Some Days I Am Surprised...

Hello, and good morning all.  How's it going??  Me, I am doing pretty good.  I was really tired yesterday, so I did not do much.  Sleep, wake up, do nothing, and then I thought I am a worthless piece of crap today, so I went out and had a couple beers, came home had a couple more, and went to bed.  :)   Lisa was out putzing around, and man was I beat. 

So this week I am starting my new schedule, and my weekends are going to be busy busy with work.  Instead of doing the bank job 5 days out of the week for around 10 hours or so I will be working 10-12 hours on the weekend, also at a higher pay, plus I will be working my other job Friday, Saturday, and Sunday most weeks with an occasional Saturday off.  My weekends are going to be crazy busy for a bit, but it leaves my weekdays open, and most of my days off are on Monday and Wednesday.  I will definitely like that better.   I was thinking when I woke up yesterday tired I would in previous weeks have to go in and do the bank.  Blah.   Also today I would too.  Much much better. 

Financially Lisa and I are making the same we did at our previous jobs, if not perhaps more.  Also we are on the low end of the pay raise pole, not the maxed out version we were at for like the last 10 years or whatever.  Yep, no raise in like a decade at the previous place.  Much better.  A friend even mentioned to me I seem happier.  Hmmmm,  I don't really really pay too much attention.  I think I go both ways.  Some days a good mood, and some days a bad mood.  Mostly pretty upbeat I think, but who can tell. 

As to my future goals??  HA!!   I don't have any.  :)  There is nothing here I have to accomplish.  My bucket list is empty.   There is nothing in this World I feel I am missing out on.   The strange thing about me and you.   I am different though, and have been for a long time.   I guess this feeling I have of contentment came from overcoming the 2nd time.   I mean I was done.  All my struggles and all my work was done, and that is why I called my blog the wait, because none of you are done.   You still have miles to travel, and you taking the first step is like impossible, because because because because... because of the fabulous things you "think" you will miss out on. 

So here I am on this other side waiting, and it is hard for me to be in your shoes, because my life has been long, and I have been different long.  I suffered many things in the past to get where I am at now, and I don't see how the World can be so enticing to you.  I mean even during the dead time after my energy came back, and the start up of heimleblog my life didn't mean anything.   I knew I had stuff to do, but I was living the life, and waiting.  I knew during all this time I had more stuff to do, but I just waited. 

Then the original of my 3 blogs started, and I went through many things.   A lot of hard days, and as a matter of fact I think most days were pretty hard.  So my life went on and on, and I suffered through many hidden things, and now I guess I am wondering how things will turn out for you. 

I have given you tough things to think about, and I know it makes sense, and I can guarantee you what I say is true, because this is what my job was.   From the time at the garbage room at bromenn Healthcare there was a purpose.   To bring more people along.  What does it say, "when I return will I find faith on Earth?"  The dreaded numbers game.  

What does it say also when God spoke to Abraham "and Abraham believed him and it was reckoned as righteousness." 

So it isn't what you believe it is believing when spoken to that you were spoken to.   You don't harden your heart and pretend you didn't hear.   The multitudes are guilty of that.  

So anyway, those are some of my thoughts.   I don't have an easy message, and I don't give you easy answers, or easy paths to follow.   Just the hardest thing you will ever do.   The truth. 

Many always believe such and such a thing and try working their way to building their stairway to heaven, and the path is so much different than you can ever imagine.   It is a humble first step that is for sure.  

So I think I will make a second cup of coffee, and maybe take the Hopester for a walk. 

BTW I would like to thank my brother John for coming from Chicago to go to my friend Dan's funeral thing.   Little things like that mean a lot to people, and I am sure Dan appreciates that stuff, and like Lois put on her thing before Steve R's thing.   Something about going to the house of sorrow is better than the house of parties and such.   Something like that.  

That shit is a big deal to people, and it means a lot.  

So anyway, I didn't really have much to blog about, but threw some stuff down anyway.  

Have a good one all.   :)   xoxo