Wednesday, December 21, 2016

A Little Luck.

So, I biked to work and back yesterday. The temps were going to warm up finally. Hit 30°+ probably,  so I thought it might be a nice ride home. I didn't count on the  1000 MPH winds, and the drifting on the sidewalks. The ride home was not easy.

I was hoping I'd get a text cancelling the run. I could easily have blown it off. It never came,  so I relaxed/napped for an hour. I was running late, cuz I had to get gas in the truck.

Anyway, I made it to the run. I was in the store looking for the short plumber, and I didn't see him. I was basically at a run with a bunch of people I didn't know. They were just waiting. Some were going to run a route, and others the snow melt. I just took off.

I had a route I thought of last week, and I ran it. It wasn't a particularly fast run, but it was the distance I predicted it would be. Normally I would have run a loop on the snow melt to get the total distance I wanted, but I was glad I got the run in. I didn't want to on my way home from work,  so that's a win.

Other than that not much going on. Being in the wilderness is pretty trippy from where I stand. You can list out all the things you can possibly see,  and pretty much check off {doesn't matter} on everything.

I work,  eat, sleep for zero points. Just living my life before me. People want to sometimes show significant things in their life, but they aren't. We just spend a little time above ground. Carving out our little lives. We do this imperfectly. Many have an idea of what a good and decent person does,  so they try to do that.

Check it all off. It doesn't matter. Your deeds do nothing. I don't know if you can see it or accept it.

Your hearts betray you,  cuz they aren't perfect. The timeline of your life isn't perfect. Every turn you made took you down another path of imperfection.

The question you must ask is does it matter?   My answer to you is yes it does. Does it matter you are not the best a person can be? 

Yes that does matter. Your truth falls well short of the absolute truth. That too is a danger.

On your perceived road to Sainthood, you ended up somewhere way different. Now you find yourself in the wilderness, and trapped.

There is nothing of value in the wilderness, and you just run in place.

You are here in your life,  and in the end we don't even matter.

Now I've been through the wilderness. With the full force of condemnation laying over my head. I knew I was there though. I knew what was at stake.

If I tried thinking of some redeeming quality I might have had, it didn't make me feel better.

I just carried my truth. As far as creatures go, I am as ridiculous as the beasts in the field. Alive for no real reason really.

I ended up with a purpose,  but I still am nothing significant. Just a vessel being used. Being used while being imperfect,  cuz it has to be this way. Faithful with unrighteous mammon and all, so I can eventually get the good stuff.

Anyways. I guess that's good.

I may go for a short run since I got time.

Laterzzzzzz.    :)

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