My life?? What do you make of it?? It sure isn't exciting by any stretch. I fill up my life with as much stupid crap as everyone else. :) Hold on, I have to go let Jazz out. BRB...
Okay, I am back. So what is going on with me?? Nothing at all. Life as we know it. I have to bike in a bit, and do a load of laundry.
What is the story of this blog here?? It runs in place. month after month after month. This blog is called the wait, and I bet your life can be called the wait huh?? Waiting for answers. Waiting for meaning. I sometimes lately look at the totality of this blog and think.... ummm, I can use a little help here.
My whole life is the Wait though huh?? My hard times after Graduating College to what am I here for?? This World looked very ugly, and this life... THIS LIFE, what can I make of it?? So I go through my things, and come out the other side. Waiting for my meaning. What am I to do with my life. Then it came like that. Like a thief in the night really. Suffer for 6 days, and finally get to a place where I am good, and confident, and OMG... I mean OMG, I am one of the best people in the World. Only to have it all taken away, and me led on a solo journey. More suffering, and a bad Summer of learning, and really more waiting to be honest.
I found the answers I was looking for, and actually they were just given me. Everything moved quick back then, and that is how real the SHIT is. The hidden things in this World move quick. They are VERY serious, and it is things you don't know about.
You can be given a quick glimpse of your life. It is a sword kinda, and it shows you the wrongs you have done people. How you hurt them. I saw some of the crappy things I did to people while growing up. I suffered from wanting to be more humble than I felt I was.
There is a person I wanted to be, and the person who I really was. Maybe we all are in the same boat??
I am here now though. I guess the best you can say about me is I am accepted. My life has purpose. I have come to terms with the wrongs I have done, and the wrongs done to me. Maybe that is what everyone is really afraid to look at. Our life.
You are getting older. Life is going on, and is this it?? Is this as exciting as it gets?? You know me a bit now. I feel life can be busy, but
Even Van Gogh currently doesn't give a crap about any of his paintings. Thomas Jefferson isn't thinking about the slave girls he had relations with.
Life is a Journey from birth to death. Something we don't escape, and something everyone else has done. I found a way to put a little crack in the space/time continuum. I broke the line, and it is all done with a turn.
My whole life was all about overcoming what I want. Overcome me me me, and accept your will. I am different, and I have been through a lot, and there is no way I could ever ever ever have done what I have done without help.
It seems the first step was all me though. I want I want I want, but I overcame my heart and said "ButYour Will".
The rest I could not have done on my own. I needed help. I have seen things, and suffered things, and yet in my heart is the desire to help. Like I said though I am running in place with this thing, so once again I ask for some help. I am not the author of this story, and I am not the author of this life. I ask.
I know too a lot of times the help we ask for comes in the form of blessing in disguise type stuff. So brace yourself. Be strong, because I surely don't know what will happen, but a lot of learning comes through difficult times, and stuff.
So here is to you. :) I gotsta ride my bike now.
Have a fab one all. :) xoxoxoxo, and xxxxxxxxxxx, I forgot those yesterday. :)