A Cheat Day.

So the cravings got to me yesterday. I was busy. I took Hope for a long walk, and I did my Sunday routine of chores. Made a new meal for the crock pot,  and I was out of things to do. The cravings were bad, so I thought I'd mitigate them by having a cheat day. I can't say they totally scratched that itch meaning it didn't miraculously cure those cravings like I thought. I thought it would be a magic euphoric cure, which it wasn't. My body was sending me false signals.  You will not only get rid of  those cravings, but the euphoria after will be unbelievable.  The cravings I guess I didn't have anymore. The great euphoria not so much. 

Me drinking yesterday was not so much impulse as more get rid of those cravings. Honestly if I drank one day/week I'd be fine with it. I start another week today. No drinks or AA meetings. As I feel now it seems simple. I have no desire to drink. It doesn't mean the cravings won't start after work though. As I feel now I don't think they'll be bad if I get them. I have too much to do, and I feel my drinks last night purged the demons. 

Also last night I didn't drink more,  cuz I took a week off. I do not have a headache, and I am not hungover. If I drink again,  it won't be til next weekend. 

Yesterday was disappointing in steps. I did all my stuff, and just cracked 12,000 steps by 1:00PM. During the week I am somehow at 20,000 steps typically by 1:00PM.  100 miles seems almost impossible. It will be very hard for Sunday to be a big step day. I'll need like 94 miles now to get 100. That seems impossible. Especially since I am typically tired by the end of the day. 

On a side note, the scale says I lost 3 lbs. last week. Even though I felt I ate a ton as the week went on. Too many variables to read much into it, but I'll make a note of it. 

I have one week of Christmas left plus a couple days. Work days will be shorter on average after Christmas. Now I have to find something to fill my time. My drinking yesterday has dulled my dreams of all the magical things I'll do with my time. Another price of alcohol. One I guess I was learning while quitting. One that has turned into fact, after I had drinks last night. The things you learn. 

Anyway today is a workout day. I am looking forward to it, because I think working out gets rid of fat more than cardio.  Cardio people don't really get muscle tone in my opinion or rather in my observations.  My knee didn't hurt much this morning when I climbed the steps to bring laundry up, so I'll be able to run soon. 

Anyway today is a day. I am kinda excited I don't have to worry about alcohol today. It's not in my plans, so it gives me some freedom. It's not on the timescale of activities that will be done today, so I have extra time. 

As to drinking, I am not sure if I want the one day per week or not. It's no biggie really,  cuz one day/week = big deal. It's how I originally lost 47 lbs. Along with an hour on the exercise bike 6 days/week. I don't know how many steps I used to walk on those days. That must have been before I started riding my bike to work too. That's a long time ago. Like 2004 or 5. I was still a manager at the old Menards building. I didn't step down yet,  but close. 

Anyway I spose.  I'll let you know how today goes with cravings and whatnot. The weekdays are busy,  so I don't think the cravings have time to sneak in. As of right now I have no interest anyway. Too much to do. Too much of life to experience. No need to dull it down you know?  I'm at the stage too where alcohol does nothing for me. I learned yesterday it doesn't create a magical euphoria. One has to get in touch with their cravings to learn it. It just wasn't that great. 

Of course smokers with lung cancer probably think the same thing as they take a drag on the thing that's slowly  killed them. 

Addiction is a brutal thing. The things we learn.  

Anyhoo, gotta run... ermmmm. I mean walk. 

Laterzzzzzzzz.        :)

xoxo.         :)

xxoo.         :)

Byeeeeeeeee.         :)))