What Is Inside Me...

Good Afternoon all.  How's it going??  Me, I am doing pretty good.  I have nothing really to write about, so I figure I will just take a quick peek inside me to see what is there.  Now many years ago I had something happen to me that made me different.  This was during my tough time where I was going to make me the best person I could be. 

I was alone.  No girlfriend, it was me, my job, and whatever I did in the down time.  At this stage of the game I read the Bible a lot.  It was going to be part of the way I was going to make me the best person ever. 

I don't remember the timing of all things, but one time I was just laying in bed, and I had a vision of me, going through the eye of the needle.  I was like WOAH!!   Part of the reason is because I just had a vision.  I felt naked and alone, and it was kinda a birth of the new me.  I distinctly remember thinking that was the view of a child if he or she could comprehend, and remember what his or her Birth was like.  Through the eye of the needle. 

Anyway since I was kinda new to this game I guess I had to suffer some so I could see and learn some stuff.  I don't know all the reasons, but through some hard times I could see what it meant to be full.  Fully secure in who I am, and know I was on the right path.  Funny in a way I guess  is I feel that way now mostly.  Although I am not full.  I am poor in Spirit, and that is a blessing.  Why??  Many who are full will fall away.  They will trust themselves, and my whole Journey and life was to trust one other more than myself. 

So I had to do that thing outside the Garbage room at Bromenn Healthcare.  I had to have that Summer, and suffer some more stuff, and then a hold was put on.  My energy came back and I lived a life.  What was it 18 years of just doing my own thing?? 

Heimleblog started, and Journey and now this.  Anyway as to my title I still feel how I am different.  Every day, and every moment.  Even if I have a bit of a hard time I can feel how different I am.  I remember one time asking if you people have been through the eye of the needle yet??  A long time ago, and I think it was after the dream of me winning the race.  I didn't know what was going on. 

Anyway there is a lot that needs to be done.  At some point in time your World is going to be turned inside out.  My Summer a long time ago also put a lot of stuff inside me.  A lot of the knowledge of the life on Earth and the absurd/worthlessness of it all. 

A harsh truth gives you an easy going outlook.  When you really expect very little out of life you don't get all worked up.  I still consider this life to be really silly.  We waste our time doing a bunch of stupid Shit that means nothing. 

However there are important things to do.  How this unfolds I don't know, but it will.  It should be interesting, but maybe for a simple step you can throw away everything you ever learned.  Look at the World and life objectively.  Throw away all the I "should" be like this or I "should" think like this, because that is just poison.  That is the crap that makes us fake and liars anyway. 

The more this goes on the more I realize how much of a Bitch the truth is.  Why so hard??  I am sure there are very good reason, but our tiny ability to understand cannot comprehend it. 

This should be an interesting time.  If you throw the crap out.  The leaven that has been piled inside you since you were a kid.  We were always destined to have learned a bunch of Horseshit.  We all live in Society and nothing good comes from in there, but we live there.  There is a way out of all the Falseness and the false teaching.   Haven't I been going on about that though??

That is it for today!!!    :)

Thanks for reading!!!    :)

Hope Everyone has a Great and Awesome Day!!!    :)

xo's!!!    :)

Love You All!!!     :)))

p.s.  I have the day off, and I think I am going to relax.  :)

Love You All   xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Ya'All are the best  xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

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Now for really really cya cya cya     :D      :D