Monday, February 14, 2011

Bringing The Heavy Guns

You guys really keep me grounded.  I had so much I wanted to say, and I can tone it down a bit.  Not mean angry stuff, no way, but just really stuff about me, and my Journey.  I see we are on different pages in a way, and it is no big deal. 

So let's begin.  The night of being admitted in the hospital.  I was delivered up to the judges.  Remember it says don't worry when you are delivered up to the judges you will be given what you need to say in the time you need it or something like that.  Like I said, it has been a long while.  I think I may have said this before, but maybe not.  Now realize this is all hidden.  I am fighting for my life and my salvation. Told to do some really ridiculous things.  I was walking out of work naked.  Yeah loony loony loony.  Told to do this told to do that.  Khien I think drove me to the hospital, not sure.  My brother Jim saw my eyes, as they chained me to the bed.  He saw my Mom's death eyes in me.  I asked Jim, can they take these chains off???  I was going to die, and I was going to hell.  That night, probably within an hour.  In my mind it said I could save myself, but it would be at the expense of my friends.  Jim, Hal, Darren, Katrina, and Lora.  What did I say???   God's will be done.  Judged dead!!!!   I was going to die, and I was going to hell, but my friends were going to be saved.  I just wanted the death to be quick, because I knew it was going to be unpleasant.  Surprise Surprise I wake up the next morning.  My brother Jim, had a dream that night saying there were religious things going on.  I had a vision at home a little later.  You know this may or may have been after the Physical Depression of hitting the Alligator 3 times on the head, and then Katrina and I can hug.  Hospital was #1.

End of the Journey was #2.  I was at work, and Once again I was delivered up to the judges.  I had to be the anti-Christ, which also was who it said I was during my 6 days of persecution way before the hospital.  How could I save myself.  I am the worst of the worst.  A Judas if you will.  Once again courage found it's way into my heart, and I said God's will be done!!   Judged to be the worst of the worst.  My heart was glad, and I thought it was because Satan won, but right away I knew I did good.  There were other days of suffering too.  Remember I deleted Heimleblog, I had a day where I was in a sword fight with ones who had Hatori Hanso swords, and I had a utility knife???  Judged judged judged, bad bad bad.  Persecuted a lot.  Blessed are those who have been persecuted for the sake of righteousness.  All hidden.  Not to be seen. 

Remember Thanksgiving I won the race??  Remember me tweeting about it.  It was a 5K race huh???  Stay calm cool and collected, and once you hit mile 2 then you incrementally add speed.  Kick it once you know the end is there.  You cannot hang on to a 5K, it is toooooooo long.  You can be below pace at the 2 mile marker, because the last 1.1 is going to be fast.  Anyway I knew I was 2/3 of the way done.  I tweeted about it from Beau and Charity's deck.  I am sure Beth saw it.  I wonder if she knew what it meant??  I was also exchanging e-mails at the same time.  That led to a rocky road, but it made the connection stronger. 

So I know this is a hard blog to read, and stuff.  I assume it is scary.  What seems hard hard hard for us is eassssssyyyyyyyyyyy for the one who does the work.  :)   We don't do the work.  You see he wants to show us what he can do, and he will. 

Yesterday a run.  I was going to go 6 miles, but I knew running down the street I was going to go on my 4 mile loop.  My legs didn't feel all that great, and Once I hit the 3 mile turn off, that is what I did.  3.13 miles @ a little over 9:00 pace.  Biking to work today, and swimming.  Like I put on Maija's blog if I am not training, I am doing nothing worthwhile.  :)

Wanna know why I was never worried about Beth and my relationship????  Cause I knew a long time ago, that she was my friend who would stick closer than a brother.  Never worried about it.  That is why my FB decrease happened.  I was doing all this stuff writing, and no one on FB paid attention.  I feel this is important what I do, and no one cared.  I didn't know it was a hard thing to acknowledge reading this.  I am not worried about relationships, because I brought Kyle and Nikki VandenHeuvel back, because I missed Nikki a ton.  My heart was pulled that way.  Yes platonic you morons.   :)   lol.  My journey has also made my relationship with Jenny Parker Harrison really strong.  Wanna know why???  Because I love her.  Wanna know what the greatest gift is????   It is why I do this so often.  :)

That is it for today!!!   :)

Thanks for reading!!!   :)

Hope Everyone has a Great and Awesome Day!!!   :)

xo's!!!   :)

Love You All!!!   :)

p.s.  Renee Mance had a baby Chloe a while ago, and she got her first run in.  15 minuter.  She is the wife of Doug Mance a.k.a Rob Roy, our former Millwork manager.  Also Stephanie Mae my cousing is training for the dam to dam race.  I think it is close to a half marathon.  Got her first run of the year in.  Woo Hoo!!  Melanie is like me now.  She likes to train, and have some drinks.  Hal is like that too.  We like to have our fun.  Woo Hoo!!!  :)

Love You All xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

You all are the best.  xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Like to throw extra of these for my Welsh friends xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Now for really really cya  cya cya!!!!   :)

Ha ha!!  I almost forgot.  I know what tie Oscar is going to wear today!!!   :)   hee hee!!!   cya all!!!   :)

Oh wanna throw some more love Doreen, Gina, and Jules way toooooooo.   MWAH!!!   MWAH!!!   :))

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Wow!! The stuff I don't know about you Steve! How far back to I have to go?
You're a sweet soul and I love that we're "more" friends!
Happy Valentines days!