A New Year, A New Blog, A New Me??

No, not really.  All is basically the same.  I have not been running all winter, and I think I decided this morning while cleaning the bank that next week I start up.  I am pretty sure the temps will start being more moderate.  I am healthy, so why not. 

Although I haven't run all Winter by all visual measures  I don't think I gained much if any weight at all.  I am probably somewhere around 178-180.  170 would be a fast weight for me. 

Goals goals goals.  You know when I played Soccer I used to score a lot of goals, but what kinda running goals should I have??   I think I will go for speed.   Anything under a Marathon speed.  I look at my Marathon "career" and you know a lot of crap had to go right.  I had one go right, and my time was like 3:47 or something.   Within me is probably a 3:35 marathon, but things would have to be perfect, and I would have to be in tremendous shape, and well you know.  My body and genetics will not do much better than that.   You know you can train all your life, and do everything perfect, but there are only so many people who will break a 4 minute mile, or a 2:10 marathon. 

I look at my life, and there isn't much here.   It isn't special, although I tell you what, I have lived a tremendous life really.  It is the worst life I know that anyone has lived, but I am where I am right now.   I get answers sometimes of me.  Why I am the way I am, and you know it always comes down to that Summer many many many years ago.   The only blogging people I knew were Beth, Barb, Audrey, and Becky.  I think the 3 B's liked me, and A hated me.   Still does for all the fuck I know, but I read their blogs.   Got a picture into their lives.  On That Summer day I gave up.   Could not do it anymore.   I was soooo pissed.   I went through what I needed to go through.   My life all added up to one thing.   Although I am King, I am not King of my castle.  The blessing I received is not because of a redeeming quality about me.   I am nothing really, but I was taken aside.   To live this life, and be a help to people.  

The crazy funny thing about my life is I never feel like I do anything.   When your path is paved for you though you can do no wrong.   All that is done will lead to good, and that is the craziest fairy tale you can ever imagine.  It is a fairy tale of strength and confidence, and being assured, and all those things. 

None of you have that, and there only ever was one way to get that, but that is your own journey.   You ain't going to live my life, and I ain't going to live yours.   Together we each can help each other out, but it is a together thing.   This isn't a solo thing.   I did the solo thing.   You don't want to do that, and you don't have to.  It is hard.   That was my path though, and I took it.   Yours should be easier, but it won't be easy.   Life is full of hard shit, and no way around it.  

Anyway just touching base.   :)   Not sure how often I will blog, but I will jot some shit down here and there.   If I didn't say it, I start running next week.   :)   yay.   :)

That is it for today!!!    :)

Thanks for reading!!!    :)

Hope Everyone has a Great and Awesome Day!!!    :)

xo's!!!    :)

Love You All!!!    :)

p.s.  I don't do FB Birfdays anymore, but yesterday was Charisa's.   You know I wanted to give her some Birfday love, but I am nothing if not disciplined.   :)   HAHA.   

Love You All  xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Ya'All are the best  xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Extras of these  xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Extras of these  xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Now for really really cya cya cya   :D     :D  

Have a fab one all.   MWAH!!!    :)))