Okay, I am taking today off from work. I was going to work for a few hours, but decided against it. I haven't had a day off in a while, so why not. Obviously I like what I do at work on the weekends or I wouldn't go in. You know having said that, I may still go in. We'll see.
Now some of you know my story, and it is an ongoing story, and I surely am not the author of it am I??? I am not making my own plans am I?? It isn't just about that old dude that day I hung around with Jacob is it?? Remember mourning Barbara's DAD twice??? Once at work, where I thought I could die I was so sad. I did not plan that. I am not that caring of an individual on my own. Shortly after that everyone threw me under the bus. I p.r.'d the marathon, and didn't blog about it right?? Then I had the 5K the day after the Jacob dude's thing. I don't remember how much time lapsed from Heimleblog to the Journey. Marathon is in October though, and ahhh, Nov, 1, 2009. A few weeks passed from Heimleblog to Journey. The Wait started up right away. Like next day.
I went through a lot with very little support, but yet I stand. I remember some real low points, I mean wishing I was dead low, because well people are just fucking horrible really. It is really our flaws that make us great, and the ability to be real about them. Fake nice and fake whatever is fake. I love real people. Being real and being honest is the only way things work. You know how it says love your neighbor as yourself?? Well remember the one thing I said is our deepest desire is to know ourself. To get to know us. There is that one Goo Goo Dolls song "Iris" that says:
And I don't want the World to see me, cuz I don't think that they'd understand....
The trap we have for our self is we cannot love our neighbor as our self. Why is that?? Because we judge. We always judge the lazy, the fat, etc... I mean I don't like Lisa's Mom one bit. I hate that fucking lifestyle, and I hate her life, but I even had her time when I looked out her window. Why that obese woman is still alive is beyond me. You see I ain't no righteous dude, because we are not made that way. I made a turn, and I take some stuff from people, when they are too weak to do it on their own. I think, and I hope I don't have to do it anymore, because I don't really like doing it. There were several more that I have taken too, and I haven't told you.
If you have lost a parent recently, I may have taken some stuff from you. A lot of times it isn't because people are not strong enough, but really life is too busy.
Our common ground is none of us are righteous, and none of us are perfect, but in my tent are believers, and non believers, gay people, divorced people, drinkers, mean fuckers, dickheads all kindsa people. In my tent I don't judge you for your less than perfections, because in that way I have a pretty good heart. I think it is in good hands too. :) I suffered for it though, and still have one more thing to do. Not my plan, but when I found the way I said I was willing. Brave, or afraid of the consequences really huh?? Now I am not afraid to go where there is no hope, because my help overcame centuries ago, and he is the one who makes it work. :)
That is it for today!!! :)
Thanks for reading!!! :)
Hope Everyone has a Great and Awesome Day!!! :)
xo's!!! :)
Love You All!!! :)
p.s. I can be a dick sure, but we all can be assholes.
Love You All xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo
Ya'All are the best xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo
Extras of these xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Extras of these xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo
Now for really really cya cya cya :D :D
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