Hello, and good morning all How's it going?? Me, I am doing pretty good. I got a lot of sleep last night, I don't have to work til late. I'll take the Hopester for a little run in a bit, so what is one to complain about??
Well, I do have a blog, and have had one for a number of years. Geesh, I don't even know why I started one in the first place. I think I did that Sunday after spending a whole day reading the running blogs. Having no idea where that was headed, I blogged almost every day. I had no idea if anyone read it, and some must have, because I would wake up every day to blog. I would write whatever, and it probably wasn't a horrible blog.
If I could tell you now why I did heimleblog I couldn't tell you. It ended horribly, and with a deletion, and also with a Marathon PR, if I remember correctly. I remember seeing a little bit of people's lives that summer. Friends coming over, and telling of their lives in the younger years. Anyway I deleted that blog, because I was being judged. That blog did get weird, and I was a bit of a different person back then. Every day would get bad at times during the day. The sad music at work would damn near kill me. I mourned a death twice that Summer, and I was pretty sure that damn near could have killed me. I saw glimpses of the inside of everyone's soul at one time. What all the people felt deep down.
It isn't what you think either. It isn't this fire to accomplish goals, and all the other superficial crap you think your worth is tied up in. Inside everyone's soul is a thief on the cross. Once you get to the point where you view your life like the thief on the cross did there is nothing but sadness in you.
The World hides all that from you, because the World is full of Disney cartoons, and coloring books, and all the other crap this fake and horrible World is made up of.
So how do you get to the point where you stop depending on all the unreal bullshit in the World, and start seeing the truth of life, and more importantly the truth of YOU, and your life??
If only someone would have given up their coin long ago to follow a different path. If only they would follow a path of suffering, but also a path of learning, and was willing to take time out of his day to point you in the right direction?? Wouldn't that make things so much easier??
Well, no I guess it doesn't. I didn't know everyone was Saints already. I didn't know they did no wrong. I didn't know more interesting, and fulfilling to them was a path of zero points, and superficial goals, and the truth of life is the last thing you want to see.
I didn't know you want to hide in your protected small World. Hide in your shell, because to show our less than perfect self is the last thing you want to do.
I've invested years in this stupid thing here, and it hasn't done a damn thing. Isn't that crazy??
The best part of all though is I still get to wake up like this every morning. What you do does not affect me, but I bet if I stopped doing this it would affect you.
Is that confidence, arrogance, or being assured.
Well, if one were to take a look at the previous years, from the end of the journey on I would say confidence and being assured.
Why?? I gave up my coin. My path led me to spots where I had the strength to say "Your will be done". Even if it was to my own detriment. A strength given me, that you can never in a million years no matter what you do, come up with on your own.
That is why your lives are lived in quiet desperation. It is because they mean nothing, and you know as well as I do, everyone at some point can be put on a pedestal, but there is only one way to go from there.
Pedestals aren't real. My path only leads to the real, and the truth, and that my friends I cannot take credit for. I gave up my one coin, and that was for a better coin. I have been given a lot, although on the outside it probably looks like nothing.
That is how I am winning.
That is how it is good to be me. :)
Laterzzzzzzzzzzz all. xoxoxoxo xxxxx
LOL. Have a good one. :)