I am pretty sure I have nothing to write about, but we'll see. I am going to get some coffee, so hold on. I will brb. :)
Oops, coffee maching was unplugged, it is getting ready now. I can give you some crazy stuff. A lot of times when I write stuff, I have absolutely no idea what it means. Not a clue, although I guess it can mean different things to different people.
I got a little taste of what some of the points of my life meant. Remember when after the hospital I went through that physical depression thing?? Just an energy drainer, and man did that suck. You have no idea how I hated life during that, but you know Natalie got me hitting the exercise bike etc..., and at least helping out in that way. Then the energy returned. I knew the exact moment, and I lived a life of Jospeh Heller for a while. Just a nut, going crazy. I was out of jail type of thing, and man I was going to have fun with life. I knew I had some stuff to do in my life, and it would happen. I didn't know when or how or anything. Who would have thought it would be this, and my life here and now, and Heimleblog, Journey, The Wait??
Anyway on that summer day during Heimleblog when just like that I was taken down. Low Low Low. I hit my breaking point. I cannot do that again. I cursed, and said WHY?? Why do I have to live this fucking life. What a piece of shit. So there I am with not a hope in the world. Not wanting a hope, and yuck. You see there was nothing I did to help myself. I could not have done a thing. That is a hard lesson too. We want to think we are good, because we do this, and we do that, but really there is only one good, and we don't even really know what that means.
I think I know what my posts the last few weeks have been doing. They have been pulling hard at you I bet, and you all probably have thoughts and stuff about your life. I guess we are making the turn, and I didn't know it was hard.
That is trust though. Trust in what you think you want or trust in the one with the best vision. This is your journey and your battle. Just think too, after I made the turn, I suffered. I suffered for knowledge and wisdom I guess, and figured out that just because I made the turn, it still didn't mean I did anything good.
In my heart was belief in the future days coming, which started out with Heimleblog. Even when I lost hope, and my heart was dead, he took it, and keeps me going so to speak.
Coffee is done. :)
That is it for today!!! :)
Thanks for reading!!! :)
Hope Everyone has a Great and Awesome Day!!! :)
Love You All!!! :)
p.s. oh. o.k. :) thought you didn't like me anymore. :) xoxo Good Luck!! :)
Love You All xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo
Ya'All are the best xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo
Extras of these xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Extras of these xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo
Now for really really cya cya cya :D :D
Oh, Jerry and I ran the 6 miler last night. It was warm out, and a lot of people out and about. There may have been some cute girls too. ;)