I've Been Blah...

Good Morning all.  How's it going??  Me,  I am doing okay I guess.  Today is a run day.  I am up early, and I can run some miles before the miles, and run some hills etc...  I haven't blogged in a while, and been pretty quiet in other areas too. 

Why???   Every time I think of something it seems stupid to me, and boring, and why bother??  Actually I think much of life is boring, and I really am only really really interested in getting to know people, and people are afraid of that.  To get to know someone they actually have to throw themselves out there.  It is in that area where people will judge.  Society will judge, and we will just feel miserable about stuff. 

I mean in many aspects of our life if people knew us we'd think they would hate us.  We suck pretty bad, and that Shit is scary.  We are all flawed.  We all judge, and we hate some people, and like the people who are most like us. 

I have a ton of ugly and bad news inside me.  Bad stuff about the World, and life, and all kindsa things like that.  I hate sharing it, because Goddammit if everyone isn't trying to burnish their own lives... at least what we show. 

Our lives we feel we must show our best foot.  Put on our best suit, or best dress in public.  We'd never show ourselves in our ugly self, because it is not really accepted.  We try to show ourselves to be special in some way, but we aren't.  There is no redeeming quality in us that makes us better than others.  Nothing that says we are unique 'here' so that makes me better than most??  

Life is full of ugly stuff.  We are full of ugly stuff.  Life has a lot of ugly crap that just needs to be accepted.  A flawed World made up of a bunch of flawed Societies, and us trying to make our way in this flawed World.   Everywhere you look there is pressure to show our good side.  Our life is good, because yadda, yadda, yadda.

I have said this a ton of times, but there is a lot to do.  Not much if anything has actually been done.  We plan for the future as if we can control the majority of variables.  We really can't.   A lot of the dangers out there are invisible.  Who plans a train wreck, or an airplane crash, car wreck etc...  Most of the planned deaths are done by the people in power wherever from.  Most countries are guilty.  All Countries place an honor on their own people they send out to kill.  Some do it for God as if he needs the help.

Anyway life is frustrating at times.  Especially with what I have to do, and how it goes.  We all are messed up in ways, because we are pulled in all kindsa directions.   I should be like this, or I should show this.  Life is a big ole jumbled mess, and who can makes sense of it??

I am writing this, and I do this to help.  You all have a ton of tough crap to do, and it is going to be hard, and what you understand now to be important may not be in the long run.  Actually I can guarantee you it isn't.

There will be a victory here somehow someway, and it sure isn't because of me.   I am a vessel used to help along the way, but I am worthless, and weak, and able to do very little.  Kinda crazy little ole me can be used huh??  Even when I really am nothing.   I think so too.

That is it for today!!!    :)

Thanks for reading!!!    :)

Hope Everyone has a Great and Awesome Day!!!    :)

xo's!!!    :)

Love You All!!!     :)))

p.s.   There is nothing easy to be done here going forward.  If you have a good day take it, but expect a lot bad ones probably.  The truth of life sucks.  

Love You All  xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Ya'All are the best  xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox

Extras of these  xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Extras of these  xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Now for really really cya cya cya    :D     :D