What Was Troubling Me??

I figured it out.  Last year during my crowning achievement, the marathon,  (25 minute p.r.)  I was going through a hard time.  I deleted Heimleblog to never blog again.  Started up Steve'e Journey a few days later.  I even publicized it with great fear.  Remember I just wanted to be right, I have just struggled through some family stuff from Lisa and her side of the family.  God wanted me to be faithful.  Three people really helped me.  Beth, Lorraine, and Barb.  Beth and Lorraine gave me kind words when I was scared and I was down.  Barb out of nowhere added me as a FB friend.  Yeah I was kind of in awe of  Barb, Beth, and Becky too.  The running blogs girls.  :)

Lorraine, I stopped reading her blog after a while.  She was so honest, but like me didn't want to show people.  Now I know what her problem is.  Guilt.  She doesn't want to look at stuff, because there might be too much pain.  I get that.  Been there.  That shit is hard to look at.  Here is all I can say.  You will have help.  It will hurt.  You probably will cry, but you will have to look at it.  Lorraine, as you helped me, now I help you.  It won't kill you, but it won't be easy.

PHEW!!  I always knew God had plans for Lorraine, she lost her way, but I totally understand why.  Some of the crap we have to look at is hard.  I had to look at how much I hurt my girlfriend Katrina.  The day after I got drunk, cause I didn't want to look at that head on.  Heck no.  I feel for how hard this is going to be.  You'll be fine Lorraine in the end.

I don't really feel like blogging today.  We had a hard workout yesterday.  It wasn't the miles so much but the elements, as Alan said.  The heat wasn't overbearing, but the humidity was awful.  About 8.5 miles in I was supposed to marathon pace for  3 miles.  Ummm, not so much.  I was bonking after the first mile.  I didn't eat anything for breakfast, and had no gels.  :)   I woke up a bit late.  Ooops!!!

I want to hit 8:00's and I hit 9:00's.  I went fast early though due to running late.  I cruised to the High School, and cruised at the start.  Oh well.  It ended up being 14.7 @ 9:11 I think.  I hope that is our hardest day.  It was really brutal out there.

I really hope those who have guilt to get over, your journey runs smooth.  I know some stuff is hard to look at.  Dang!!  I really do feel for those who have that.

Good Luck!!  :)

Hope you All have a Great and Awesome Day!!  :)

xo's!!!   :)

Love You All!!!  :)