Saturday, June 9, 2012

I Get Easily Irritated I Think...

I think I get easily irritated, and I am not sure why.  Maybe it is because I let people see all of me, or as much as possible...  Maybe that is it.  I am a bit wild, and a bit free. and without a ton of stress.  I am not a big fan of rules.  You know one of the things that pisses people off is "HAVE TO"  You have to do this, or that or that.  That being said there are some things people have to do.  In order to be as confident, and happy etc.. you have to be active.  A video gamer, or do nothinger will never be happy.  A person who does nothing in his/her free time will just be a jaded, and depressed person. 

I'll give you a little learning thing I had a long time ago.  This was maybe my last year of College.  I went a little longer than most of my friends.   ;)   I was living in my Dad's house he rented out to College kids, and all of a sudden all my close friends were gone.  Living in Chicago, or elsewhere.  I was living with basically strangers.  At this time I was a slob.  One of the new dudes told me this house is a mess, and he wasn't going to pay rent in this messy house.  I was like o.k.  I never felt so alone.  I am living with strangers, and this dude is making rules???  So I sulked at my loneliness for a bit, and cleaned the kitchen etc...  I mean it was spotless.  A spark was lit.  It gave me confidence, and I felt good I did that, and it gave me a sense of accomplishment.  From then on, I cleaned the place every day.  Dishes, vacuuming, cleaned the bathroom etc.. 

I guess there is where my work ethic was born.  I then finished up school, etc... always kept that work ethic, although I don't clean as much as I used to.  At that stage of the game I had no idea what my life would look like, but things happened pretty quickly after that.  I graduated college, and you know the rest.  Well some of you do...

I am a certain way, and this is me.  I do not listen to rules of I should be this way or that way, because I am an open and free spirit, and if you got shit to hide, that is your issue.  Funny how our natural tendency is to hide shit.  We don't want people to see us, although the path to happiness is allowing people to see us, but it is hard, because to let people see you you have to let your guard down, and actually be vulnerable.  It is in our weakness where we show strength, and you know what, it ain't fucking easy.  I think we want to always feel strong.  Like we are with it etc... and none of us always feel that way.  If we expose our vulnerable side it brings confidence, and healing etc...  If we hide our vulnerable side it brings anger, and other bull shit like that.  For us to be better we have to accept we really are not that strong.  It is part of our truth that goes against our natural tendency.  We have to show people we are not strong, when we "think" we really want everyone to think we are. 

some days this last part flows, and sometimes not. 

That is it for today!!!   :)

Thanks for reading!!!   :)

Hope Everyone has a Great and Awesome Day!!!   :)

xo's!!!    :)

Love You All!!!   :)

p.s.  time to get me some coffee.  :)

Love You All  xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Ya'All are the best xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Extras of these  xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Extras of these  xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Now for really really cya cya cya   :D   :D 

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