Just Like That It Is Almost November...

I slept a ton last night. It felt weird, cuz I kept thinking how long do I have til my alarm goes off?  I don't use one, it is my day to sleep in. I guess I was tired this week. Anyway, I just realized November is almost here, and before long the end of the year. It seems every year this blog has a theme. Last year was the drought year. I blogged about half as much as I used to. This year we added a lot, in what was surely a roller coaster year. I don't know what my blog totals will be, but it will be close to normal, if you consider I took a whole month off.

Pretty positive this blog accomplished nothing again as is usual. A good amount of time has gone in this thing, but I have nothing, but time. I can't say a good amount of effort went into it, cuz it ain't no thing.

What does it do??  Not really sure. What do I do??  Not really sure. I am just out there living my life without fear. I have no fear of death, cuz who cares??  We'll all die someday. I have no fear of life either, cuz unlike you I am not the product of one who took the bite out of the apple. If there is a way I am "supposed" to be, I don't know it, and if people judge  their little fiery arrows cannot penetrate me. They once could, but no longer.

You are powerless. One thing of my life too is friends come and go, and that does not concern me, cuz my life really is in another's hands, and I would not be what I am, if I didn't decide to take a path which wasn't mine.

People on their own are quite a trip. They seek out the superhuman, and there is none. All paths really lead to us judging, cuz we have to believe we are right, or what??  What does it mean if you are wrong??  You should think of that cuz you are.

How do I know??  Cuz my whole life was given to find right. Really, I seeked out perfection first, cuz I didn't know right could live without it. In my case it can, but eventually right, and perfect meet. That is the end of this story, and the beginning of a new one.

Then there is you??  What part do you play??  Currently you haven't played any part. Who, and what I am you have had little, and actually no say.

You are an acquaintance, and however you decide to act on that is up to you, cuz I am strong on my own. :)

Laterzzzzzz

xoxoxoxoxoxoxo

xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Luv ya's.  :)

MWAH.  :)))

xxoo. :)

What Am I Doing Up This Hour??

Hello, and good morning. How's it going??  Me, I am doing pretty good. I've been sleeping in this week a lot, and not really sure why. I wasn't waking up before my early alarm a lot, and really when it does go off I have to want to do this, and I really haven't. That can be for a lot of reasons, but really the reason is you.

You have been given a lot of good info on this thing, but that info is wasted on you. Your coin you bury in the ground, cuz you are afraid. You are going to be judged one way or the other, and trust me, it will go soooooo much better if you go the way I speak. If you still seek out Saints due to some faulty preconceptions of life let me set you straight.  They aren't here, and there haven't been any for Centuries.

You are alone in this Earth, and there is only one person who can help you with the truth. Me. My story has gone on long enough, I do not have to rehash it.

I really am not sure how I can help you people. What can I say that hasn't been said??

If you have a mirror, and you have your life, then I guess I know some things about you.

If life is this great thing, and all that stuff, then why don't you feel better about it??  Why are you not happier??

The answer to me is simple, cuz you are missing out on what you don't even know is available. You are seeking for perfection or the "ideal" life on your own power, and that is a mistake/ disconnect. You are not as strong as you think. You are definitely not as good as you think. (If you think that).

But hey, it's Friday.

Have a good one.  :)

xoxoxoxoxoxoxo

xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Laterzzzzzzz.  :)

I Have Time

Hello, and good morning. How's it going?  Me, I am doing so so. It seems inside me I am irritated, and not sure why. People I guess.  Who knows?  I had a pretty low key weekend. All my weekends are pretty low key. I work both days, and really nothing significant past that.

Yesterday started off pretty good. I got a ton of sleep. I could not sleep anymore, and I waited an hour in bed just waiting to get ready for work. I scouted out the temps, so I knew how to dress for the bike ride in. Do you ever start your work knowing the first person you see is going to be angry, and in a bad mood??  I knew what I was walking into on Monday, cuz that is what I walk into everyday. I realized yesterday I am done with that shit. I am tired of it, and it has no place in my life.

I thought about it yesterday too. I don't believe in shrinks. I think they know just as much of what makes a human tick as any other Joe Shmoe out there. They make people talk though. That angry dude needs to talk. Why waste your life being angry, and hating every person out there.  Life is too short to be like that. Fucking Christ.

Anyway, I am up early, so I'll take the hopester, and I'll bike to work, and then I'll make dinner. Another day in the life.

Who knows, maybe I'll even be a bit more sociable via the social networks. Maybe not too, some days you barely want to open that shit up.

Oh well, I guess that's it.

Laterzzzzzz.

A Day In The Bank

Hello, and good morning. How's it going??  Me, I am doing pretty good. I was kinda busy yesterday so kinda quiet. First off I decided to sleep til the late alarm, or my body decided for me. Actually stayed in bed a little later after that and drove to work. That was fine though, cuz after work I drove  to Lisa's work, and brought her a goodie. I've met a lot of people from her work with the funerals this Summer, and a party. There all pretty cool, and Lisa likes them all. I typically ride my bike, so I never ride my bike the 4 mikes out of the way to stop by.

Also I was going to make chili, so I thought I'd go to the library to find a recipe. I looked a bit around there, and got my recipe from the internet, and picked up a mystery book. I didn't like the chili recipe, but I do like my book, so I read most of the night, and eventually slept really good.

So there you have a day, and a night, and now I am onto another day. You can see my life is boring on the outside looking in, but I am never bored. I have a feeling you people are bored quite frequently, because your life is just the same as mine. Filled with just day to day nonsense. I gather many pretend what they do is important, but the truth will tell you different.

Life is this big thing, and aren't we supposed to do these big things?? Climb Everest, and shit like that so we can prove our worth is more than the peasants who toil day in and day out??

So much if life is actually what is on our inside, and our inside is flawed. All the things we don't want in there are there, and we hide it. We hide it with grand gestures, and who knows what else??

So I have a great sword in me, and if I didn't have a promise I would be too scared to use it. The sword I use is to help penetrate your hard hearts, because nothing else will get through to you. The purpose of our journey together is to take the path to a better us.

I am the one leading the way, because the way has been taught to me decades ago. It just so happens I lived some dead years for the right time to do this. I am being led with my heart what to do, and I don't have great vision of what we are doing, but the vision isn't horrible to what is going on.

I guess that's good. :)

Have a good one.  :)

Luv ya's.   :)

xoxoxoxoxoxoxo

xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

MWAH.  :)))

xxoo.  :)

Stayed Up Late Again.

Hello, and good morning. How's it going??  Me, I am doing pretty good. I stayed up late again last night, but I was just cooking. We had some extra chicken so I made chicken salad. We had some extra eggs so I made deviled eggs, and helped make a casserole with the chicken. Then it was time to eat, and I stayed up late. :)

Hmmmm, what is on my mind??  Nothing. I have absolutely nothing to blog about, and almost thought of scrapping this.

The mouse who runs on the wheel in my head must be asleep. Guess well just dig deep.

There was nothing to dig deep to, and then I looked in myself. I felt my content heart, and natural happy well being, and then I thought of you. Who I am you cannot be. It isn't in your power to be like me. I don't care what I's you dot or T's you cross, you are missing something of life, and you have no idea it is available.

On you go toiling in your selfish endeavors, and the answer is to "sacrifice" your coin, which isn't a sacrifice at all, but you can't feel/know that as you are to get a good coin.

Your coin is flawed. It is like the coins of the Holy Roman Empire. Here today gone tomorrow. Only one coin stands the test of time. My life has been given to teach this stuff. I've endured horrors to learn many things. Centuries have come and gone without this type of teaching, and you all lack faith.

You don't believe, and you are not obedient, and your hearts must be harder than I thought.

My job is much more impossibler  than I thought. :)

Life is just the trap you walked into when you were born. Still you cannot be as me, cuz it took me a whole life to be like me.

Silly people.

My ending has changed cuz people lack courage.

Guess that's good.  :)

Have a good one.  :)

Luv ya's. (Adding Kathleen Paslaski to this). I haven't really given her much, but she is courageous.

xoxoxoxoxoxoxo

xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

MWAH.  :)))

xxoo.  :)

Laterzzzzzzzz.  :)

Slept All The Way To The Early Alarm.

Hello. And good morning. How's it going??  Me, I am doing pretty good. But I stayed up too late again. I don't know what my deal is.  Usually I go to bed at a certain time, and these days I tend to stay up later. It isn't like I am doing anything important. Weird.

So, as I slept all the way to my early alarm I have absolutely nothing on my mind. Yesterday was a pretty good day, although I didn't really do much. I ran longer than my *normal*, and my normal is nothing I would have done in the past. I was only getting out for little 1-1/2 miler plus walks with Hope. A plethora of injuries really changes my routine. I probably don't have the capability to be a long distance runner, and stay injury free. One never knows though. I don't have a good track record of training for a marathon and showing up on game day. 5 out of 12-13-15-20??  Not really sure. I am an injury hazard.

I am healthy now though. The 3 miler I ran yesterday was actually challenging, and I used to never run 3 milers. :)   Endurance running is something you need to practice, that's for sure. I always liked the challenge of the whole thing.

Other than that not much going on. I guess I'll try and get another run in on this rainy Autumn day.

I guess that's good.

Have a good one.  :)

Luv ya's.  :)

xoxoxoxoxoxoxo

xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

MWAH.  :)))

xxoo.  :)

Laterzzzzzzzz.  :)

If I Get Up Earlier Maybe I Can Do More.

Hello, and good morning. How's it going??  Me, I am doing pretty good. Yesterday was a pretty okay day. I was able to finish work a little early, so I left an hour early. It took me about an hour to bike home with the 80MPH winds I was battling. Holy crap was that brutal.

Anyway on Sunday my wife said she would need help pulling plants, and getting them to the road, so I cut all our beach grasses using our recip saw, and brought them to the road. The city picks up all our shit like that and leaves when they fall. The trees with the major leaves still look pretty green.

Also as to my title, after I did the grass I drove out to the store real quick. There was a detour so I had to use a different way. Funny thing too, because it was the hilly side of my 6-8 mile route.  I haven't run that in forever, and I remembered it fondly. So I thought today since I woke up before my alarm why not get an early start and go a bit longer today.  So I got up, and that is what I am doing.

So what else is going on??  I think of many things a lot before I get out of bed. I think of me, and what I've been asked to do. I think of you, and I see the impossibility of my task.  It is a crazy story, and it is nutty. There must be something how it goes on and on that keeps people coming back, or staying or whatever it is they do. My heart is 100% assured in my path. My path was right, and it was good.

I know after being judged harshly it was hard for me to start up the journey, but I did. I had a lot of support back then from Barb and Beth, but I was still scared. Getting judged is brutal, especially for how I was way back then. I wanted to be right, cuz I wanted to feel secure. It was what I craved most. Being right is not in our power, and I guess that is another lesson learned. Being poor in spirit can leave one very vulnerable. So I suffered through some stuff, and what I wanted I got. Security. I didn't need to be right/perfect or whatever. I overcame the 2nd time, and the security I craved I received.

So I walk freely. I have no capability to be perfect, but the acceptance I wanted I got. During my bad Summer I had a great set of eyes. I saw many things, and most judged me. I am bad I am not good. These days nothing judges me. I see things and my heart is happy and content with them.

It has been quite a ride, and the dead years were really dead too. I never really talk too much about those years do I?

So how does this all relate to you, and what you are supposed to do??

Lol.  Not sure.

My story is for me. I am supposed to help you in ways I think, cuz it is my job. I do as my heart feels, cuz that is whose will I do. Not from my knowledge and understanding, but I am a vessel that can be used for this, and that is what is done with me.

You have your own self to deal with, and that probably isn't always easy, cuz we can't be perfect, so what is our best foot??

Anyways I guess that is good.

Have a good one.  :)
xoxoxoxoxoxoxo

xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Luv ya's.   :)

MWAH.  :)))

xxoo.  :)

Laterzzzzzzzzzz. :)