Sunday, May 15, 2011


I really don't have much today to be honest, but I will get some coffee, and get something down.  Hold on.  :)

It has been raining a lot, and I have been sleeping a lot this weekend.  That is o.k. though.  I guess I want to tell you a story.  Oscar is Beth's husband, and Beth was my first blogger I read.  It was a cold wintry morning, and I was watching the Sunday news stations.  I stumbled on the blogs.  There were 4 original ones, and you know I guess I didn't think much of it.  I read these blogs Barb, Beth, Audrey, and  Becky.  I read them for a long time, and I started heimleblog like the next day.  Heimbleblog was a lot like Becky's blog in I wrote almost every day.  That is her daily thing I guess.  That I blog every day "almost" is how I mention Becky every day.  Becky doesn't blog anymore btw.  The great thing about Becky is I always wanted to read bloggers when I woke up, and she always came through.  I commented a lot, and after awhile really every day. 

Who would have thought such a simple thing means so much.  Anyway I never got a comment on heimleblog, until it ended.  Everyone thought I was nuts, but I went and pr'ed a marathon.  3:47 I think.  A lot of hard work that year culminated in a highlight for me, although very down.  I deleted heimleblog, and was lost.  Now what??  I started the Journey with much fear.  OMG heimleblog ended not well.  So I started and kept going, and going, and going.  Some days dreading what I wrote.  Do people think I meant this instead of this??   Internal persecutions were high, but I woke up every morning strong.  Now you know how the Journey ended right??  I said o.k.  I will be the worst of the worst if that is your will.  That was my lot, and I guess if that is what is wanted I will do that.  Not happy about it, but right after I knew what I did was right.  My heart was happy, and I had won.  Obviously I had help.  Courage was granted me at the time I needed to do that thing.  Same as with the hospital stay.  I could save my life at the expense of the others.  At the time I needed the right answer it was given.  I said God's will be done.  In my mind my friends life was saved, and I was going to die a very unpleasant death in a very short amount of time.  I woke up the next day to my surprise, and cried when I saw Jim, Lora, Katrina, Darren, and Hal.  You know that story.  I started "The Wait" right after the Journey.  I was not afraid anymore, because I had the best help.  Now all you know I have the best in me, and the worst in me.  This is #3.  Why it has to be like this I don't know.  I was sleeping on the couch in Normal, Illinois, and I had a vision.  I hit the alligator (serpent) on the head 3 times, and Katrina and I can hug.  Meaning it is done.  I still have to do the final thing I have to do, and I assume it isn't going to be fun.  The one who overcame centuries ago though will be there to see me through.  No way I can do it on my own.  I foretold of this time when I wrote a letter to Barbara saying that hospital picture when Cathy had her latest baby was a great picture.  Not because she was at her best looking, or the best makeup.  Hell, I barely even remember the picture now.  I just remember there was a lot of emotion.  She was dealing with her sick kid.  Finances fucked because of that, etc...  The story goes this way to make all of us strong. 

Really while we look at stuff all we are doing is pulling away the layers of the charade the world puts on us.  Look at everything real.  Life is beautiful.  So many good things.  So many bad things.  Do you want to see the pain a zebra feels when a lion attacks??  Do you want to see the pain a mom feels when she puts her kid in the ground??  Do you want to watch the flowers bloom while you enjoy a glass of wine??  It is a shame too much of this world revolves around money, because that shit is well, an invention of man. 

This will be the 2nd time I view the results of a marathon from one Oscar Shutt.  The last time he cramped up, and you know what???  I was never so nervous for any other race, but that one.  It is important to Beth, and she would love to see Oscar break 3:00.  I would too.  I slept too late to get the automatic results though.  booooooooo.  Oh well.  I'll know sometime today. 

Gooooo Oscar!!!

That is it for today!!!   :)

Thanks for reading!!!   :)

Hope Everyone has a Great and Awesome Day!!!   :)

xo's!!!   :)

Love You All!!!   :)

p.s.  hmmmm not really sure if I have one.  how's that??   :)

Love You All  xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Ya'All are the best  xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

extras of these  xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Extras of these xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Extras for Olga and Nancy  xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxxoxoxoxo

Extras for Christi  xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Extras for the rest of you toooooooooooooooooo   xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Extras for Beverley Smith @bunky1110 too.  One of the xxxx people.   xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxooxoxo

Now for really really cya cya cya  :D   :D 

1 comment:

Carol said...

Have a great day keep blogging no matter what ppl think of u. what u think of yourself is all that matters.