Good morning. How's it going? Me, I am fine. I slept over 9 hours last night. Typically only 1-2 days per week I'll get over 8, so that was a lot of sleep. Yesterday was pretty normal. I worked like 8-1/2 hours or so. I didn't see a movie, cuz I had to pick up an impact driver for my air compressor. I have a job to do on my truck, and that is the easiest way to take off these two bolts. Just adding a step thingy to get into the bed of the truck easier.
I finished listening to another book, and got another from the same author. They are good stories. She reminds me of Gillian Flynn. Those type, maybe not quite as dark.
Today is Sunday so I have my normal routine before work. Get shit done so I don't have to do anything on Monday. I like working Sundays. We are busy, we do a lot, but there isn't a ton of pressure. I guess there isn't a ton of pressure at any time I work. Just do your job. You may have to work a little extra or leave a little early. No biggie, just do your job. Is there any pressure in any job? Besides being a surgeon or something.
I don't find life to be very stressful at all actually. I enjoy life better when I am busy. When I have stuff to do. Too much down time seems like a waste to me. It's not good for me. What in life is there to worry about? Eventually we'll die, so health scares are real. There are questions of what one is to do with their lives, and I have my answer already. No second guesses, no looking over my shoulder. I am confident, secure, and all those things.
I know the true nature of me. I know why I am the way I am now. I know why I wasn't perfect before, and why it is out of my power now. I am not angry. If anyone has wronged me, it don't matter. Not one person in this World has any say in who I am. You are zero% of the equation that is me. I owe no one anything. No one owes me anything either. If I do any good it isn't because of some noble thing about me. I am just a vessel being used in this story.
I guess it took a lot for me to realize how powerless I was to make me the person I wanted. I learned decades ago what must be done. The final thing I must do. I was willing, and wanted that more than anything. I survived the wilderness. Scared every second of every day. So I wanted security.
I have that now. I was in the Spiritual wilderness too. My fear was inside. I was through the eye of the needle already, so I knew of the bad and scary spiritual stuff out there. I've already endured 6 days of being persecuted by the worst of the worst. He was inside me. Not possessed as those things go, but he had control to judge me, and tell me I was evil.
You haven't experienced these things, and you don't know about this type of stuff. Those 6 days weren't even one of the 3 times I must overcome. That is why I didn't know my number. Those 6 days were as bad as any I've ever had, but it wasn't one of the 3.
I am a vessel asked to do something I couldn't do on my own.
It seems to me we went into the earthly wilderness with you. So you can see the World as it is, cuz you still have to overcome you. One has to be broken kinda to do that. To see the sad state of our existence. We ain't doing anything special here.
Anyway, I spose.
Til next time.
xoxo. :)
xxoo. :)
Laterzzz. :)
Byeee. :)))
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