and a lot of stuff sucks.

I am here, but I'll read your story. I know it isn't perfect, but you wish it was.

I guess I'll poop, and take the Hopester. I have to work in a few hours.

That is it for today!!!      :)

Thanks for reading!!!    :)

Hope Everyone has a Great and Awesome Day!!!    :)

xo's!!!    :)

Love You All!!!   :)

p.s. I gotta check the 10 day. Haven't in a few days.

Love You All xoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Ya'All are the best xoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Extras if these xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Extras of these xoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Luv ya's.  :)

MWAH.  :)))

xxoo.   :)

Now for really really cya cya cya     :D     :D

Laterzzzz Gaterzzzz.   :)

Aloha.  :)

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