Best Laid Plans.

Good morning. How's it going?   I am fine. I woke up in a good mood. My heart was upbeat, so I thought about that. I've been this way a while. It is a gift I have that is better than any drug. You don't have this, so I kinda wonder how you are.

I was gonna start drinking coffee again, but I didn't feel like it the last 3 mornings or so. Today I got a cup. I also wanted to sleep in today, so I guess that is 5:00 AM.

Life continues to roll on. Days come and days go. I continue to roll on too. Keep plugging along. Work eat sleep. I am healthy. I work a few jobs. I sleep, and I have plenty of free time to do stuff.

In my free time I could probably do more productive stuff,  but I am content either way. I mean last week I did help put in a new kitchen, but I like just chilling a lot. :)

People are kinda a trip. A lot of different personalities out there. I think the one way you can categorize everyone is flawed. You don't need to look far to see everyone is not perfect.

We do judge though. We judge our strengths to others weaknesses,  and that makes us better.

I am probably the worst person to have around, cuz I have eyes. They see things, and you never know what I will ponder.

Yesterday, I heard a girl wanted a boob  job. Another girl doesn't like her husband. Some people life just beats the shit out of, and they can't get up.

Much of the shit that happens in life is our fault. We make decisions, and the years go on, and now look.

Our hearts guide us at times. We trust our hearts, but our hearts are not always our best counselor.

The World is strong. Stronger than you all. You cannot stand up to it, and you cannot beat it. The World is your master. My journey has led me to this point.  With help I have overcome twice, and with my help I am stronger than the World.

It takes a lot of gifts to make me the way I am, and I have travelled a million more miles than you.

It is impossible for you to get where I am save one thing.

The step that helps you get to know you. It is a good thing if you take this step.  You may be surprised at how not great you are.

I've known the truth about us for a long time. We were born to live a lie.

There is nothing easy about any of this really,  cuz everything is out of your hands, and people tend to think they are the master of their life.

Life has gone on for years and years, and happily ever after is still out of grasp.

I'm gonna read my book.   :)

That is it for today!!    :)

Thanks for reading!!!   :)

Hope Everyone has a Great and Awesome Day!!!   :)

xo's!!!  :)

Love You All!!!   :)

p.s. gonna drink my coffee too.

Love you All xoxoxoxoxo

Ya'All are the best xoxoxoxoxo

Extras of these xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Extras of these xoxoxoxoxoxo

Luv Ya's.  :)

MWAH. :)))

xxoo.  :)

Now for really really cya cya cya.    :D.    :D

Laterzzzzzz Gaterzzzzzzz.  :)

Aloha.  :)

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxx Oooooooooo. :)

Another Day Down.

Hello, and good morning. How's it going?  Me, I am doing good. I was just laying in bed for a while thinking of things.  

Wanna know what I was thinking??  I warn you it is pretty much dumb stuff.

1.  Wanna know what's in the heart of a champion??  Lust, arrogance, jealousy, anger, selfishness, greed. Pretty much the same shit as everyone.

2.  There is an old time scooter convention thingy that went on in Holland this week. Forget what they are called. First motorized scooters. People took a week of their time to ride these in a strange place with other people doing the same thing. I saw a bunch yesterday, and that seemed to be pretty ridiculous to me.

3.  Yesterday I had a few drinks. Not uncommon to me, maybe I had one more than usual, but ideas I had last night, which seemed cool, seem pretty dumb now.  :)

4. Lisa goes back to work today. She told me people told her they missed her. I didn't think anything of it, but that shit matters to her.

5.  My knee has been a bit gimpy, so I haven't been running much. Still bike to work most days.

6.  Back in the day I used to go out, and be sociable,  but I am pretty much a homebody now. I am happy in my own environment.

So you see, I have a life. A lot of little things make it up.  At some point all these little thoughts will end as I will be 6' under, hopefully breathing no more.  (Kill Bill)  haha.

What's it all mean??  It means life is short.  The years fly by in an instant.  Just a couple weeks ago I turned 40, and in a couple months it will be 50.

Life is too short to be angry, and the World is,all Fucked up. If you spend too much time thinking of ideas of how you will fix it or make a difference you are wasting time.  If you take the right steps you will accept this silly thing called life for what it is. It isn't a good thing. It's stupid. In a funny kinda way though.

People do stupid shit, and they think it important in their book, and it isn't.

I know I know I am the luckiest person in the World, cuz my heart sees, and accepts the truth.  It does it mostly with a smile too. Most of the anger that may come from me is those who think the heart of a champion is some kind of Saint.  They are assholes, cuz arrogance in a person is ugly.  The know it alls are the worst.

I guess I am kinda a know it all cuz I know a lot more than you.

What can I say??  I must have the heart of a champion.   :)

That is it for today!!!    :)

Thanks for reading!!!   :)

Hope everyone has a Great and Awesome Day!!!   :)

xo's!!!    :)

Love You All!!!    :)

p.s.  I want a day to sleep in and just read, and drink coffee.   :)

Love You All xoxoxoxoxo

Ya'All are the best xoxoxoxoxo

Extras of these xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Extras of these xoxoxoxoxoxo

Luv Ya's.  :)

MWAH.  :)))

xxoo.   :)

Now for really really cya cya cya.    :D.    :D

Laterzzzzzz Gaterzzzzzzz.   :)

Aloha.   :)

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxx Oooooooooo. :)

I Wanted Coffee

Hello, and good morning. How's it going??  Me, I am doing okay. I finished up my part of the kitchen. Couldn't get the new faucet to work, so after a few hours I took another 10 minutes to put the old one in, and it works fine.  :)

We can always get another faucet later when Lisa does the new countertop. I'll have to take the sink out again anyway. I have one little thing left. I rigged up our drain on the dishwasher I assembled a few months ago. Getting another look during cabinet installation I realized I just needed a small 1/2" piece of cpvc to make it perfect. I think I knew that last time, but didn't have any cpvc or copper laying around. Since I have easy access, I might as well fix it.

These projects are not exactly therapeutic for me. I still am amazed how well everything came out, but I find it to be more stressful than feeling accomplished.

Anyway, I woke up this morning, and I wanted coffee. I wanted that jolt I got a few days ago. I think I've weaned myself off of coffee so much it actually gives me a jolt again. I think I pretty much stopped, cuz I know it wasn't going to do anything for me. Now it does, so maybe a cup a day again.

Having a new kitchen means we are cleaned and organized. If you ever wonder what is under, and behind your cabinets just know ours is clean. 

The coffee has me going, and I am pretty excited about today. My work is done so to speak. Lisa had close to a week off, and I was able to help her get everything done she wanted. Now my life gets back to normal. It's how I like it.  :)

Another day to live, and another day to be me, which is a million times better than being you.  :)

That is it for today!!! :)

Thanks for reading!!!  :)

Hope Everyone has a Great and Awesome Day!!!  :)

xo's!!!   :)

Love You All!!!   :)

p.s.  it was pretty stressful doing that work, but it is done, so that's good.

Love you All xoxoxoxoxo

Ya'All are the best xoxoxoxoxo

Extras of these xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Extras of these xoxoxoxoxoxo

Luv Ya's. :)

MWAH. :)))

xxoo.   :)

Now for really really cya cya cya   :D.   :D

Laterzzzzzz Gaterzzzzzzz :)

Aloha. :)

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxx Oooooooooo. :)

The Things You Don't Think Possible.

Hello, and good morning. How's it going??   Me, I am doing good. Over the last few days we took down all our stupid custom made kitchen cabinets, and put in new for us ones. Lisa got a deal from work, so instead of spending several thousand dollars on new kitchen cabinets, we spent like  $200 on white raised panel kitchen cabinets. From stupid cabinets to actually nice ones.

We were actually able to make it fit too. It fit so good we were able to put our c-top back, and it fits perfect. Lisa is going to make a new countertop out of 3/4" hard wood floor. I just have to throw the new faucet and sink in. New for us anyway. Another deal from her work. Sink originally a couple hundred bucks,  and the faucet would run a few hundred.

I still am in awe we got that shit done. First time we ever Fucked with stuff like that. To have it fit pretty perfect is ridiculous.  I started the Game of Thrones books too, and I am hooked.

That is what my days have been about. That is stressful work I tell you,  but it  worked out.

There are other things going on I guess, I dreamed a lot the last couple nights. Stupid dreams I don't totally remember. Stress make you dream more?? 

Life goes on though. You think about the guy who made our stupid custom cabinets. A guy spending several hours putzing around making shitty cabinets for his house. If he is still alive he is probably screwing 80 year old ladies in an old people's house. All those hours spent building those stupid cabinets amounted to nothing. We are pretty happy with our work, and that too amounts to nothing.

There is something more to life. It is hidden, and the activities done under the sun in the end are pretty dumb. We do fill our time here doing stuff. It's just the multitudes place a million more percentage of importance to this stuff than it is actually worth in the long run.

If you could view your final days you would realize it really wasn't worth much.

Anyway I went out, and actually found out these hidden things. I lived in a hidden World no one knew about, but one.

I overcame twice so I could sit in this position now. Really your life pulls you as does your heart. You want that better version of you, but you see it is impossible.

So all you can do is hide right,?  Not really,  cuz no one is any better than you, and you are no better than anyone else.

You are really a stranger in a strange land. It just so happens you still are a product of your society, and you think that is important.

Pretty crazy.

Anyway, I gotta run. 

Laterzzzzzz.

Gas Station Coffee

Hello, and good morning. How's it going??  Me, I am doing good. I haven't bought any coffee in several months, and I am out. I woke up early this morning, and thought I might like a cup.

There are several things on my mind this morning,  and most/all I don't want to tell you.

Life goes on and on. Yours does too.  I see a famous boxer died. Everyone has him all wrapped up in Sainthood, and he wasn't. You share that together. He died, and at some point you will share that in common with him.

Your job while here if you choose to accept it, is find the way to a better you. Once your dead your time runs out, and you are at the mercy of whatever comes next.

The worst part is none of the activities done under the sun are your answer. Being a boxing World Champion is not your ticket, and I gather most of you will not reach those heights.

Life is a game of points,  and those are not yours to acquire. You really are at the mercy of one who would be willing to take you on that path. The activities you do under the sun are just that. Stuff you do. They aren't good, and they aren't bad, the just don't matter. It is just shit you do.

I could go on about things like that, but why bother??

The damn truth of life no one has time or the desire to seek.

Part of it is the false view we have of our life. One of the things we must overcome. I am a Saint or not??  I am special or not??  My life is one of the important ones or not?? 

A lot of questions like that, but you don't want to think of those things.

I don't blame you I guess, but I am already down the path that was laid out for me. You like all others are on the path of life til it turns to death. Too much life going on though to consider the end.

Oh well

Laterzzzzzz.   :)

Forcing One Up.

Hello, and good morning. How's it going??  I am fine. I am forcing this one up so to speak, cuz I don't really have anything to blog about. I was just gonna lay here and relax.

I had another day yesterday. It was much the same as others. Nothing really significant happened. Really in life I have nothing significant to do. I work, I eat, and I sleep. That is what life amounts to when you get as far as I am. The World no longer entices you in any way.

It is strange being this way, and knowing how the correct path ends, cuz without taking the right path then people tend to think there must be something significant to do. Also that we must matter.

A lot of nameless people have walked the Earth. Some may be better known than others in some way, but we still all lead anonymous lives for the most part.

I imagine people have to be somewhat torn. Life has to be stressful in some way. I know hearts are not content, cuz that is impossible.

The scariest thing for you maybe to face is this life matters right??  We must matter right? There is a purpose to living in this place which has murder, and wars, and anger, and hate, and all this stuff??

Not really. The sad state of affairs is you kinda just get born in this World. All follow their own society down its own path. Some join groups, and that may take them a little different way than others.

Typically we seek our own happiness. Our hearts deceive us, cuz of expectations being high.

We don't want stress, we want life to be relatively easy, we want to feel happy,  and we want to matter.

This existence is hard and destined for a type of failure.

No one's life is perfect, and either is their heart. We seek out Saints I am guessing, but you can stop your search. There are none here. I hope you are wise enough to know you aren't one either. If you try to portray yourself as one, than you are hiding stuff and basically lying.

Oh well. I guess I did find a little stuff today.

Have a good one.  :)

xoxoxoxoxo.  :)

Laterzzzzzz.

Just A Little Update.

Hello, and good morning. How's it going??  Me, I am doing fine. I had a pretty good weekend, and really enjoyed my day off. I got a lot done around the house. I actually have this Sunday off too. Lisa got her new cabinets delivered so we are putting those in this weekend.   She got a good deal from work. So we will have a new for us kitchen.

So I will be busy this weekend. I only will have to work for like 3-4 hours on Saturday, but I am off Friday night til Monday morning.

Other than that not much going on. Life continues to move, and I continue to live out my days. I am not bogged down in Politics, cuz I have no interest. I am not looking for some Heaven on Earth, cuz it ain't happening.

I figure I have the best of all Worlds cuz my heart is typically pretty okay. I accept the World for what it is. A place of imperfection.

As to all the other stuff you may see on this blog, you won't see it today. I pretty much got nothing.

Laterzzzzzz.   :)