A Million Avenues to Choose. Which Direction Today??

Boy I looked outside my mind's eye, and realized today I can go in any of a million directions.  I will start off with how my day started yesterday.  On Tuesday I napped before the run for two hours.  So I did not sleep too well.  I was tired, so all I did yesterday was bike to work.  Lisa and I left the same time, so I drove home with her, and will run to work today.  On my Wednesdays now I would come home and nap before speed work if tired, but I don't have speed work til next week, so I came home and drank.  I just had fun.  I listened to music, putzed around on line, and really just had fun. 


I realize how free I am.  Last year I tried to do so many things, and failed.  This year, I am going to let the year come to me.  I am just going to ride this little train called life, and see where it takes me.  I am pretty lucky to have such a great schedule.  I work early, and now my training season starts, so I run on Tuesday and Wednesdays.  Saturday mornings too,  and Sundays, and maybe pick up some miles here and there.  That really is neither here nor there though, I am just happy.  I have a great life, and all with how I feel inside. 

I think I will get a little weird here.  Now I have said many things in the past, and I am sure some people still read me from a while back.  Remember a couple summers ago where I gave up??  Life broke me.  I told God I give up.  I cursed him for ever making me live to see such days.  I cannot do it anymore.  That night he took my heart.  It was a vision/dream thing.  You wonder how that is??  It always is done in cartoon fashion.  I think maybe, because that is all we can handle, but that isn't the reason.  I have been through some non-cartoon fashion things before.  My 6 days of suffering the worst persecutions was all real.  100%  real life I am doomed, am bad, I am evil, and I am going to hell type shit.  pounded in my head every second of the day.  Mind you I did not sleep much those 6 days, and I did not eat much either.  Remember the ending??  When I saw a real life angel, and I knew it??  A homeless guy walked up to me and asked me if I had a buck.  I looked in my wallet, and had a single, and a twenty.  I gave him the $20.  I had goose bumps, and cried after he left, because just right then and there came the verse, "be kind unto strangers, because many have entertained angels unawares"  I knew with 100% certainty.  I still felt I was bad, and evil though.  I was lifted.  Everywhere I looked there were birds in the tops of the trees, which made me remember that verse. 

Speaking of Bible thumpers.  Those who deem abortion to be the #1 "Christian" topic.  Ummmm abortion is mentioned twice in the Bible.  Both times in the old testament, and both times it says better off are those who would have been aborted than to see the evil that is done under the sun.  (Solomon)  Or Job's prayer to be aborted would have been better than his life.  Remember the verse Woe to those who teach as doctrine the precepts of men.  None of you know shit, so shut the fuck up about that stuff.  Your whole religion is based on one guy who lived a shitty life, and he had followers who never married, and never had kids.  Leave the fucking sword alone, you play with shit you know nothing about.  Your whole fucking salvation is based on believing something the Devil himself believes.  That won't get him or you anywhere.   Meaning you waste your fucking time.  Your eyes have not been opened yet to see the sword for how it really is, and I haven't been through all the things I need to do to understand it.  At some point in time the sword I will be able to use for good, but for now it just slashes like a shitty sword.  When I go through my final thing, I will have a nice sharp Hatori Hanso sharp sword so to speak.  I am not there yet. 

Like I said there is not one thing you can do 100% of the time to make yourself a better person, or we'd all fucking do it.  What we are doing takes time.  This shit is not going to be done overnight.  It is living.  Doing our hobbies whatever they may be.  It is failing at shit every single day, because we all do.  It is getting a cleaner, better look at life.  It is being real, and honest, and that is the stuff you have control of.  You want to tell people your secrets??  No you don't do you.  So a lot of stuff is personal to you, and you deal with that in your own way.  You can be real, and you can be honest, you have control over that.  What you don't have control over is the mirror.  That was given you as a gift.  It is a good mirror.  Trust it.  Trust what you see.  Don't worry if you don't look pretty in your mind's eye all the time, because a butterfly once was not too pretty.  Be courageous and be strong, because we all are being led in a good way, and we have some great fucking people with us too.  So don't ruin shit by speaking shit you know nothing about.  :)  All you really know is you.  You are the only one walking in your shoes, and you are not walking in anyone else's. 

Truth of the matter is we all are pretty fucking great, and we all pretty much fucking suck too.  :) 

That is it for today!!!   :)

Thanks for reading!!!   :)

Hope Everyone has a Great and Awesome Day!!!   :)

xo's!!!   :)

Love You All!!!   :)

p.s.  The race of life takes endurance.  It isn't a 100 yard dash.  Keep the eyes open fuckers.  :)

Love You All xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Ya'All are the best xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Extras of these  xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Extras of these  xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

I accept you all, because you are not perfect.  Those who try and show and pretend perfect are ugly, our beauty is shown by our flaws.  It makes us all different.  We were born different, and we walked a unique path too no one else has walked, and that makes us even more different too.  Ya dig?? 

Now for really really cya cya cya  :D   :D