Monday, August 22, 2011

My Best Charity Was The Turn!!

Now you know my story, those of you who read this.  Well, I am going to send Doreen some flowers for her birthday??  Know why??  When I was down one day, she stepped up, and offered support.  Who I was, and who I am was important enough for her to say Steve I read.  How far does that go?  A million miles huh??  You know that isn't the easiest thing to do. 

I try to do that to others.  I get a feel for how they feel, by how they write.  Feeling sad, and bad, and stuff like that I try and step in. 

So here are my pictures for Doreen on her Birthday.  My little way to say she is important, and wonna da best.   :)   Took them specially for her yesterday.  :)

I had more pictures, but it takes a while to upload them.  I don't know how people can put so many pictures on their blog.  SHEESH!!  :)

with Love to Doreen.  :)  That is a pretty select group of people who got flowers on my blog.  :)  It ain't much, and ya can't take it to the bank, but you can put it in your heart.  :)

I know we look for meaning in our life.  We want it to be everything, and I know you wanna do good, and be good, but what can one do right??  As your vision becomes clearer and clearer ya realize not a lot out there is there?  I told you after college I was searching.  Remember I almost cheated on Katrina with the pretty blond.  Umm she was fricken hot btw.  I didn't care, I was drinking etc... but to see how much I hurt her.  Holy crap.  This is NOT who I want to be.  My step-mom dies, and my Grandpa dies, and I look at all the available jobs to do.  The world looked like a pile of dung to me to be honest.  Everything seemed stupid, and I made the turn.  I didn't offer anything except my life.  Can I do anything??  I waited and waited, and was led on this journey.  A journey of tears, and suffering, etc...  I endured all with help, cuz he said he would save me from everything.  Remember when I suffered more than anyone ever I knew.  To the point where like Job I prayed make it so I was never born.  Then he lifted me up, and I was full in spirit.  I trusted the fullness of it, and I could do no wrong.  He didn't want me to trust in that though, and he made me very poor in spirit, and I have been like that since.  He also told me I was worst of the worst.  I thought huh??  How?? why???  I was angry, and told to do some things.  Want to know how it happened??

I was going to be disobedient.  I'll show you.  One time I was getting grounded, and my step mom told me to count the number of items on the floor, and that is how many days you will be grounded.  So I counted more than the amount of items that were on the floor, to show her.  Yeah, I am dumb.  :)  On this day outside Bromenn Healthcare by the garbage room, I said well, that was pretty dumb.   I said I might as well be smart about it, even though I am unhappy.  I did what he asked, and I knew I did right right away.  Then I was led on the journey to the hospital, and than the physical depression, and then the wait of however many years it took for this to start up with Heimleblog, and The Journey.  Now my blog is "The Wait" and I wait to do one final thing.  I have a pretty good idea of when it is going to be too. 

That is it for today!!!   :)

Thanks for reading!!!   :)

Hope Everyone has  a Great and Awesome Day!!!   :)

xo's!!!   :)

Love You All!!!   :)

p.s.  as you know trust is the quid pro quo, and that started with Olga.  Olga and Nancy both stepped in last summer, and offered support, and Gina did too, and Kim Sheridan, and Jen Gray, and even Theresa Nelson.  Ya see now we are racing the race of life, and that is how I help.  Well not me exactly, but my help does that.  Remember yin and yang though.  There is an opposing voice who will make it easy for me to think the worst.  A voice of one who does nothing, but lie.  Shoot straight with me and all will go well.  Ya don't shoot straight it will make the path harder.  I will suffer, and you probably will too. 

Love You All xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Ya'All are the best  xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Extras of these  xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Extras of these  xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Extras for Doreen xoxoxoxoxoxxoxoxoxoxo

Extras for Doreen, Jules, and Brandy  *the girl*  xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Pretty heavy one huh?? 

Extras for Beth Rose Mickel, because  she is strong.  She is honest, and I dig that.  xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Now for really really cya cya cya  :D   :D 

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